Truly, Madly, Deeply
Jetson
Senior Year Goal: Get Him To Notice Me
I wanted him. Simple as that.
Ever since last year, I wanted him. I wanted him to want me.
How cliché is that? I’m quoting 90’s music: I want you to want me.
Last year, after Pete called me a whore in front of Kevin I was mortified. Two days later Pete’s hand was broken; no more football. Someone told me that Kevin did it and I had a feeling that it was for me because Pete left me alone after that.
This year I saw him all the time. That blonde girl was no longer always with him.
Maybe this was my chance to finally find someone who would like me for me.
I was so scared, scared of never being able to stand up for myself and of having people continue to use me.
I don’t know if he would mind me being the way I am, I hoped not. Still, having anxiety, absolutely no self-esteem, and complete social awkwardness. Could anyone love that?
***
We kind of became friends last year, he was always around, but we never really talked.
This year was different, he told me things. Like, how his brother had autism and he was the one who constantly had to take care of him. I was able to tell him about my anxiety and he understood. I didn’t tell him about what Pete did though. That would be saved for later, or never.
But as the year went on I was happy.
I was happy to say that I could look at him as a friend, but then at some point it dawned on me that I loved him.
I wanted him. Simple as that.
Ever since last year, I wanted him. I wanted him to want me.
How cliché is that? I’m quoting 90’s music: I want you to want me.
Last year, after Pete called me a whore in front of Kevin I was mortified. Two days later Pete’s hand was broken; no more football. Someone told me that Kevin did it and I had a feeling that it was for me because Pete left me alone after that.
This year I saw him all the time. That blonde girl was no longer always with him.
Maybe this was my chance to finally find someone who would like me for me.
I was so scared, scared of never being able to stand up for myself and of having people continue to use me.
I don’t know if he would mind me being the way I am, I hoped not. Still, having anxiety, absolutely no self-esteem, and complete social awkwardness. Could anyone love that?
***
We kind of became friends last year, he was always around, but we never really talked.
This year was different, he told me things. Like, how his brother had autism and he was the one who constantly had to take care of him. I was able to tell him about my anxiety and he understood. I didn’t tell him about what Pete did though. That would be saved for later, or never.
But as the year went on I was happy.
I was happy to say that I could look at him as a friend, but then at some point it dawned on me that I loved him.