I'm Fine in the Fire, Don't Try and Fix Me

I watched Vlad as he talked with some other doms. It was strange to me, the fact that people can have more than one friend at a time. There was a time when I had three, even four, at once, but that was a long time ago, long before I knew I had powers. Do you have multiple friends? Of course you do. I'm just a story to you, a good time. You have a life outside of mine.

Vladimir looked over at me and smiled. His friends seemed to take notice because strange looks came across their faces. I sighed, turning to walk to my locker. I was ruining his reputation, a reputation he had barely just started at this school, but at least it wasn't as terrible as it could be. Sometimes I missed the days where I didn't have one, when I was just me, only me. But, now I didn't really even want to be that.

"Hey, Liam, wait up." I heard being shout behind me. Another sigh escaped my lips, but I didn't stop him when he came up to me. I didn't really acknowledge him, but I didn't ignore him. He should happy about that. "What's wrong?" He asked. I closed my locker and looked at him. I couldn't help but shake my head and walked away.

"You shouldn't be seen with me." I stated, walking out of the school.

He grabbed my arm to stop me. "What?" He looked baffled like this was some mysterious consequence of something.

"You shouldn't be seen with me." I repeated, ripping my arm away from him and continued to walk towards my car.

"Liam, will you just stop for a second, please?" He asked, but I didn't stop. I kept walking until I got to my car. If I hadn't been waiting for my brother, I probably would just get up and leave. There was a chance, a chance that I was overreacting. But, I was just tired of this nonsense. Can't you understand that? I was his sideline friend, only there when he didn't have anyone else to talk to. When he was with another one of his friends, I wasn't allowed to go near them. Because no matter how I felt, I couldn't bring myself to ruin him as well.

"What?" I asked.

"Why are you acting like this?" He questioned.

I rolled my eyes. "Acting like what?"

"Like some jealous teenage girl!" He exclaimed.

"Yeah," I said. "Well, technically I am exactly like some jealous teenage girl. So, I'm perfectly allowed to act this way."

"What has gotten into you?" He sighed.

"I'm just tired of it, okay?" I yelled. Some people looked our way, but a quick glare thrown at them made them stop staring. "You don't know it feels like to be me. You don't. I'm just tired of feeling like a freak. I'm tired of not having anyone besides my mom to talk to about this stuff. And, I'm damn tired of pretending that I don't care! I feel like your secret fucking friend all the fucking time!"

"Hey, I'm not the one who did that. You refuse to be seen with me in public, not the other way around." He argued.

I scoffed. "Did you ever think why? Talking to me is social suicide, don't you know that? Every time you talk to me in public, everyone thinks you are a freak, just like me. Look, these past few weeks have been great, and I finally got what I always wanted, a real friend. It's just . . . I can't get too attached. I have to learn from my mistakes, and I've fallen too deep in it before. I just don't want to get too attached to you when I know the second that mating ceremony happens tomorrow, we will be through."

"You don't know that." He said shaking his head.

I put my hands on the side of his face, making him look at me. His deep brown eyes were the true perfection, but I had to tell myself that this friendship wouldn't last. "Vlad, listen to me. You are a great guy, one of the best, but this relationship, this weird friendship, it will not work when you are mated. It won't. Your mate will be fantastic, and you will deserve every second of happiness you get with them. But, they will know mw as the freak I am. They will, and, us, we will be nothing anymore. Like I said, I've done this too many times before."

"Liam, you don't know the half of it," he muttered to himself, loosening my grasp on his face. "I'll see you tomorrow, and I can guarantee that we will not be over."

I didn't know what to do. All I did was watch him walk away. He waved to Blake when he walked by like nothing was wrong. This was so wrong though. Don't you see that? He was so confident with something that wasn't real. It wasn't going to happen, and he was building my hopes up. There was a slight disappointment; I'll admit that, with the fact that by tomorrow he will no longer be my friend. But, he promised, you say? Yeah, he did, but I heard promises before, so many before.

I went to sleep that night thinking of the next day. My whole life was going to change, but I wasn't even worried. It was a feeling of numbness, really. My mother said it was the same. She said it was a feeling of weightlessness. That the next day her entire life would be turned upside down and there was no controlling it. The more I thought about it, the less stressed I actually felt. There was finally something that I didn't have to learn how to control. It was all decided for me, and I guess I kind of liked that.

My entire life I had to control my powers. I had to control my grades. I had to control my life. This was finally something I didn't have to worry about. It was nice. Really, it was. There was this thing growing inside of me at all times, and at any second, it could snap. It could destroy things, and I would be able to do nothing to stop it. Every waking moment, I had to live with that knowledge, that maybe one day I could kill people and do nothing to stop it. But, this, mating someone, it wasn't up to me. It was something I just had to accept or deny. There was no picking. There was no choosing or denying. There wasn't the possibility of death. It was just really going with it.

My mother wrote me a note in the morning saying Good luck. Your father can't wait to meet him. And, I couldn't help but laugh. My father had spent the entire night telling me which kinds of behavior he wouldn't accept, and he wanted me to remind whoever it was that he could very easily kill without guilt. Exactly what you want to hear from your father, isn't it? At least he cares. Thane told me that he wouldn't care who it was as long as he didn't treat him like a little kid. And, I'm pretty sure Blake is aspiring with him and my father to threaten the poor soul who gets picked for me.

"So, I'm going to get a ride from Mr. Patrick today since you have your mating thing, and so does Vald. So, me and Drake don't have rides." Blake said.

I nodded my head. "Yeah, okay. I'll see you when you get home then. Just please don't be too hard on the sucker who I get mated with, please."

"Oh, it isn't me you have to worry about." Blake responded with a sly smirk.

"Yeah," I sighed. "Dad's going to be a pain in the ass, I know. But, don't encourage it!"

"Oh, I will. Don't you worry about it." He yelled while walking away.

I couldn't help but laugh at him, walking to my class. Typical family, always conspiring against me. We all picked on each other, but it was how we showed that we loved each other. Like the humans always say, mockery is the past form of flattery.

Speaking of humans, they were all on edge today. It was typical for this day every year. They would always feel extra nervous because the vamps were a tad bit nervous. And, when a dom gets nervous people have a better chance of dying. It was honest. But, another reason why the humans were especially nervous was, you guessed it, little, old me. It spread around the school when I got a little too nervous and all of the chemistry equipment exploded. It wasn't my fault I swear! But, the rumor mill here is quick, so the humans were practically running out of my way.

The announcement came overhead, and every single body in the room exploded with different emotions.

All seniors report to the auditorium. All seniors report to the auditorium.

I sighed. Here we go.

People bustled out of the rooms, into the halls. We were a giant mass of people crowding into one area. I've never seen so many emotions at one time. I could feel all of them crash down on me. There was one moment, I was glad that I figured out my powers at a young age, which was now. I knew how to keep my powers under control while this little catastrophe was happening.

The humans sat at one side, the vamps on the other. Everyone was on the edge of their seats, each for a different reason.

The names started to be called, and one by one people smiled big enough to block out the sun. Everyone seemed pleased with their match as they bounded up the stairs to their mate. They smiled and kissed and held hands, and a part of me envied them. My mate wouldn't act like that. Everyone in this school pretty much hated me. But, this was a good day, so I shouldn't get down on that prospect too much.

"Vladimir Wentz," the council member called. My throat got dry. This was it the moment when I see the person who was going to ruin the only good thing to ever happen to me. They better treat him right. He deserved it. He deserved it a lot more than these other people did.

"And, Liam Sykes." I think I just died.