I Know That You Wouldn't Fall for That

Mike was pacing up and down the casual sitting area of the bus. Tay was sat in front of him, pinned down onto the seat by the glares from the rest of her band. Mike shook his head and put a hand to his forehead in frustration.
"What were you thinking?!" He yelled, throwing his arms up in the air. Tay cowered under his raised voice. Her own voice was small and timid when she spoke.
"Mike, you know I didn-"
"Save it, Tay." Cameron muttered from beside her. He too was shaking his head. Tay felt the disappointment crash down on top of her, crushing her and making it impossible to breathe. She felt like she was about to pass out. Both Cameron and Mike shook their heads again, in what felt like slow motion, Mike removing his sunglasses and wiping the lens with his shirt. "It doesn't matter if you actually had sex with him, it matters that every single person on this fucking tour thinks you did! You have a reputation now, Tay! A fucking reputation! All we ever do as a band is try and protect you from getting hurt and making a bad name for yourself, but we can't do that if you're off prancing around with some low-life scumbag that messes with girls and their feelings for a living! You're gonna get hurt, Tay. That's what you get for hanging around with dicks like Alex Gaskarth"
Tay clenched her jaw. Alex was not a dick. They had it all wrong. He was just trying to fit in. They didn't know him. She knew him, and she knew that he would never do anything to hurt her. She shook her head, standing up, trying to establish some authority within the argument. It didn't work. Both Cameron and Rob stood up beside her, towering over her. Jordan sat down on the couch and watched carefully, glancing at Tay with what she saw was both pity yet still disappointment. Tay sat back down, knowing she would get nowhere in an argument against four other guys. She sighed, glancing over to Jordan for help. He read her thoughts and shook his head. Ugh, he was one of them.
"Alex is not a dick." She murmered. Then clearing her throat, she gained confidence as she spoke, her voice gradually growing louder. "You don't know him like I do! He's troubled! He's just pretending to be mean so people don't question him because he's got this like, really complicated life and I'm so close to unlocking him but-"
"Tay, are you insane? He's not another one of your projects! He's a fucking moron and when I get my hands on him I swear to God I'm gonna-" Rob said, speaking for the first time, he was interrupted by Jordan before he could finish his threat.
"Guys, let her speak." he said, everyone turning to face him in shock. Everyone including Tay. "Maybe Alex isn't such a bad guy after all... Tay's the only one who really knows him here so why not let her prove her point instead of just yelling at her."
The whole coach was silent and Tay shot Jordan a look of appreciation before everyone's eyes turned to watch her expectantly.
"Look," she said, mentally planning the structure of her point of view. "Alex is a good guy. He's just a little... messed up. He talks to me though, he needs me. He's different when I'm around, he's kind and gentle. He makes me feel special. He doesn't come onto me or try to seduce me, in fact he turned me down when I was drunk and came onto him! He's so caring and sweet, and he's so funny. He listens to everything I say when I rant on about myself, and he never objects or protests he just listens with this dumb look of awe on his face that makes me laugh every time. He just needs someone to hold his hand. I think I can help him, you guys. He doesn't act rude or suggestive or flirty around me, he's friendly and nice to me and I think I love him."
Tay didn't even realised she'd said it until she saw everyone's eyes widen. The bus was completely silent and Tay watched as the anger built up on Mike's face. Tay was worried he might explode. Cameron rubbed his temples as if he had a headache, and Rob just stood there, staring at her, mouth on the floor. Jordan sat still. He could've been a wax statue. He didn't move, just looked at the ground, probably analysing everything she'd just said.
"That son of a bitch..." Mike muttered, running his hand through his hair. "Where is he? I'm gonna kill him."
He started marching in the direction of the door and Tay jumped in front of him, blocking his path.
"Please," she said, her voice small. "Don't hurt him."
~
"You pretended to sleep with Tay?" Jack said, his eyes boring into Alex's soul. Alex gulped and nodded slowly. Jack frowned and out of habit, Alex mentally noted all the things that Jack had that Alex didn't. He's handsome, he's funny, he's cool, he's happy, he doesn't have to pretend to be some asshole he's not. The list goes on.. "Why?"
"Because I, uh, I thought you'd judge me if I didn't."
"You thought I'd... judge you? What kind of friend do you think I am?"
Alex looked down to the floor and shrugged. He would rather Jack laugh in his face and make dumb jokes about him being 'frigid' than send him on his way down the road of guilt. He squeezed his eyes shut as one of his stress headaches shot through his head. Jack sighed.
"Alex," he said, slowly. Alex could tell from his voice that he was thinking carefully about what he was saying. Walking on egg shells, if you will. Alex cringed. He felt so patronised. "I know you've had it rough since... you know. And sometimes you do stupid stuff, I know that! I'd never judge you, Alex. No matter what you did. You're my best friend, I will be behind you one million percent no matter what you do. All I want in return is for you to be honest with me, I hope that's not a lot to ask for."
Alex looked down at the ground. For a second, he thought he was going to cry, but he suppressed the feeling. He shook his head.
"It's not."
It was silent for a moment then Alex looked up to see Jack's analytic eyes examining his paralynguistics. He watched him for a second, curious as Jack looked him up and down. Alex felt slightly self concious. Then it clicked, he could see it in Jack's eyes. The realisation.
"You love her, don't you?" He said, shock consuming all other emotion. Alex's heart palpitated. He didn't know what to say or do, other than stare at Jack. He knew the answer, it was screaming in his head, and Alex wanted to scream and jump it up, yelling it from rooftops and singing it while running through villages like in all the movies he'd seen. But he just sat there, motionless, staring at Jack. Finally, he spoke.
"Who?" he said, cringing internally. Of course he knew who. Jack laughed, amused.
"Oh my god. You do. You love her. You love Tay."
"I... I..."
"Just admit it, Alex! I can tell by your eyes. I've seen you around her. I just thought it was tactics but know I think back, it's not! You're being real. You love her, don't you?" he repeated the question and Alex wanted to bore his eyes out. Not knowing what else to do, he nodded slowly. Jack shreaked, bursting with excitement, jumping up from the chair. Alex couldn't help the grin that exploded across his face. He'd admitted it. He'd try to deny it for so long, but what was the point? He loved her.
Alex's phone buzzed in his pocket. It was Tay.
*I'm coming over. We need to talk.*
Alex smiled at his phone and Jack caught his eye, reflecting his smile. Alex nodded towards the door and Jack frowned, waving his hand in the air.
"I'm going! I'm going!" he said, prancing towards the door with his long, thin legs. "See you later, lover."
Jack winked and the next second he was gone. Alex heard him outside, greeting someone. The voice he heard return his greet made his heart skip. He took a deep breath and watched as Tay sprinted through the tourbus doors and up the steps into the area in which he was sat, dropping her coat on the floor and marching towards him.
~
[10 minutes earlier]
It had taken some convincing, but Tay had managed to calm Mike down. In order to prevent prevoking him even further, she'd scrambled out of his sight. She was now stood in the bitter cold, missing the hot sun which had vanished just this morning, completely out of the blue. Seems like the weather was copying her feelings. Bitter cold weather for her bitter cold emotions.
Tay was mad, she clenched her jaw and balled her fists in the pockets of the duffle coat she'd slung on in her hurry out the door. She sighed, the guys were being ridiculous. She knew they were just being protective, but they were blowing the whole thing out of proportion a bit. She didn't even sleep with him! I wish I did she thought, atleast then they'd have a legitimate reason to be mad at me!
A bitter and selfish idea suddenly popped into her mind. If everyone thought she'd slept with Alex already, then what's she got to lose by actually doing it? From what she'd experienced, he was a lot of fun and very, for lack of a better word, skilled... so why not? Tay shook her head, frowning at her thought, before noticing she was subcontiously walking to Alex's bus. Tay stopped walking forward and glanced up at the sky, her thoughts drifting back to the night of the party. She remembered how good it felt, feeling him so close to her, their heartbeats banging in their cages, loudly and in sync. She remembered the way Alex had her cursing uncontrollably, and the way his lips felt against her skin. She remembered how much her clothes burned and scratched at her skin, and the way Alex's hand slid underneath them, soothing the pain and igniting her desire. But most of all she remembered how much she wanted to kiss him. She wanted to feel his soft lips against hers, moulding himself into her, turning the whole fantasy into reality and sealing the promise of his best into her mouth. She remembered how much she wanted her lips to swell due to him being too rough or too overcome by lust, and how much she wanted his to do the same. And to taste him, she wanted to taste him. She wanted to feel like every part of him was momentarily hers, and wanted him let her venture inside of him, into what she couldn't see on the outside with her lips and her mouth. Not just physically but emotionally, she wanted him to let her in. Let her taste him, taste parts of his life and kiss her in a way she would pretend was different from the rest of them. His kiss making her feel special and connected to him in a way that in that particular moment, nobody, not a single person in the whole entire world was feeling him the way she was then. She wanted him to mutter into her lips, swearing and groaning the most repulsive things, making her feel even more lust and even more overwhelmingly frustrating need to feel him closer. She wanted him to fall, no, crash into her, making her feel like the only girl in the world right then and then. Or, better yet, making her feel like there were thousands of other girls in the world, but he picked her. That's what she wanted, so much it ached in the pit of her stomach when she thought about it.
Tay groaned outwardly. Flashbacks from her dream where Alex was kissing her sped across her eyes and she stomped her foot in obvious frustration. She sighed. You've got nothing to lose., her mind taunted, and she sighed, closing her eyes and taking in a deep breath, shrugging her coat closer to her to claim any speck of warmth. She took her phone from the pockets and her fingers shook as she typed the message, though she wasn't sure whether it was because of the cold or whether she was nervous.
*I'm coming over. We need to talk.*.
Tay stared at the message, knowing she currently had no intention for words. She was stood outside the tourbus, and had been for quite sometime, but she didn't want Alex to know that, so she just stood there in the cold, waiting for the appropriate time to knock. Her mind danced all the possibilties of what was about to come. Sex doesn't mean anything, it reasoned, especially when it's with someone like Alex Gaskarth. Before she could knock, the heavy, black door swung open, noisily. A handsome, skunk haired man jumped out, a grin plastered on his face. It grew when he saw her.
"Hello, Tay." Jack said, grinning. Tay scowled back, she still didn't like him.
"Hi." she said bluntly. Jack glanced towards the bus and smiled. His smile wasn't suggestive or flirty, it was friendly, and Tay wondered whether Alex had told him to back off or something. The look in his eyes gave off the impression that Tay wasn't 'his' to flirt with, and for some reason, that made Tay feel brighter inside.
"Have fun." he said, smiling and skipping off. Tay watched him for a second, distracted from her previous thoughts. Then she remembered. Alex. Sat there. On his own. What if he thought it meant something? What if it did mean something? Tay frowned. It didn't mean anything and she would make sure Alex knew that.
Tay couldn't leap onto the bus fast enough. She used her whole strength the slam the door behind her, flicking the latch which locked the door from the inside out. She sighed and marched up the stairs. She saw him straight away, and tossing her coat on the floor, she strided over and sat on his lap, her legs fastening around his waist and her lips attaching themselves to his neck. Tay wanted to kiss his lips, but after last time, she was too afraid to make the first move. She hoped he'd get the hint.
"T-Tay... what are you d-doing?" Alex stuttered, breathily. Tay looked up, meeting his eyes. They were clouded over and suggestive, and Tay wanted to scream right there and then. Her eyes flickered to his lips and she noticed his hands hover over her thighs, barely making contact with the skin but just enough to send shivers up her spine. His hands flicked round and settled on the bottom of her back.
"What have we got to lose?" She whispered, in what she tried to make her most seductive voice. A smirk played the corner of his lips and Tay imagined kissing it away. Alex looked convinced. "I want to do this."
"The bet..." he whimpered as Tay tugged at the bottom of his shirt, pulling it over his head. Her hands rested on his chest, moving with it as it rapidly rose and fell due to Alex's panting. Tay's eyes smiled but her lips remained a hard line.
"This doesn't have to mean anything," she lied. Her body contrasted with her mind because Tay knew, one hundred and ten percent, that this meant everything to her. She needed this. "It doesn't mean I'm in love with you. You have sex with girls all the time and it doesn't mean you're in love with them. I don't lose anything."
Alex used his nose to knock Tay's chin up, his lips tracing her throat until he reached the pool at the bottom, he kissed, hard, and Tay's breath hitched.
"How many times do I have to tell you you're not like other girls?"
Tay was about to protest, but Alex had already been convinced. His lips were working her neck and Tay was panting, unsure of whether this was a bad idea and if her body could copy with the way Alex made her feel. Her hands dug into his hair, and she was surprised by how soft it was. She tugged and Alex whimpered against her neck, pulling away and looking up till his eyes met hers. Both of them were breathing heavily and Alex leaned up, brushing his lips against Tay's. Her heart yelped as she thought he was going to kiss her, but he just hovered his lips next to hers, trying to even his breath. His fingers started the torturous circle rubbing slowly at the base of her back.
"Are you drunk?" he panted, his eyes examining hers. Tay couldn't help but giggle and Alex smiled too. Alex curved his fingers so his nails were gently scraping her back as he swirled his fingers round in circles.
"No," Tay whispered, wishing he would just kiss her. "I'm not."
The answer was good enough for Alex and his hands slid under her legs, lifting her as he stood up, taking her towards his bunk. He took a detour, pushing her against the wall instead of going straight for the bed. Tay ran her fingers through her hair and down his neck as he roughly kissed her chest, rocking back and forth into her. Tay wanted to watch him work his magic, but every time she opened her eyes, Alex pushed into her, making her head loll back and her eyes slam shut as she practically begged for release. Alex moved his hands from under her and pressed himself against her so she wouldn't fall to the floor through the gap between Alex and the wall that she had made. Tay squeezed her legs even tighter around Alex's hips, feeling the prominent bones pressing into her thighs. Alex reached up, taking her hands from around his neck and threading them with his own, trapping them above her head on the wall. Tay could feel his palms sweating and she squeezed tighter, holding on as he began the painfully pleasurable rocking again. Tay wanted to yell, and if that wasn't bad enough, she groaned as he crashed his lips onto her pulse spot, nipping and sucking roughly. Tay was so overwhelmed, she didn't even know where to focus. Should she focus on his mouth, working her neck, slowly forming a bruise which burned her skin and reflected in her stomach as her muscles tightened and clenched in reaction? Or his hips, slowly rocking back and forth, torturing her? Or even his hands, squeezing gently every time he leaned into her, his sweaty palms gripping support like he was the one who needed it...
His hands dropped hers and he placed them on his hips, pushing her and guiding her as she met his hips, swearing under his breath every time their hips met. Tay slapped her hand down onto his bare chest, sliding them up to his shoulders, grasping for support. She dug her fingernails into his back and his head dropped as he became unable to focus on kissing her any more. He rested his head on her shoulder, panting as their hips rocked, before his legs started bucking at the knees. He quickly slipped his hand underneath her and swiftly strode towards the bunk, and before Tay knew it, she was pinned underneath him.
Alex pulled her shirt above her head and kissed everywhere but her lips. Tay felt the familiar aching need as her lips begged for his attention. He used his thumb to stroke her lips, and Tay caught it between her teeth, biting down. Alex yanked it away and a smirk played his lips as he leaned down, kissing the corner of her mouth gently. Even that made Tay want to scream. She bucked her hips up into him and he pushed down against her until she was pinned back down on the bed, unable to move. Tay heard Alex let out a quiet laugh as he kissed her jawline and she squirmed, biting on her lips hard.
"A-Alex... p-p-please."
Alex understood immediately and shook his head against her neck, moving down and kissing her collarbones, his tongue rolling across them and nipping at the skin. Tay felt tears of frustration sting her eyes, and her head shot sideways, burying into the pillow. Alex was now kissing her cleavage, his hands cupping either side of her chest. Tay squealed and the tears in her eyes were now rolling down her face. She could taste blood on her lips from biting so hard, and her back was curved into Alex. He slipped his hands and rested them on the curve of her back, sliding his hands down his waist from the top of her stomach to the bottom. He stopped rocking and leaned up, examining her face. Tay caught his glance and watched him warily. He looked worried.
"What's wrong?" he panicked, using his thumb to wipe away one of the tears on her face. Tay practically collapsed on the pillow, panting and shaking her head. "Did I do something wrong? Did I hurt you?"
Tay shook her head frantically and Alex's expression became even more panicked. He jumped off her, standing next to the bunk and shaking his head.
"Did you want to do that? Oh my god, Tay I'm so sorry... I-I didn't know. I thought you wanted to... I thought... I..."
"NO!" Tay yelled, louder than she expected. Alex jumped. She sat up and twisted herself to face with all the strength she had. She was on her knees, the bedding of the bunk now crumpled around her feet. Tay reached for him, wrapping her arms around his neck pulling him closer. He was stood up and she was kneeling and they were the same height for once. Tay leaned into him so their bare stomachs were pressing against each other, Tay feeling some of his hair tickling her stomach. Alex seemed to relax and pressed his forehead to hers, resting his hands on her waist again. "Nothing's wrong."
"Why were you crying?" he whispered, closing his eyes and breathing in her scent. Alex's heart was beating so fast and he never wanted to let Tay go in this moment. He'd never felt like this about anyone before, and he knocked his nose with hers, both of them smiling in unison. Tay closed her eyes as well.
"I was frustrated."
"Why?"
"Because you weren't kissing me."
"Yes I was."
"On the lips."
Tay expected Alex to freak out but he didn't. He just stayed there, breathing deeply and pressing his forehead to hers. It seemed like forever before he spoke.
"Why do you want me to kiss you?" He whispered, opening his eyes. Tay kept her eyes closed and he watched her, bemused. She shrugged and that's when Alex knew. She loved him too. He wanted to tell her about his feelings but stopped himself just incase he freaked her out. Tay laughed and he felt her exhale through her nose. He breathed in heavily through his, trying to take in every part of her he could catch.
"It sounds so dumb." she said, opening her eyes. When she saw Alex was watching her she blushed and Alex couldn't help but smile. She was so cute.
"It's not." he said. Tay smiled in appreciation and Alex shut his eyes again, Tay following slowly. She couldn't bear to look at him anymore. He was torture in himself. "It's just... I don't... I don't want our first kiss to be during sex. If I ever do... I want it to be special."
Tay sighed.
"We're not having sex right now..." she said, suggestively. Alex laughed and Tay smiled at the sound.
"No, you're right. We're not."
It was silent for a second, and Tay dropped her head, burying it into his chest. Alex let go of her waist and used his forefinger to knock her chin so she looked up. As she did, he slid his hands either side of her face, knotting his fingertips into her hair. He used his thumb to stroke her cheek gently, before leaning in and pressing his lips to hers gently at first, but slowly the pressure increased. The kiss lasted five seconds at most, but Tay's insides exploded. It was just a peck on the lips but butterflies took flight in her stomach and her hands grasped her tummy in shock. Alex glanced down, before taking her hands in his, stroking her knuckles with his thumb.
"Did you get butterflies?" He asked, avoiding eye contact. Tay blurted out the answer without even thinking.
"Yes."
Alex smiled the biggest smile she'd ever seen him do, and he looked up, meeting her eyes. Alex bit down on his lip and grinned at her, and she smiled back.
"Me too," he whispered, his eyes dancing with delight. He squeezed her fingers with his palms. "Me too."