Forgive Me

"Be good, Elijah."

I said kissing the top of his head before watching him run into the classroom towards his friends.
I smiled and walked out to my car.

Once I walked into the salon Bethany ran over.

"We have a major situation!" She yelled.
"What is it?" I se tmy things behind the front counter.
"It's Tina, she needs her make-up done for her wedding. Pronto!"
"Okay, send her in. I only have like three today."
"Sweet! Ever you are a freaking Life Saver!!"

I smiled shaking my head.
She was always so full of life and hyper.
How she cut hair, I had no idea.
An hour later Tina walked in looking tired as hell.
I got her to sit and relax.

"Just relax. Now are you doing natural? A certain color?"
"Natural but could you add some light blue in?"
"Definitely. Anything for the Bride To Be."

She smiled as I went to work.
I brushed on the last color of light blue eyeshadow and turned her around to face the mirror.
She gasped and got closer to the mirror.
She then looked at me smiling bigger than ever.

"Thabk you so much, Ever!!"
"Hey, it's no problem. I love doing wedding make-up."

She slipped a twenty in my pocket before hugging me.
I hugged back and she went to get her hair fixed into its curly updo.
I cleaned my station before waiting for my next customer.

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"Mommy! Mommy!!" Elijah screamed running to me hugging my leg.
"What's wrong, Buddy?"
"Theres a big scary spider!!"

I bent down and picked him up walking into his room.

"Where at?"

He pointed to the corner and there sat the biggest damn wolf spider i'd ever seen.
I walked out and sat him down on the couch before grabbing the phone.

"Ever."
"Can you come over?"
"Yeah, what's wrong?"
"So I can't be super mom all the time. There is the biggest wolf spider i've ever seen in Eli's room. I can't get it...."

He chuckled.

"Be over in five. Tell Eli you're sending super man over."
"He'll love that."

We said goodbye before hanging up.

"Eli, guess who's coming to save us??"
"Daddy?"

Shit. Didn't think he'd say that...

"Yes. But he's also Super Man!"

His little crystal blue eyes widened and he smiled.

"REALLY?!?!"
"Yeah!! He's coming over now!"
"I can't wait to show him all my super man toys!! Maybe he can teach me to be strong and be brave!!"

I smiled at him.

Sure enough five minutes later there was a knock on the door.
I opened the door and let a Super Man through.
Brent literally was dressed in a Super Man outfit...
Once he walked in Eli's room Eli lost it.
He was so happy.
"Where's the big bad spider, Eli?"
"It's over there, Super Man!!"

After Brent saved the day they played in Eli's room for a good two hours.

"Boys, dinner's ready!" I yelled.

They both walked in smiling.
Brent was dressed normally now.
We sat at the table as I gave Eli his spaghetti.

"Mommy, daddy says he's Super Man at night but daddy during the day!"
"Really?"
"Yeah! And can he sleep over?? Pwease?????"

I thought about this.
He could keep Eli occupied.

"Yes, baby, he can."
"Thank you, Mommy!!"

I smiled and kissed the top of his head before grabbing myself some food.
We all sat at the table eating and laughing when Brent had a noodle on his chin.
He was such a good dad...
If only he hadn't left...

Soon after they were back in Eli's room while I cleaned up the kitchen and dishes.
Once I was done I walkd into Eli's room.
They were playing with his cars.

"VROOM! VROOM VROOM! MOVE OUT OF THE WAY MR!!" Eli yelled.

"Elijah."

He looked up at me.

"Time for your bath."
"But mommy!!"
"I know, you' re playing your cars but it's almost time for bed, hunny."

He groaned which made me smile.

"But I don't want to go to school...."
"I know. I don't want to go to work but I have to."
"That's different. You don't have to learn anything."
"Yes I do. I learn things every day."

He looked up at me surprised.

"You do?"
"Yes. Plus you get to see Tyler and Cameron."
"Okay. I'll get a bath..."
"That's my boy." I smiled as he stood up and walked into the bathroom.

I turned the water on warm and plugged the tub so no water got out.
I helped Eli take his clothes off and he got in the tub.
I wet his hair down and started shampooing it.

"Mommy, daddy says he loves you. Do you love him?"

That question caught me off guard...

"He did?" I asked.
"Yeah. He says he wants us to be a family."

The things a child would say. It's amazing.

I cleaned the shampoo out if his blonde curly hair before putting conditioner into it.

"Do you want us to be a family?" He asked.
"Of course, Elijah. It's just hard."
"Why?"
"Because he hasn't been here."
"He's here now. He's the best daddy in the world. Better than Travis."
"You won't have to worry about Travis, baby. He's not coming back."
"Good. I only want my daddy and you nobody else."

I smiled and finished cleaning him up before unplugging the tub and wrapping him in a towel.
We walked into his room as I dried him off.
I helped him into his spiderman underwear and pjs.
I picked him up and set him in his bed.

"Mommy?"
"Yes, Eli?"
"Will you and daddy ever love eachother again?"

These questions were making me appauled.
Such serious questions from a five year old...

"I think we will, baby. Not get some sleep."

I kissed his head before tucking him in and closing his door quietly.
I walked into the livingroom and sitting by Brent.

"Did you mean it?"

I looked at him confused.

"When you told Eli you thought we'd love eachother again."

A blush settled on my cheeks. As I looked at the blank tv screen.
I looked at him.

"Yes...." I whispered.

He smiled and took my hand in his.

"I want us to work out not only for Eli but for us. I am so sorry i havent been here, Ever. I really wish I hand't missed five years of my kid's life. I wish I hadn't missed five years of your life when I could've been here. I should've been therr when he was born. To hold your hand. To hold him for the first time. To tell you what a great job you did. To tell you how much I love you. I'm so terribly sorry I wasn't. I'm here now, though. I'm not going anywhere. I want to be here."

I didn't know what to say.
I wanted to so bad give in but I still didn't trust him.
Instead I leaned over and kissed his cheek.

"I stil lneed to earn your trust again before anything happens."

He smiled.

"So where am I sleeping?"

I thought about this.
I hated to have anyone sleep on the damn couch.
That was just torture.
I sighed.

"With me. I wont have you sleeping on this couch."
"Okay. Fine by me."
"No monkey business." I glared at him.

He held his hands up i defense.

"I promise."

I smiled and turned around to go to the bedroom.

"Make yourself at home. I'll be in the shower."

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After we both showered I got into bed with him.
He laced his arms around me and pulled me close.
I missed this.
Having this safe feeling.
Being in his arms again.
I couldn't help but lace our fingers together.
Once I did that he kissed the back of my neck.
I tried so hard not to kiss him...
So hard...
I didn't.
I soon fell asleep.

I wanted to give in.
My heart screamed at me to give in but my head kept telling me it wasn't time.
I had to gain his trust before doing anything i'd regret.
That's just what I planned to do.