Anonymous

“Mate,” Harry gasped as I walked back into the hotel suite after making sure Jess turned into traffic safely. God, she was incredible. If only we’d been able to spend more time together. But no. Harry had to come in and fuck up everything.

Ignoring him, I made my way into the kitchen and readied myself my own tea after noting that Harry had already taken care of himself in that regard. I was just getting to stirring when Harry’s irritatingly slow voice sounded again.

“Helloooo? Louis. Are you going to answer?”

“What do you want?” I sighed, throwing the spoon into the sink and taking a sip of my drink. The water had cooled down somewhat significantly when I walked Jess downstairs, so instead of the hot I hoped my tea was, it was almost verging on lukewarm.

There was a short silence before Harry finally expressed with exasperation, “That’s the girl you’ve been obsessing over for the past couple months? Her?”

“Yeah,” I responded haughtily, glaring at Harry. “Why? What are you saying?”

“Louis, don’t make me say it.”

“No, say it. I want to know what you’re thinking.” In truth, I knew exactly what was on his mind, but I wanted to hear him insult her out loud. I wanted to know how much of an arsehole my best friend was.

“She’s just…” Harry sighed and shook his head. “Look, I don’t want to be mean, and you know I’m against saying what I’m thinking. She’s just…not exactly what I expected. She’s crafty with the way she takes pictures.”

“No, she’s not,” I protested. “Most girls just take pictures from their chests up. Because they’re taking pictures of their face.”

“Then you’re doing it wrong,” Harry laughed, but I interrupted him.

“You’re being a tosser,” I snapped at him. “You’re trying to say she’s fat. And she’s not. She just has curves.”

“I’d never call a girl fat,” my best friend objected seriously. “I know what it does to a girl’s mind.”

“I know. That’s why you’re not saying it. But she’s not fat. She’s beautiful. And I’m in love with her, so if you have an issue with that, then you can go sleep in Liam and Niall’s room.”

There was a drawn out, awkward silence between the two of us as my truth settled between us. “Wait, did you just say you’re in love with her?” Harry repeated in shock. “As in, for real?”

I hadn’t debated the topic much before I said it aloud, but I meant it. I didn’t think I’d felt the way I did before I met her in person, but spending the day with her, eating and talking with the real her, without an internet or mobile phone connection between us, made all the difference in the world. I’d never fallen for a girl so quickly, but it only took a little over two months for me to fall completely in love.

I cleared my throat, snapping myself away from my thoughts, and turned to face Harry. “Yeah, that’s what I said.”

“Did you mean it?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I did.”

Harry shook his head. “You have no idea what you’re getting yourself in to. Do you really want a repeat of Eleanor? Where you guys are madly in love, and then you get too busy to talk to her, and she gets fed up with waiting around for you?”

I flushed with anger. “Things were different with Eleanor. I…didn’t treat her the way she deserved. But with Jess, we started off our communication over the internet and text, so we’ll be able to keep it up more easily.”

“But now you’ve talked and met in person,” Harry reminded me, as if I had forgotten. “You’re going to feel like something’s missing when you go back to talking only over technology.”

In truth, I already had. Even before Jess and I met, I always felt like we were missing that excruciatingly important part of our relationship together. But if I could deal with it before, then I could deal with after.

Hopefully, anyway.

As Harry’s suggestion settled between the two of us, my mobile started to go off, signaling that Jess was home and safe. Without excusing myself from the conversation, I answered the call. “Hello?”

“Hi, Louis,” Jess’ familiar voice sounded over the phone. “I just wanted to say that I’m home and safe.”

“You left way too early,” I laughed as I walked into the room that I’d claimed as my own, shutting the door behind me. “That only took you twenty minutes.”

“The city traffic wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be.” There was a soft spot of laughter on her end, and I noticed that, now that I knew what her voice sounded like in person, the phone left something to be desired. The tone was off, the rasp wasn’t there, and her voice sounded more high-pitched than it really was. “I was just trying to be safe. My mom actually commented that I was early when I walked in. I’m usually late when I hang out with Elena.”

“Oh, so that was your cover,” I chuckled. “I still wish I could meet them. Parents love me when I work for it.”

“I’m sure you’d charm the pants right off them,” she encouraged, “but we’ll see if you can meet them or not. It really does depend.”

“Okay.” Remembering our conversation from earlier, and I added, “Maybe I could go over the day after tomorrow and help you intimidate your sister into staying quiet?”

“I thought you didn’t approve of my blackmail method,” she repeated knowingly. “Have you changed your mind? Or come over to the dark side?”

“Both. I just want to help out my girlfriend.”

I’d taken the plunge by using the term, and more than anything, I didn’t want her to dispute it. Or even bring it up. I just wanted her to accept it, realize what it meant, and then move on with the conversation. Because bringing attention to it would just embarrass me and make me regret ever saying anything.

“I’m glad you feel that way,” she answered softly, and I had no idea whether she meant about my feelings toward her or my feelings toward supporting her. Maybe it was both. “Alright, Louis, I’m going to shower and get to bed. So I’ll talk to you later. Goodnight.”

“Goodnight,” I replied. “I’m glad you made it home safely.”

“Me, too. Because death doesn’t really sound like something I want to do right now.”

“It’s not something I want for you, either.” I coughed into my elbow, catching a little dust in the air in my throat. “Alright, so I’ll talk to you tomorrow?”

“You will. Oh, and when you come over on Monday, just make sure that it’s after three, okay? I have school.”

“Right. School.” I let out a long breath, remembering those awful days. “Okay, I can do that. Now goodnight for real, Jess.”

“Goodnight.”

Before I could say anything else, the familiar click of a call ending sounded in my ear. Something felt like it was missing, but there was no way I could tell her what I had realized I felt for her. It was far too soon, and I’d just scare her away, which was the last thing on Earth I wanted to do.

I threw my mobile onto the side table next to my bed before stripping off my skinny jeans and slipping into bed, falling asleep almost immediately. I absolutely could not wait until Monday.