Seemed So Far

I was sitting in the back lounge on my computer while the boys were in the front room.

They just finished there ninth show and for the next two days, they were off. I spent most of my week with Alex, talking about things in my life. He wanted to know more about me and I was glad that he wanted to know the real me.

I was on Tumblr, scrolling threw the Garrett Nickelsen tag. I know, it was weird but I couldn't help it. Some of the pictures were really good, like the ones from different shows. I went to the tag search and typed in my name. I was nervous while it loaded up but I relaxed at the picture of garrett and I that Rian posted on Twitter a couple days ago. I smiled and continued threw the pictures. They were mostly pictures of Garrett and I or me with one of the boys.

That's when I saw it.

It was Garrett with his hand on a girls cheek and he was kissing her. It was up close like from a computer. I felt a lump grow in my throat and I read the caption. 

So glad he cheated on that bitch Marin.

My mouth was hung open. I couldn't believe it. He cheated on me and I didn't even know it. He lied to me. He didn't love me. 

I felt a tear fall down my cheek and I wiped it away quickly. I couldn't go out there and talk to him like nothing was wrong. I just couldn't. I didn't even want to look him in the eye. I put my computer down and tip-toed to the door opening it and walking into the hall, I peeked into the front and didn't see Garrett. I grabbed my small bag and stuffed my pajamas in and things that I would need. I went back into the back lounge and grabbed my computer, putting it in my bag. I grabbed my phone of the couch and slung my bag over my shoulders. 

I breathed out before I opened the door again and walked faster into the front room.

"Hey, where you going?" Kennedy asked.

I swallowed, wiping under my eyes. I said nothing and continued walking.

"Marin? What's wrong?" Garrett grabbed my wrist and stopped me, I was just about to step down the stairs and out the door but he just had to stop me.

I felt his hand on my cheek and almost hissed at him. He turned my face toward him and I felt more tears when I looked into his eyes.

"Marin, what's going on?" He tried to pull me with him but I didn't move. All the guys we're staring at me.

"Like you don't know," I whispered. I tore out of his grip and walked out the bus door, slamming it behind me. It was pouring rain but I didn't care. I cried my way over to All Time Lows bus. We hadn't left yet, they were still taking down everything.

"Marin! Wait!" I heard from behind me.

I heard his steps get closer and I was ready to run but he grabbed my arms, turning me around. I tried to get out of his grip but he held on.

"What is wrong? What did I do?" He yelled.

I looked at him, more tears falling out of my eyes. "You're a god damn coward, Garrett. Leave me alone."

"W-What?" I turned around, walking away. "Marin, stop!" I stopped and turned back around.

He walked over to me. "Just talk to me, tell me what happened."

"You fucking cheated! You cheated and you let me believe that you actually have feelings for me! You made me believe that you loved me!" I pushed on his chest. "You lied! Our whole fucking relationship was a shit faced lie! You can take all of your shit out of my house and live on the streets for all I care!" I pushed him hard one more time before running to All Time Lows bus. I tore the door open, stepping inside and locking the door behind me.

"Marin?" I looked behind me and saw Alex with a worried look. I walked up the steps and hugged him tight.

"You're soaking." He sighed. "Come on, let's get you in dry clothes." I nodded and followed him. I looked down at my feet, knowing that the guys were staring at me.

I came out of the bathroom in my pajamas and one of Alex's sweatshirts. He stood up from his bed and hugged me.

"Wanna tell me what happened?" I nodded, grabbing my computer.

We walked into the back lounge and I told him.

"He cheated, Alex. He cheated and I thought he loved me." I cried into his chest. 

"How do you know?" I moved away from him and grabbed my computer. I waited for the computer to wake up and the picture popped up onto my screen. I felt my eyes water again but I didn't let them slip.

I looked down at my lap and heard Alex close my computer. He scooted over to me and wrapped his arms around me. I curled up to him and let my eyelids fall.