Broken Strings and Broken Dreams

"So are you coming to their show tomorrow?" Kara asked me one nice Thursday morning and I nodded with a grin. It was one of their first big shows.

The boys were getting a lot of attention because of it, not that I minded, but it was weird when I'd be trying to eat with Alex and a girl would come up and flirt with him. In front of my face.

He never flirted back. I never thought he would and it was always kind of funny when he'd turn them away but I don't know, I'd still get jealous.

"They're saying some label people are going to be there." Rian gushed for probably the 5th or 6th time. "I'm so fucking stoked guys."

"Fuck yeah," Alex agreed, clapping hands with Jack. I'd seen them play before during band practice a couple times. Tomorrow would be the first actual show I've seen so I was excited. "We're practicing after school, right?" Alex asked for the second time that morning, showing his nerves.

Jack and Rian nodded right as the bell rang so we all went our separate ways, Alex walking me to Calculus and giving me a kiss goodbye.

I actually paid attention this time, ending up with me finishing my work ahead of everyone, leaving me with a 30 minute nap. When the bell rang signaling the end of class, I hurried out the door and into my next class that I shared with Alex.

He wasn't there like usual when I got there so I just sat down and pulled out my notebook, making sure my pencil was out and on my desk too.

Minutes passed and the late bell rang but there was still no Alex. Halfway through class I could feel my phone going off in my pocket and I carefully slid my phone out to see that Alex's mom was calling me.

Sliding it back in my pocket I excused myself to the bathroom, quickly slipping my phonee back out to answer it when it began to ring again.

"Hello?" I answered, hearing a sniffle.

"Oh thank God. Madi you have to come here, Alex is throwing things and I can't calm him down. Isobel cried into the phone and then I heard something crash and Isobel cried harder. "Alex, don't leave!" She yelled and I was suddenly walking back towards my class.

"What happened? Why is he so angry?" I rushed as I heard a door that I guessed was the front door slam on her side of the phone.

She didn't answer right away and that's probably what should have thrown me off first. She started crying harder and I was amazed that I even understood her but I really, really wish I hadn't. "Daniel killed h-himself." She sobbed and I stopped dead in my tracks.

Daniel killed himself. I felt my eyes fill with tears as it fully washed through me. Alex's brother was dead and it was because he killed himself. I couldn't say anything. I didn't exactly know what to say so I mumbled a small 'be right there' before hanging up and rushing into class, throwing out an excuse and running back out of class and to my car.

I drove so fast I think I broke traffic laws but when I got there and his car wasn't there, my heart dropped. He'd left. The front door flew open before I was even out of my car and I was suddenly holding a small crying woman.

Isobel looked destroyed. She looked lost and vulnerable. When I walked into the house, Peter was sitting on the couch with his head in his hands. Isobel was stuttering out an explanation to me, trying to explain what actually happened.

When the police had searched his room for something that would explain why he did what he did, they found a letter underneath his pillow. They let Isobel and Peter read it first and then Alex when he'd gotten there but Alex went berserk and started raging around the house.

Alex's room was destroyed. The mattress to his bed was on the floor while the lamp on his side table lay broken and dangling off the side. Every CD he had was scattered across the floor and I noticed the very obvious hole in the wall behind the door.

Alex didn't show up at all that day and when I went home, I told them that I'd be there again tomorrow to help clean things up.

As I drove, I couldn't help but think about Daniel. After I met him and began to spend more time at Alex's house, I'd grown fond of him. He was Alex's brother but he'd grown into a good friend of mine.

I couldn't sleep that night. I was scared and alone in a house that I really didn't want to be in.

Isobel said she'd call me if Alex showed up home so I took up the part of calling him since I knew I wasn't going to sleep. But now that it's time for me to go to school, I was praying that he'd at least show up there.

I guess I didn't pray hard enough because Alex didn't show up then either. The guys said he skipped out on band practice and we were all scared that he'd skip out on the show as well.

So here I am, standing next to Kara in front of the stage, waiting to here the announcement that All Time Low wouldn't be playing tonight. We saw the stage manager walk on the stage and up to the microphone and I felt my heart drop. He didn't show up to this either.

"I'm sorry for the wait but it seems that All Time Low wo-," he started and then stopped, holding his hand up to press his headset closer. "I'd like to welcome you, ALL TIME LOW!"

I was confused. I looked over at Kara who probably looked just like me and when we saw Alex walk on stage, I wanted to cry from pure happiness.

He didn't look happy and I honestly didn't think he would be but he played with every bit of energy he had in him. It was close to the end and they were all sweaty and breathing hard.

I saw Alex look at me as if he was thinking about something. "I lost my brother yesterday." He said, still looking at me and I felt myself tear up. Jack, Zach, and Rian walked off the stage leaving us with an uncomfortable looking Alex up on stage until he was handed an acoustic guitar and a stool to sit on.

"I'm going to play you guys a song I wrote for him and I hope you all enjoy it. I hope he enjoys it too." He finished right at he started strumming and I saw Kara whip tears from her eyes.

I'd never heard Alex sing like that. The way he sounded kind of just put your emotions out front and when I looked around, I noticed that other people were crying too.

When he finished, I didn't think the clapping would ever stop. I wanted to run up onto the stage and hug him but as soon as a 'thank you' left his lips he was gone.

When we walked back stage I didn't see him either. Jack told me that he tried to get him to stop but Alex just drove off. I tried calling him but he didn't answer.

I was back to worrying and hoping that he wouldn't do anything bad.