My One and Only

When Harry reached across the bed, he expected to wrap his arms around Nicole’s warm body, but instead he was met with cold sheets. His eyes fluttered open as he reached to flip the lamp on next to him. His gaze darted around the room as he patted the empty mattress next to him in hopes Nicole would magically appear. Suddenly, he heard the patter of footsteps down the corridor and he briefly noticed the living room light flip on. As he sat up and swung his legs over the side of the bed, he noticed painted spotted tear drops covering her pillow, along with various stains of smeared mascara. With a heavy sigh, he stood up and started after her.

Obviously, he was at a loss as to what’d gone wrong. When the pair had gone to sleep, everything had been perfect. It was like nothing wrong had ever happened between them. Clearly, something had changed between the time he’d fallen asleep to her heart beat and now. She probably had a bad dream or worried herself by overthinking something silly. Nicole had always been the type to think things through too much, and everyone knows overthinking usually leads to doubt and doubt never leads to a positive outcome.

Harry found her sitting in the front room, curled up on one of the couches in the fetal position. She was crying softly, and if he hadn’t known her as well as he did, he would have never been able to hear it. Whenever Nicole cried, no matter what about, it was quiet, practically silent even, but she always became especially sniffly. Usually, she’d tell people she had a cold and her eyes were watering, but he knew better. He knew Nicole so well, maybe even better than he knew himself.

“What’s wrong babe?” he asked, and her body visibly jerked from surprise. She didn’t reply, but that didn’t stop him from crossing the room and joining her on the couch. She watched him through puffy eyes, and didn’t object as he scooted closer and began caressing her cheek before swiping tear-soaked strands of hair out of her face.

“Coley, please tell me why you’re upset.”

For the first time, she looked him in the eyes and for a moment she forgot why she was even upset. But after a few seconds, everything started flooding back, and the tears started to fall harder. Slowly, she sat up and his arms wrapped around her, pulling her practically on top of him. She buried her face in his chest before muttering, “What about Alice?”

“Excuse me?” her voice had been muffled by his skin and he wasn’t sure if he’d heard her correctly.

“Your girlfriend? You and I will never work out because you’re dating someone else.”

Harry sucked in a sharp breath; he’d been expecting to have this conversation, but not so soon. It was inevitable they’d have to discuss where they wanted to take their relationship from here, and there were obvious obstacles in the way (including Alice), but he’d assumed they’d save this conversation for another day, or at least not in the middle of the night.

“I’ll take care of that.”

“I don’t want you to break up with her because of me! I know we had sex and I know I’m having your baby, but that doesn’t mean we have to be together. You should be happy, and Alice makes you happy!”

Harry shook his head, finding everything Nicole was saying to be completely delusional. Her pregnancy had definitely screwed with her hormones, making almost every sentence to leave her mouth sound utterly ridiculous, and on top of all that, it was two in the morning and she hadn’t had a proper night’s sleep to give her even semi-normal brain function.

“Coley, I want to be with you. I’ve only ever wanted to be with you. Why don’t you understand that?”

“Because it’s us Harry!” she exclaimed, and in the back of his mind Harry couldn’t help but hope they didn’t wake up Louis. The last thing he needed tonight was the added drama of his mate.

“Exactly, we’re perfect together.”

“If that was true, why did things go so horribly wrong last time? Why can’t we figure our shit out? How come whenever things get good between us one of us always fucks it up?”

“I’m not sure this is the right time to be talking about this,” Harry offered, but decided to reword his statement the second Nicole gave him an angry look. “I mean, I think this is important, and I do want to figure our relationship out, but it’s the middle of the night.”

Suddenly, Nicole jerked away from Harry and jumped to her feet. She started pacing back and forth while ranking her fingers through her knotty, light brown hair. “I can’t sleep you idiot! The minute after we had sex, all I could think about was Alice, and when you broke up with me before, and the baby! My life is so fucked up right now. I can’t have casual sex, Harry! I’m not 19 and carefree and fucking Sage! I’m me and I’m pregnant and I want to talk about this now!”

Harry’s mouth quickly became dry. He wasn’t sure how he was supposed to respond to that. There’s was obviously a lot worrying Nicole, possibly a lot more than she was willing to tell him, but it was clear he wasn’t going back to bed anytime soon, so slowly he got off the couch and walked towards her. Nicole’s arms were crossed against her chest and she didn’t seem the least bit thrilled when he rested his hands on her newly existent hips. Her olive eyes looked darker than normal as she peered wildly up at him through her eyelashes, and after a heavy sigh, he replied, “I should have never broke up with you the first time we dated. That was one of my stupidest mistakes, and I regret it more that you’ll ever understand, and I could never tell you sorry enough times to make it okay. I’m going to break up with Alice though, because I love you Coley, not her, and no matter how happy I am with her, you will always make me happier, because even when I’m mad at you, you can do the slightest thing like crinkle your nose when you smile or snort when you laugh, and I’m not mad anymore.”

Nicole’s face softened at Harry’s words. Her heart-beat started to slow down and her breathing became calmer. She’d been so worked up merely two minutes ago, and just like that she was on her way back to normal. Harry had always known the right things to say at the right time. He understood her so well. She’d never had such an intense connection with anyone else but him; it was surreal sometimes how well they just clicked.

She stepped forward, closing the space between them before collapsing in his arms. Her full lips brushed against his chest, and she pulled back slightly to look up at him before revealing the one secret she’d kept locked away from everyone in her life for almost three months now. “I’m scared, Harry, and I’ve been scared for some time now. When I chose Niall over you after New Zealand, I convinced myself it was because I loved him more, but that wasn’t true. I chose him because I loved you so much more that it scared me, to death, to think I’d lose you again. Losing you killed me inside. I cried myself to sleep for months and would go days without eating—breathing hurt, Harry—I thought I’d never feel happiness again. If I would have never met Sage-” she hesitated to catch her breath as tears started to well in her eyes. No matter how much she hated Sage now, she owed her a lot, because she saved her from a very dark time in her life. After a quick inhale, she continued, “- I’ve lost everyone I’ve ever cared about, and to imagine being with you again only to have it all ripped away was unimaginable. I couldn’t live through that again. I’m not sure what would have happened, but it wouldn’t have been good.”

Nicole’s words cut Harry like a knife. Hearing her spill her insecurities like that, her deepest, darkest thoughts, and the true affect he’d had on hurt him more than he could ever describe. Nicole had lost a lot in her life. After her mother’s death, she lost basically all her family because her dad couldn’t handle the loss and her other family members just didn’t understand. Harry had been there for her, had made her feel whole again, but then he left like everyone else, and although he knew he’d hurt her badly through the break up, he’d never fully understood the underlying result of it all until now.

He squeezed her tightly, knowing that it couldn’t change anything, but hoping it would be enough to show her just how much he never wanted to let go. He couldn’t begin to imagine his life without her now. She was his everything and she deserved to know that.

He lifted her chin with his finger in order to look her straight in the eyes before speaking, “If you agree to be with me again, I promise I will never let you go. You mean so much to me. You’re my Rose, Coley, and I love you so much.”

This was it, she thought, this was the grand gesture she’d been waiting for. He was putting it all out there, and she wanted nothing more than to scoop it all up and be with him forever.

“I love you, too.” She replied before standing on her tip toes to softly kiss his lips.

“That’s all you have to say?” he demanded somewhat seriously, causing Nicole to cock an eyebrow.

“What?”

“You’re not going to say I’m your Jack?” his lips turned into a frown as he pouted childishly. He could be such a baby.

“I was going to leave that position open for Robert Sheehan, but if I have to…”

Harry’s jaw dropped as he stared at her in disbelief. Her nose wrinkled as a toothy smile spread across her lips, and he couldn’t help but smile too. In one swift movement, he swept her up in his arms, lifting her feet off the ground before placing a sloppy kiss on her lips. She giggled loudly into the kiss, and he pulled away supporting a goofy grin.

“I love you, Jack.” She said through various snorts.

“I love you too, Rose.” He replied before kissing her again.

“Fuck yeah!” an all too familiar voice yelled from across the room. Quickly, Harry dropped Nicole to her feet but kept his hands on her waist as he turned to look at Louis jumping up and down in the corner. “Don’t mind me lovebirds, I’m just fangirling over here, feel free to carry on!”

Harry obeyed his friend’s request and leaned over to kiss Nicole, his tongue slipping into her mouth, and before long they were full-on snogging.

“I was just kidding,” Louis spat as hands started traveling to inappropriate places. He was quick to cover his eyes when it appeared clothes were about to come off. “God, get a room, will ya! Our living room is not a porn studio. I'm happy for you, really, but come on!”

After noticing his words were having absolutely no effect, he started back to his room with a satisfied smirk on his lips.