Five Is a Four Letter Word

Jamie kicked the door of the bathroom closed, and locked it, before slumping onto the floor and burying his face in his hands. 

"Jamie!" he heard Ian's voice calling. "Ja-mie."

The doorknob turned, but the door stood still. Jamie bit his lips, ignoring Ian's knocking.

"Jamie! Open the door!"

The dark haired man pulled his legs against his chest, laying on his side on the tile of the hotel bathroom, his long hair scattered around his head. 

"Jamie please."

Jamie kicked the door again, trying to get Ian to stop calling. 

"Jamie..."

"Stop. Trying." Jamie growled. 

"But Jamie!" another series of knocking. 

"STOP IT!"

There was a silence. 
Jamie sat up, and grabbed the hem of his shirt, pulling it over his head, and throwing it into the sink.
He squatted, burying his nose into his knees, arms wrapped around his legs, back turned to the door. 

"Jamie, baby..." Ian's voice called softly.

"Don't call me that. You have no right of calling me that. You fucking FREAK." Jamie muttered, spitting the last word like venom. 

"Freak?! Cause I'm the freak now?!" Ian suddenly screeched, hitting the door. "I can think of someone way freakier than me, you know?"

Jamie took a sharp intake of breath. 

"You're doing it again." he mumbled.

"What?"

"Getting angry. Trying to make me feel worthless. Trying to make me BELIEVE you're the only one that will want of me just so you can fuck me everytime you want like I'm some fucking sex doll."

"I never--"

"Oh you never? And I've been fooled by that. Everytime when I woke up after you fucking used me to satisfy you cock, I was thinking, 'he made love to me'. When really, for you, you just needed some place to put your dick and get off! And I just happened to be the only one around WILLING to let you fuck me. I'm tired of being your sex toy, Ian!"

"No! No, really, Jamie! Jamie, I do care about you."

This sounded so fake. Such a fucking lie, as much as Jamie wanted it to be true.

"I don't want to know if you care, I'm tired of being used for sex! I'm tired of waking up in an empty bed and seeing you've gone to sleep in the other bed after having come inside my body! I'm tired of being just... Meat!" Jamie spurted out. 

There was a silence again.

"...fine" Ian sighed. "Believe what you will. I'm going to bed."

Jamie stayed like that for a few minutes, before crawling towards the bathtub and running himself a bath. 
Once the tub was full, he slipped inside to hot water and closed his eyes. 
He was fed up with what Ian did to him, but at the same time... 

He hoped that Ian would come into the bathroom, and plunge his body in the bath, close to Jamie, and take the keyboardist's body in his arms to carress him and kiss him all over. 

He loved Ian. And Ian would never love him. Jamie had tried before. But Ian didn't want more than just sex from him. 

Ian didn't come. Jamie slid out of the bath after a good half hour, and looked at his refexion in the mirror.

Ian could look at himself for hours. He was a bit like a modern Narciss, really. But when Jamie looked at his body he was never satisfied.

Too short. Not attractive enough. Not big enough down there. 

He shook his head and grabbed his pyjama boxers in the little bag that he had put onto the shelf. 

The hotel room was dark and silent. Jamie walked over to his bed, his eyes darting over the shape of Ian's still body in the sheets of the other bed. 
The short man slid under the comforter, and hid his face in the cushion, back turned to Ian. 
His eyes prickled a bit. But he swallowed his sobs. 
Manly man, eh?

He rolled on his side, and started drifting off to sleep, slowly. 
Until a pression on the mattress, next to him, shook him awake.

"E?" he whispered. 

"Shht." 

He felt a warm body being pressed against his back ; erect nipples against his shoulderblades, muscular arms wrapping around his waist, and an erection pressing on his arse. 

And again, Jamie was defenseless, willingless. He was Ian's. Without an hesitation.

Two hands pulled down his night boxers. He didn't even protest, feeling Ian's warm hard on slip on his skin. Ian's leg locked above Jamie's, as he spooned the shorter man, and put a kiss above his ear. 
Jamie bit his lip, feeling himself getting hard. Ian smiled against the keyboardist's skin, and Jamie gripped at the sheets as an expert hand wrapped around him. 

"Fuck. Ah, fuck." he swore under his breath as the fingers moved over him. "Ahh."

Ian just smiled wider, and with his other hand, positioned his cock at Jamie's entrance, rubbing it on his crack slightly. 
Jamie bit deeper on his lip. 

"Oh... E-Ian, just, please... Please do—ahh, Ian!" Jamie hissed through clenched teeth as Ian slid himself slickly into him. 

Ian bit down on the back of Jamie's neck, the hand that wasn't wrapped around the older man's waist intertwined in the long silky hair. 

"Fuck. Ah, fuckfuckfuck. Shit. Oh. Oh!" he gasped desperately, feeling the usual pleasure numb his mind as Ian thrust in and out of him. "Oh yes. Oh! More. More! Fuck! Oh, oh!"

His toes clutched as his body shook lightly between each push, and he gripped to the sheets for dear life.

"Ian... OH! OH IAN!" he screamed, overwhelmed by a dash of intense rapture. "Here... Here! Oh yeah, E... That's good... Oh fuck! Oh more... MORE!" he moaned breathlessly. "Uhh... AaaAAh!" 

Ian kept hitting and brushing over his prostate, and Jamie was losing himself. 

"Shit. Oh shit." he whimpered. "Oooh! Oh like that, just like that, that's it, here, uuuuuhhhh!" he tugged on the sheets again as Ian smirked, continuing to thrust into the short man. "Oh my god" Jamie breathed. "Oh. OH! Ohhh, Oh yeah. Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah, OH YEAH!" he went, crescendo, with each breath-taking thrust that sent his hips moving forward. "Oh Ian! Ian! Ah! AH!" he moaned, feeling he was reaching climax. 

"Fuck! Oh shit, fuck, fuck, Ian! Ian I'm... Oh just like that, here, here, HERE!" he shouted. "Oh my god, yes, yes, oh here, Ian... Oh shit... Oh... Ohhh, oh, yes, so good, oh, ah, ahh, AH IAN!"

He came all over the crisp white sheet, his sweating hair sticking to his face, as he felt Ian releasing inside of him, caught in pure bliss, so happy yet feeling so strange as Ian slid out of him and the orgasm wore out. 

A tender carress was lay on his back as he uncontrolably drifted to sleep, and a kiss was put on his cheek. 

The last thought that ran through his mind before falling asleep, was nothing but the cruel truth.

Ian had used him again. And Jamie had enjoyed every second of it.