I Love You...Like A Gun To The Head

Stubbornness. It could make us or break us. Such a little thing that's, in some way, a part of every living person. Whether it be a slight glimmer shining in our eye every now & again or something as clear as day. Either way it's something that is always with us. And Blaze Thomson had enough of it to go around. Twice.

Acceptance went along with the stubbornness. One of the main reasons why she was always so stubborn was because she would never admit or accept anything that made her seem weak or wronged. She always had the last word, & she didn't care what she had to in order to achieve it.

California lay hundreds of miles behind Blaze now. The one place she loved so much, maybe even more than Seattle, was just a speck in the distance. Hell, it wasn't even a speck now. It wasn't there at all! It hadn't been for nearly two weeks.

It crushed her to leave the state she adored so much. Her entire mood seemed to just drop. But that wasn't the only thing. There was someone else bringing her temper up to it's blazing self. In fact, it was wasn't just one person. It was two.

Josh was the first person. That was a given. He didn't even need to say a single word & Blaze would be angry with him. But there was someone else with him now. A girl. A fake, bleached blonde, Orange County, girl that was now settled in the Flyleaf bus. She had Josh wrapped around her bony little finger more tightly then Blaze could ever imagine! And Blaze hated it.

Not only had Josh been spending all of his time with her, it was as if Blaze wasn't even there. Like he didn't know who she was. Or better yet, that she was never there to begin with.

"He's completely pussy whipped!" Roared her voice through Candy Heart's hotel suite as everyone sat around playing video games after the nights show. Her arms were thrown up in dramatic effect as she spoke. "Completely & utterly pussy whipped!"

Her sister seemed to be the only one to acknowledge her. "Why do you care so much? He's just another guy in the life of Blaze. And God knows you've had enough of those to last 3 lifetimes." Joked, Maribeth. But it was only slightly aimed as a joke.

"I don't care, sis! I just can't stand that little tramp!" There was almost a hiss of resentment to her voice as she yelled.

"Blaze, hun, don't take this offensively, but if you didn't care you wouldn't be here complaining about it. I think you're jealous of her." Dave spoke from his seat on the couch next to Mikey, a Play Station controller secured in his hand.

"Well no one asked you Dave!"

"He does have a point, big sis." Came Mikey's two cents.

"I agree with them, sis. When have you ever cared about some other girl, or guy for that matter, other than yourself?"

"Fuck you all!" She huffed, her arms crossed & eyebrows creased as she stormed into her bedroom in their hotel suite.

She sat there for a while thinking things over. But it was useless. Her mind was a cloud of so many thoughts it exhausted her. And it didn't take long for her to drift into an uneasy sleep.

A door slamming in the distance followed by loud chatting awoke Blaze from her restless, dreamless nap. Slowly she walked into the living room of the suite. Everyone was still sitting where she had left them, but now Josh was there & he looked terrible!

"What the fuck happened to you." Blaze mumbled as she plopped down next to her sister.

Josh's face was distraught. Eyes red & glossy & dull. Their usual green vibrance was gone making his face look older, almost death-like.

"It's Lucina. Sh-She left." His voice was choked & dry.

"Ah man, Josh. I'm sorry, bud." Dave spoke sincerely, setting his controller down & shifting his feet so Josh could sit down.

"I don't understand it man. Everything was perfect! It was better than perfect! And then she just decided to leave, just like that. It doesn't make sense!" His hands were grasping his head & what little hair was there. He was an emotional wreck & all Blaze could do was roll her eyes.

"Why are you so upset about it? You've known her, what, two weeks? Come on now, Josh." Said Blaze, earning a deadly glare from Josh's heartbroken eyes.

"Leave the poor kid alone, Blazey! He's heartbroken!" said Dave.

"Heartbroken my ass! We are 23 years old Josh! There's no way we could love anyone but ourselves. Especially after only 2 fucking weeks."

"Just because you're too fucking selfish to find true love yet doesn't mean you have to bitch because someone else found it before you!" Josh snapped angrily.

"Don't you fucking yell at me Joshua John Mosley, just because some dumb tramp left your sorry ass!"

" I think somebody's jealous." Mumbled Mikey in a sing-song voice as he whistled mischievously.

Blaze retaliated, referring to herself in the third person, "Blaze Thomson does not get jealous!"

"No. I think he's right. Ever since I met Lucina you've been a bigger bitch than ever! Hell, anytime I'm with any girl that isn't you, you start to bitch & get all defensive. I think you are jealous, Blaze. In fact, I think you love me!"

Everyone was staring between Josh & Blaze now as this argument continued to get ever more heated.

"Ohhhh. Blazey's in lovvvve!" Came again Mikey's two cents.

"Oh please spare me, Josh! I love you like a gun to the head! That's how much I fucking 'love' you!" Her face was contorted into an angry grin, fingers up making air-quotes as she spoke. Her voice a mocking tone. "Now if you would please excuse me. I think this conversation is over." She turned on her heal, walking away. Her well known attitude still lingering as she slammed the bathroom door.