Shallow Graves For Shallow Hearts

Two weeks.

It has been two weeks since you and Matt had last spoke; two long ass fucking weeks.

At first you were completely fine with him not speaking to you. You were still furious with him for what he said and what he was doing. Any hurt or guilt was immediately recycled into anger and that had worked perfectly for two days.

On the third day your anger had started to dissipate and loneliness and regret was starting to seep in. You felt bad for yelling at him and kicking him out. Maybe if you had just stopped and apologized then and there this wouldn’t have happened. And it’s not like you really had anyone else to be with at school, all your other friends went to different schools so he was all you had.

By the end of the week you were at war with yourself on whether or not to call him or let him come to you. Clearly he was just fine not talking to you, which was weird because he was usually the first to cave after fights and show up on your doorstep but apparently not this time. But really, if he wasn’t going to talk to you, why should you be the first to talk to him?

Both his and your own stubbornness were strong and neither of you were willing to cave so the silent treatment dragged on for another painstakingly long week.

So here you were, driving to school Monday morning of the third week wondering why the fuck you still weren’t talking. You didn’t care about Katie’s steel grip on him anymore, you just want your best friend back and after another weekend locked in your room doing nothing but homework, you had finally cracked and decided to make the first move but he seemed to have gotten really good at avoiding seeing you too which made trying to make amends even harder.

Come to think of it, you had barely seen him at school in general, even though you shared a locker and class with him. He rarely ever came to class anymore and he was never at the locker. It was probably a result of Katie convincing him to skip to have sex in the janitor’s closet.

Or maybe he just skipped so he didn’t have to see you.

You push that thought out of your mind as you get out of your car, trying to put yourself in a better mindset, hoping that thinking positive will have a positive outcome. You walk slowly to your locker, glancing around to see if he was coming or not.

You were so focused on looking for him you didn’t notice the blonde walking towards you until you were body slammed into a locker, books tumbling to the ground.

“Watch where you’re walking, freak,” Katie snickers as you try to regain your balance. You look up to see her and her ever faithful sidekicks laughing at you. Your heart stops when you see him standing next to her with his arm around her waist. Seeing him in general threw you for a mental loop but what made matters worse was the smirk on his face, a smirk that wasn’t accompanied by lip piercings anymore, like he found it amusing his girlfriend had just body checked you into a locker.

You couldn’t believe it though. That wasn’t the Matt you knew. He would have never laughed at someone being picked on by Katie. But then again, the Matt you knew would never date Katie. Things were different now no matter how much you wished they weren’t.

“I…” You start, looking him in the eye, flinching at the cruel glint. Closing your mouth, all thought of apologizing being thrown out the window, you turn from the group and walk away leaving them to laugh at you some more.

You blindly turn corner after corner until you find yourself in an empty hallway. You sink down to the ground as a tear slides down your face. Normally Katie’s taunts and jabs wouldn’t bother you and Katie isn’t even the problem here. It was the fact that he just stood there, laughing along with them and actually enjoying it. It was one thing to fuck the biggest bitch in the school, but another to actually join her in her hateful games.

You continue to sit on the ground, not caring that you were now extremely late for class and let things finally sink in until you heard footsteps. Your head snaps up just as he enters the hallway. You don’t know if it’s a good or bad thing he’s alone but you’re hoping he wouldn’t notice you either way.

All hopes of going unseen are dashed when his eyes drop to the ground and see you sitting on the ground in a pathetic lump. Instead of the cruel glint his eyes are like brick walls, not letting you in at all. His mouth opens slightly, like he was going to say something and you’re almost fearful he might just insult you like Katie would. Instead he closes his mouth and tears his eyes away from yours as he turns the corner.

And just like that he’s gone. Gone from the hallway and gone from your life.