Distance

His fingertips caressed my cheek lightly, feeling more like the faint brush of a butterfly’s wings than a meaningful gesture. I swallowed the lump in my throat and offered up a pathetic smile. There was simply no way that he couldn’t see how miserable I felt. Both of us could feel it in that moment: a chasm was splitting apart the space between our bodies.

“It’s only one year,” he assured me. “I’ll be home before you know it. I’ll wait for you, I promise.”

The words sounded nice, but I wasn’t naïve enough you truly believe them. A year was a long time, a lot of things could happen. I didn’t even know where I would be in my life when he came home. I feebly cleared my throat.

“Go and have fun in Australia. Let me live vicariously through you. Bring me back a koala bear.”

“They have Chlamydia,” he replied promptly.

I smiled genuinely for the first time in days. “You came up with that a little too quickly for my taste. But somehow I believe you. Don’t forget to write.”

He kissed my forehead then. It was the only time his lips had ever touched my body. The two of us had danced around the idea of a real relationship until it was too late. He was leaving. He would be halfway around the world soon, and I would be alone.

I yanked my headphones out of my ears as I walked into the vitamin store. My roommate had told me about it, raving about how helpful the salesmen were. I knew that there was a thin line between helpful and smothering, but I’d decided to give it a shot. I wasn’t getting the proper nutrients in my diet; I rarely found time to eat at all. I had taken matters into my own hands and ran off to the complete other side of the globe from Kellan. He had left me first, so he could wait for me to come home from my year of studying abroad in Ireland.

I had no idea what I was looking for. I had never bought supplements before. Now that I thought about it, that probably wasn’t a good thing. I walked up to the front counter, where an exceptionally buff man with curly hair was standing.

“Excuse me-” I began.

“He’s not here,” the man cut me off in an exasperated tone.

I couldn’t hide my surprise. “What? Who? I’m sorry, I just was told that this was the place to come for meal supplements and vitamins.”

The man looked both relieved and embarrassed by my response. “Sorry,” he said with a smile. “What exactly are you looking for?”

I should have been irritated, but something about the Irish drawl that fell from everyone’s lips around here left me in an eternally pleasant mood. I was already reconsidering moving home, and I’d only been here a few weeks. “I’m a student, so I’m on a budget, but I’m a senior and I rarely have time to make a proper meal. I just want to make sure that I’m getting everything I need to in order to stay healthy.”

He hopped lithely over the counter and walked past me quickly. I followed behind, staying a few paces back. As he scanned the shelves for whatever product he was looking for, a slightly younger and much thinner man walked onto the sales floor from the back room. He was almost gangly, though his tight long-sleeved white shirt showed a hint of an outline of biceps. His fashion sense immediately caught my attention; his red plaid pants were paired with grey Converse high tops. My gaze travelled up his body to take in an attractive face; his skin was tan and his green eyes seemed to pop and capture my stare. His curly, dark hair was cropped short, making his ears appear to stick out a bit. Around his full lips was a bit of dark facial hair, though he seemed to be able to pull it off. He seemed completely unaware of the fact that I was gawking awkwardly at him as he approached me and the salesman.

“Hey Brendan, I’m hungry. I’m going to go and get some take away. What are you in the mood for?”

The salesman, who I now presumed was named Brendan, shrugged his thick shoulders. “Whatever you grab will be fine, Robert. You know what I like.” Brendan faced the shelf again, and I tried to compose myself as Robert noticed my presence.

He smiled at me warmly, nodded his head in greeting, then turned and walked away. I watched him disappear through the glass doors before he turned on the sidewalk and disappeared from my view. I let out a small breath.

“I suppose the secret is out, then,” Brendan grumbled. “He’s just visiting for a couple of hours. Don’t go telling all your friends he’s here, alright?”

I frowned, confused. “What do you mean?”

“I mean that he may be an actor, but he’s also my brother. I don’t want my place of business to turn into a fan hangout where he can’t show his face anymore.”

My curiosity overtook my judgement. “That guy is an actor? I mean, I know he’s good looking, but I never imagined he was famous. That’s cool, I guess.”

Brendan fumbled. “Wait, you didn’t know? Every girl your age that comes in here is hoping to spot him.”

“I just moved here. From Canada,” I added. “I can honestly say that I’ve never seen him before.”

Once again, he seemed to be almost ashamed of his initial reaction to me. “Oh. Never mind then. Here,” he grabbed a box off of the nearest shelf and held it out toward me. “If you have one of these shakes for breakfast every morning, it will pretty much give you all the vitamins you need for the day.”

I accepted the box gently, reading the front. “I’m not really a chocolate person. Do you have any other flavours?”

Brendan’s eyes narrowed slightly in a judgmental manner. “So you’re a young girl who doesn’t like chocolate, and also doesn’t know who Robert Sheehan is? Has anyone ever told you that you’re a bit odd?”

I shrugged off his words. “All the time. But that doesn’t change the fact, now does it? I’m not going to change just because someone points it out.”

A small smile broke through his sceptical façade. “There are a few different flavours here. I’ll leave you to pick through them yourself.”

When he walked away, I took a few moments to peruse the merchandise before me. I settled on some vanilla shakes, then headed up to the register to pay. Brendan took my money, laughing lightly when it took me a few extra moments to figure out exactly how much to give him. I was new to this monetary system; it wasn’t my fault.

I thanked him politely, then headed out the front door. Just as I opened the heavy glass door, a wiry body came crashing into it. I stopped, turning to see Brendan’s brother sprawled out across the sidewalk, take out food spilled across the cement around him.

“Oh, God,” I murmured, cursing myself for causing such an incident. I offered him a hand. “Here, let me help you up. I’m so sorry. Can I buy your lunch? It’s my fault that it has been wasted, after all.”

He allowed me to help him get to his feet, but he gave me a wide grin in return. “Don’t worry about it, I can just go and get more.”

“No, really,” I began pulling money out of my pocket. “I feel awful. Just let me give you some cash for it.”

He pushed my hands away. His fingers were long and cool to the touch. “No, honestly, I don’t want your money. How about I buy you lunch instead? It was my awkward body that got in your way. I’m to blame here too, you know.”

I looked up, wondering if he was teasing me. He was smiling brightly, and his light eyes glittered. They contrasted his tan complexion so starkly that I immediately found myself getting lost in them. I shook my head slightly, trying to clear my thoughts. He misread the gesture.

“Well, alright then. I suppose if you’re not interested, I’ll just go before my pride takes another beating.”

I held up a hand. “No, that’s not what I meant at all. I just… I have to get back. I have a class this afternoon. But, um, have you got a pen?”

He shook his head. I sighed.

“Well have you got a good memory, then? Can I give you my number so we can schedule a rain check?”

His grin became slightly lopsided. He dug a cell phone out of his pocket. “How about I just put you in my contacts? What’s your name?”

“Maggie,” I replied promptly. I rattled off my cell phone number, as well as the number of the landline in my dorm room. “And your name is…?” I left my sentence dangling, unfinished.

“Robert,” he gallantly offered me an outstretched hand. I shook it firmly.

I smiled as warmly as I could manage while my stomach was being torn apart by the butterflies raging inside it. “Nice to meet you. I’ll be waiting for your call. Don’t forget about me.”

He winked, and the playful gesture seemed completely natural on his features. “I wouldn’t dream of it, Maggie.”

I walked away, for the first time in months feeling genuinely excited. I had an eternal smirk on my face the entire way home. I reached my dorm and found that one of my three roommates was home and lounging on the couch. She paused the DVD she was watching to greet me. I felt my stomach clench uncomfortably as I looked at the frozen screen behind her.

“What are you watching, Breanne?” I asked, trying to sound cool and casual. I sincerely doubted that I succeeded.

She gave me a patronizing look as she pulled her red hair back into an elastic. “I constantly forget how sheltered you are when it comes to our programs. That’s Misfits. I decided to rewatch series one. It’s one of the best shows to come around in a long time. You’ll like it, come and watch with me.”

I sat down on the edge of the sofa, dropping my bag of supplements on the floor beside me. “And this boy… who is he?”

“That’s Nathan. He’s the best character. He’s mine, though. Hands off.”

I couldn’t hide the completely dumbfounded expression on my face. The character might have been named Nathan, but the boy himself definitely wasn’t. He looked just a bit younger on the television show: he was clean shaven, his wildly curly hair was slightly longer, and the circles under his eyes were more pronounced, but it was definitely the same guy. I gulped.

Brendan really hadn’t been joking about Robert being an actor. Apparently, he really was quite well known. Breanne noticed my discomfort.

“Are you okay? If you’re going to be sick, please try to make it to the toilet. I don’t want to clean up after you.”

“I’m fine,” I forced a smile and got back to my feet. “I’m going to grab my books and go to class. Can I borrow these DVDs someday? That guy is cute. I’d like to see the show.”

She grinned in a knowing manner. “Of course you can. I’d actually prefer it if you did. I love having someone to talk to about my theories.”

I nodded. “Great, thanks.”

My mouth had gone cotton dry and my stomach was twisting into all kinds of intricate knots. I’d never had trouble getting dates, but even I found this to be a bit ridiculous. And what would my roommates think? Would they be happy for me or jealous? Would I be thrust into a life of celebrity status and have to fight off paparazzi?

I walked into my room and caught my reflection in the mirror hanging on my wall. I stared at myself for a long moment, focusing on the muscles that I’d worked so hard to tone. My eyes drifted back upward, and I took in the sight of my own face. I looked pale and a bit wary, but there was nothing exceptional about my features. I was a simple person, and I was being foolish to get so worked up. I laughed a bit at my own overreaction.

“So a good looking guy has my number,” I mused aloud. “That doesn’t mean that he’ll even take the time to call.”

I was being completely stupid to let my mind take off in such a frenzy when, as of that moment, there was no evidence that I would even get a first date.