Go on, Scream

Seamus was frustrated. Whenever he was able to be around Dria, her brother was there. Bartholomew was perfectly friendly and hadn’t made any more threats. He also kept alternating between seeming to approve of Seamus’ feelings for Dria and being determined to keep Seamus away from her. Frankly, Seamus didn’t care too much what Bartholomew thought about the whole thing. His approval would have made everything easier by far, but it wasn’t necessary. This was between him and Dria.

Or, it would be if he could ever get up the nerve to talk to her about it.

Dria wasn’t making things any easier on him either. The great majority of the school was wary around her, whispering gossip and making a point of avoiding her in the halls. Those who remained loyal, though... well, they were like a pack of watchdogs, constantly surrounding her and making sure that she never had to face others’ judgement alone. Seamus knew that she had to be desperate for a little alone time, so even when he happened to catch a glimpse of her holed up in the library or out by the lake without her friends, he was hesitant to approach.

One day, Seamus found that he was sick of waiting. Besides, if she wanted him gone, she needed only to say so. Seamus went looking for her when he knew that she had a free period and her brother was in class. She and Morag were lounging in an empty classroom that Seamus knew to be a favorite haunt of hers. Upon his entrance, the room took on a strange vibe. Morag lifted himself off of the chairs that he had lined up into a chaise and said, “I bequeath to you the duty of protecting Audriell.” He gave a funny little salute to Dria and to Seamus and was off without another word. Seamus was grateful. He knew that Morag understood Seamus’ reason for wanting to see Dria and that he knew opportunities to get her alone had been scarce.

Dria stayed silent, though she did give Seamus a little smile and a wave. She was sprawled across three different chairs, dangling her arms listlessly off to the side. Seamus walked over to her and cautiously sat down nearby. “Seamus, if you don’t lay down I’ll feel foolish,” she complained. Seamus arranged a couple of chairs and eased himself down. “That’s better.” Dria’s eyes drifted shut.

Seamus was hesitant to disturb her rest, but this was the first time that they had been alone together since the day he had pulled that first year out of the lake and he wasn’t willing to let it go to waste. “Dria,” he began, “are you okay?”

One eye opened and peered over at him, a spark of red against her pale complexion. “That depends.”

“On?” he pressed.

“On what kind of okay you’re talking about, of course. Mentally I’m perfectly alright. Emotionally I’m holding up. Spiritually I’m bereft as always. And if we’re talking physically, then I have to confess that I’m feeling a little strange.”

Seamus frowned, not sure how he was supposed to respond to such a statement. “Have you eaten today?” Now that he thought about it, he had not seen her at lunch, though he had looked over to the Ravenclaw table every couple of minutes, hoping to spot her.

Now Dria shifted and opened both eyes, sending him a penetrating look. “That depends too.” She sighed and sat up, offering both of her hands to Seamus. He took them and sat as well. He went to release her grip, but she tightened her hold on him. “I have a confession.”

Seamus examined her, getting a proper look for the first time. Her skin wasn’t just pale, it was... luminescent. Her eyes weren’t just red, they were glowing. She looked excited underneath her languor. He thought he could guess what her confession was. “You don’t have to tell me,” he assured her. Honestly, Seamus wasn’t sure that he wanted to know.

Dria shook her head. “If we’re to be friends, you have to know exactly who and what I am. I know that you were afraid of me. I know that I managed to change that. I begin to regret that I did, though. You should be afraid. Everyone here should be afraid. I am.” Dria let go of Seamus’ hands so that she could use them to cover her face.

Reacting on pure instinct, Seamus got up and sat down on one of the chairs that had been pulled up against the one on which Dria was sitting. He put an arm around her shoulders and pulled gently so that her head rested on his shoulder. That was better, much better. Seamus was now certain of what her confession was and rather than being disturbed by it, he was disturbed by the knowledge that it didn’t change how he felt about her. “Go on, then. You’d better tell me.” It would make her feel better, he thought, when she saw that he wasn’t upset by her confession.

“I fed on someone,” Dria whispered, pulling away from him a little so that she could meet his eyes with her anguished ones. “Anthony. You know that he was one of the few people who didn’t fear me? And what have I done? I destroyed that. He’s going to keep away forever. He’s going to report me and I’ll be forced to leave Hogwarts. I don’t want to go. I so very badly don’t want to. I think it’s best, though. I’m dangerous, Seamus. You should keep away from me too. Everyone should keep away.” Dria’s shoulders shook and she embarrassed herself by crying.

Seamus felt a tug on his heartstrings. He pulled Dria back against him and stroked her hair while she cried, saying little things to comfort her. Seamus did not say that it was okay, because he knew that it wasn’t. He didn’t say he was sure that Anthony would forgive her because he wasn’t. Seamus waited until after Audriell had calmed a bit to tell her, “Anthony never would report you. He must know that you wouldn’t do it on purpose. Probably he’s more worried than upset.”

Dria breathed deeply in, then out. She very badly didn’t want to tell Seamus this part. It was something she would rather not tell anyone at all, but Seamus especially should not be the one to hear it.

Or maybe he was exactly the one to tell. “Seamus, I didn’t tell you the whole story. Shall I?”

A cloud of foreboding settled over Seamus. He was certain that this was the part of the tale that he would dislike the most. That only served to make him more determined to hear it. “Go on, Dria. It might make you feel better.”

Dria seriously doubted that, but she refrained from saying so. “I lost control. I... well, Anthony found me before breakfast and we were talking. It was all fine, all totally normal, but then...” Dria looked back to Seamus, unsure that she could get the words out. She felt sick even thinking them. This was the thing she didn’t want him to know, though she had no solid reason for keeping it from him. She braced herself and made her mouth form the rest of what she had to say. “He kissed me. I was surprised. Shocked, even. I didn’t know how to process what was happening. I panicked, and the panic made me lose control. It’s so hard, Seamus! It’s so hard to constantly keep from feeding on people. Their emotions are so strong, so quick to change. What he was radiating off just then was wonderful. It was like a drug. I couldn’t help myself.”

Seamus felt like he had been knocked down, like someone had cast expelliarmus on him, depriving him of his power and his confidence, his strength and his pride. He tightened his grip on Dria and said not a thing.

Audriell couldn’t stand to have the silence drawn out like that. She only let it be for a moment before bursting into words again. “Seamus, he has to hate me now and I feel terrible. It’s only worse because I know that I kind of want him to hate me, if only so that he doesn’t try kissing me again. Confrontation is so hard. I don’t want to have to tell him that I don’t... that I’m not... That he shouldn’t be doing that with me. That I don’t want him to. It’s best if he just stays away, but Seamus, he’s one of my closest friends.” Dria fell silent, more aware than ever of the long silence that Seamus was holding. Usually he was so quick to comfort her. She wriggled a little closer to him, suddenly very aware that this could be the last time that he let her so near. Seamus squeezed her shoulder reassuringly.

“Dria, this is hard for me to hear,” Seamus confessed. “Don’t you worry for a second more about being turned in, though. He’s got to be just as embarrassed as you are. Is Anthony okay?” In fact, Seamus was almost hoping that the answer was no. If Anthony was alright, Seamus thought it might be rather difficult for him to keep from hurting the guy himself.

“Yeah, he’s fine. Resting. I didn’t take nearly as much from him as I did from Harry. I knew how to stop it. Besides, it felt dirty, taking that from him. I just wanted to get away. I didn’t want to feel what he was feeling for me.” Seamus grimaced. If nothing else, he was now absolutely certain that Dria had no idea how Seamus felt for her. If she did, she would never have been speaking thus.

“See? This isn’t so bad.” Dria remained wordless. She was starting to think more about that emotion that she had caught radiating off of Anthony. It was familiar to her, she now realized. In fact, that familiarity was very possibly the reason that she had so eagerly drained Anthony. It was the way that the feeling was associated with Seamus.

Dria sat bolt upright. That wasn’t good. If she had learned anything today, it was that she wasn’t able to have a relationship just then. She was still too out of control, still too vulnerable to extreme emotion. If she tried anything with Seamus like Anthony had tried with her this morning... Dria shuddered. That could not be allowed to happen. “I can’t stay here,” Dria said. She tore herself away from Seamus and grabbed her bag, bolting out the door before he could get in another word.

Seamus looked down at the seat that was still warmed from Audriell’s heat and wondered what had just happened. He had caught on to her panic, but couldn’t fathom what might have caused it. Feeling vaguely uneasy, Seamus went off in search of company. He needed something to take his mind off of the strange exchange he had just had. He needed to do something active so that he could feel something other than the ghost of her where her body had been pressed against him. Seamus checked his pocket watch and realized that it was just about time for Defense Against the Dark Arts. He gathered his things gratefully and made his way to class.

***

Although it certainly wasn’t his intention, Seamus spent the next day tormenting himself. He wasn’t masochistic enough to seek out Audriell, but he did his best to place himself so that he could see her whenever possible. She had pulled herself together after yesterday’s incident with Anthony, the only change being that Bartholomew had stuck himself to her and left only when classes made it absolutely necessary. Seamus wondered whether that was because they were worried about such an incident occurring again or because she needed the comfort. He didn’t have to wonder for long.

Audriell was taking Arithmancy during time which neither Bartholomew nor Seamus had a class. So it was that Bart found Seamus in the library, seated across from where Dria tended to go to study after class. “Hello,” Bartholomew said, sitting down.

Seamus frowned. Though he and Bart were on pretty good terms, he had a feeling that this wasn’t your average friendly chat. “What is it?” he asked.

Bart snorted. “Straight to the point? Alright. I’m worried about Dria. She won’t tell me what happened, but I know something must have. She’s shaken up. What do you know about her friend Anthony?”

Seamus gaped at Bartholomew. He recovered quickly, but his surprise did not go unnoticed. “In fact, I don’t know much about him except...” Seamus hesitated. He didn’t want to betray Dria’s confidence. He was astounded that she had told him about what had happened and not her brother, who had very possibly been through similar. Seamus examined him, only now wondering for the first time just how like Dria’s experiences Bartholomew’s had been with his banshee heritage. Usually banshees were women, but when mixed with blood that was already magical, it seemed that gender didn’t matter so much.

“Whatever it is, you should tell me,” Bart said, breaking Seamus out of his thoughts.

“I don’t want to tell you anything that you should hear from Dria herself. If she hasn’t told you, there must be a reason.” Bart opened his mouth to protest but Seamus cut him off. “Hold on. I know that I shouldn’t tell you anything, but I don’t see the harm in you knowing one thing: Anthony fancies her.”

Bart frowned. “Okay, but why would that upset her so-” He broke off, dawning realization transforming his features. “Thank you,” Bart said. “You’re right, this is something I should let Dria come to me about.”

Seamus was silent for a moment, wondering whether he dared give voice to the question that was pressing on him. It turned out that he did dare. “I don’t suppose you’ve been through something similar?”

“I can’t be sure, since I don’t know exactly what happened, but I’d be willing to guess that the answer is yes.” Bartholomew could tell that Seamus was surprised to have received an answer at all, which amused him. Honestly, Bartholomew rather liked the bloke. Seamus might be a little too interested in Bart’s younger sister for comfort, but anyone could see that he had her wellbeing in mind and her interests at heart. “Since Anthony managed to make it to his classes today, I’d have to say that she managed a bit better than I did,” Bartholomew told Seamus simply for the pleasure of seeing his reaction.

Seamus, for his part, did his best not to show Bartholomew how intimidated he was. Though he had long since come to terms with the banshee blood in Dria, Seamus was still afraid of others, especially older brothers who were clearly very protective and who would likely not approve at all of any of the thoughts Seamus had about Dria. “Have you ever...?” Seamus licked his lips nervously, already regretting his question, even though it had been left half-formed.

“Ever what? Killed? No. I did worse.” Bartholomew sighed. “Don’t you dare tell Dria, but-”

“Hold on, what don’t you want me knowing?” Dria snapped from behind him. “And while you’re explaining, would you mind moving? You’re in my seat.”

Bart paled immediately. Seamus was impressed by the effect that Audriell had on him. But then, she did seem to have a talent for making strong impressions on people. Goodness knew that she had done so with him long ago.

“Dria, we were just having a chat, mate to mate. Trust me, it’s nothing you want to hear and nothing I want to tell you.”

Dria, uncomfortably aware of the probable truth of that statement and of the things that she kept from him, shrugged and sat down in the seat that he had cleared for her. “Fine. But why don’t you go off and find someone else to chat with? It’s my turn with Seamus.” She smiled sweetly at her brother, laughing when he scowled.

“Fine. But you’d better be to dinner on time. It will be my turn with you then.” Dria easily agreed.

Seamus sat in silence through this, alternately wondering what it was that Bartholomew had been about to confide and what Dria’s motive had been for demanding to be alone with him. Well, he would find out soon.