Sincerely Yours.

February 9th, 2017.

Dear Jack,
It's been a month now since I sent your first letter and I haven't gotten a single response. I don't know if you're reading them and just ignoring them or if you haven't gotten them at all but I can say for sure that I have finally given up hope on getting a reply. But guess what? That's not going to stop me from writing. This past month I've discovered that blocking out the memories and pretending the time we spent together never happened isn't the way forward. I haven't felt this alive in two years. You'll probably never be back in my life and this is the closest I can get so even if these letters are just piling up on your door step you're going to have to deal with it because I need it. I need you.
I feel almost guilty that I haven't yet addressed the reason we fell out... It seems cowardly even to me but I really don't know how to go about it. I've tried to go over it in my head a thousand times but every time it seems I end up trying to excuse myself which I know is just wrong and awful because there's just no two ways around it.. I was in the wrong. In the wrong doesn't even seem to cover it... I was unbelievably, ridiculously idiotic and fucking hell Jack, I'm on the verge of ripping my hair out right now it's so frustrating. What the shit was I thinking? It meant nothing to me and I instantly regretted it but none of that matters because I did it. I did it and I hurt you and now I'm dealing with the consequences. I'll deal with them until the day I die.
I guess since you most likely aren't reading these letters anyway and if you are there is literally no way you could hate me any more than you do right now, I should just go for it. This is my side of the story.
We were fighting that day. We always had small tiffs over stupid days but that day was different, the glint was missing from your eye that usually told me you just wanted to stop fighting and go out, that you were looking for a way to change the topic. That day all I saw in your eyes was white hot rage. I can't even remember what we were fighting over, something about my friends I think. You never felt comfortable with them, you just wanted to hang out with Zack, Rian, Matt and the crew. You thought they were no good for me and eventually I just snapped. We yelled at each other for hours and eventually I couldn't take it anymore and I left.
I called up Rian and he said he was at Tay's so I decided to head 'round there, try take my mind off things.
There was a small group of people there, we jammed and drank beer and had a generally pleasant time, I was a bit more tipsy than most people as it was when everyone started to leave eventually just leaving myself and Tay. I don't remember all that much between the point when she whipped out the bottle of Jack and waking up the next morning.

Yours sincerely,
Alex.