Thank You for the Coffee

Gerard was a little late getting to Westside. He’d got really stuck into inking one of his favourite parts, and then Joe had offered to make them both dinner, so it was gone 8pm by the time he rolled into the cafe that evening. Frank looked like he was almost relieved, huffing out a mock-sigh.

“Where on earth have you been?” Frank asked as he started ringing up Gerard’s order before he’d even made it halfway across the room. “I had some chick pestering me for the booth earlier and I had to make some lame-ass excuse to stop her moving the cups and shit herself.”
“Sorry, my housemate made me dinner” he replied as he inwardly wondered why he was even apologising. “I got a lot of inking done today.”
Frank’s answering smile was almost proud.
“Hey, that’s awesome. Why don’t you ever do any of that in here?”

Gerard went through the regular ritual of handing over both his card and the money.
“Because it’s easier to use this thing called a lightbox, and it’s pretty fucking heavy to lug around, that’s all. I sometimes hash out rough panels while I’m here and then do it properly in the morning” he elaborated.
“Can I see your stuff some time?” Frank asked warily.

Gerard assumed that he was up on the etiquette whereby most artists guard their sketchbook with their life, hence the worried glance as he’d asked. Gerard was usually just the same, which is why he found it so difficult being at home when he drew. However, he didn’t feel this sort of anxiety towards Frank; probably because he held similar opinions of comics to Mikey. He’d show Mikey anything, so why not to this friendly barista who had practically shared his life story with him?
“Sure” he smiled, surprised by how easily it rolled off his tongue.

As Frank handed him both his change and coffee, reaching to grab his cloth as per usual Gerard heard a voice pipe up behind him.
“Gerard?”
When he turned, Gerard was face to face with his ex, whom he hadn’t seen in several months.

“...Bert.”

Neither of them were sure how to proceed from there and simply stood studying each other in a mixture of relief and wariness. Bert’s blue eyes were cold when they regarded him, even as they looked hopeful, and Gerard felt that old heat ignite treacherously in his chest. Bert’s hair was longer, and he’d grown a beard, but he’d lost a little weight, cheekbones razor sharp, mouth just as inviting as it always was. Gerard was grateful when Frank stepped in, leaning forward and catching Bert’s eye.
“Can I help?”
Bert dragged his eyes away and also looked grateful as he ordered his drink.
“Double espresso.”

Gerard hoped Frank didn’t begrudge Bert for the missing ‘please’, as it was probably his fault that it wasn’t there in the first place. When Bert pointedly kept his gaze on Frank rather than Gerard, he meandered over to the sugar stand, retrieving an extra stirrer while he was there.

*

Frank handed over the guy’s drink – he gathered his name was Bert, from Gerard’s utterance – and gave him a smile for extra measure. He looked like he needed it.
“Thanks” the customer mumbled as he took the drink, having remembered his manners now.

Frank shot Gerard a quizzical look, and hesitantly picked up his cloth. Gerard flicked his eyes up briefly at him, and moved back toward the counter.
“Frank, could you come clean up the booth for us, please? ...Bert?”
Still avoiding his gaze, Bert nodded shortly, and followed Gerard over to the booth, shoulders hunched and eyes directed at the floor. Frank darted back into the kitchen to grab a fresh tea towel and shrugged when Beth asked:
“What the hell was that?”

He didn’t make small talk with Gerard as he cleaned up the booth today, merely did it quickly and efficiently, making himself scarce as soon as possible so as Gerard could offer a seat to his acquaintance.
“Thank you, Frank” he said softly as he sat.
Frank went back to the counter, finding Beth already lingering and trying to watch surreptitiously. He joined her.

*

“So, you’ve got the coffee boy wrapped around your little finger, huh?” Bert said, both mournfully and bitterly as he sampled his beverage.
“It’s not - ”Gerard began, breaking off and sighing. “I’m a regular, that’s all.”
“Huh” Bert harrumphed. “I’ll know to stay away then.”
“You don’t have to do that” Gerard replied quietly, staring at the dark shimmer of his drink.

They sat in silence for a minute or so, sneaking glances at one another and trying not to sigh, from both the awkwardness and the regret.
“Are you...okay?” Gerard tried.
“...I guess. You?”
“42 days until hand-in” he said, trying on a grimace.
Bert looked up from his drink, fixing Gerard with a glare.
“I’ve got 35.”
“My deepest condolences.”

Neither of them could quite hide their smiles at that one, and all at once the atmosphere got a little less tight between them.

“...I’m sorry” Gerard said, looking Bert in the eyes levelly.
“...I know.”

*

Shortly after the Bert guy got up and left, Gerard left his sketchbook on the booth table and brought the two used cups up to the counter. His gaze was almost apologetic, even though Frank knew he didn’t really merit an apology of any kind. He took the mugs thankfully, and popped them in the sink before coming back around.
“I think I need a pick-me-up” Gerard said, eying the menu above Frank’s head consideringly.
He didn’t look particularly broken or anything, so Frank judged it safe enough to ask.
“So who was that?”

Gerard seemed to startle a little. When he flicked his gaze back down to Frank’s face he looked mildly uncomfortable. He opened his mouth once or twice to speak, but thought better of it, before rolling his eyes at himself and coming out with it.
“He’s my ex.”

Frank’s eyes bugged out of his head before he could help himself. Whoa. Fucking whoa.
“Whoa, you’re gay?” He said the last word in a sort of harsh whisper, and Gerard frowned a little.
“Problem?”
Frank shook his head; more to clear his mind than to insist no.
“I- I guess not. I didn’t peg you, that’s all.”
“Sorry for not conforming to your stereotype” Gerard said tightly, looking back up at the menu.

It was all coming out wrong and Frank sort of wished they could start this part of the conversation again. He just hadn’t expected Gerard to be gay. He didn’t dress weird, or speak in that feminine sort of way that a lot of gay men tended to. He just looked like Gerard, and... whoa.

“I’m sorry” he got out eventually. “I didn’t mean anything by it. I’ve never met anyone gay before.”
“You just think you haven’t” Gerard said, a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. Frank took this as a sign that Gerard wasn’t overly offended, and this relieved him. “I’ll have a cinnamon latte” he added.
“Sure” Frank said, relieved that he knew how this part worked. He set the machine for latte and rung up the order, holding out a hand for Gerard’s student card.

“So” Frank started, eager to try again as he uncapped the syrup. “Your ex? How long?”
“A few months last year” Gerard replied, his sigh mournful. “I...I hurt him, I guess. I was a total asshole before I went home for Christmas, and I ignored all his calls when I got back.”
“Oh” Frank replied, understanding it was inappropriate to ask why. “Did you meet him in class, or?”
“No, he goes somewhere else. He does fashion” he smiled, in that way that Frank could tell he wasn’t quite over the guy. Frank wasn’t even aware that he’d pulled a face until Gerard laughed and replied “Not in that way. Like...he does really awesome stuff. Sleeveless shirts for girls cut in the shape of a skull and stuff.”
“Oh” Frank said, surprised, nodding approvingly. “That sounds really cool, actually.”
“Yeah, he’s gonna do great” Gerard replied, looking down at the froth on his drink, smiling sadly to himself.

“Could you... make it up, or whatever?”
“I don’t know” Gerard murmured, shooting Frank a smile that didn’t reach his eyes, cutting off conversation by going back to his booth.