Humans, Are Such Nasty Things

"Why," I clutched Cayden's chest and fought back my tears, "Am I so pathetic? Why am I so weak?"
"You're not," He rubbed my back , "You are so strong and so kind."
"Me? Kind?" I smiled and the tears came a bit more freely.
"Yeah," He crooned gently, "Kind-hearted, and strong and beautiful - "
"And ferocious," I added.
"And ferocious," he chuckled.

I turned to the window knowing that the Cullen kids were out there, somewhere where my eyes could not see. They were watching me. Tonight was another nightmare.

No, not a nightmare but something like it. Tonight was a night terror. All I could feel was pain and fear. It was horrible. It felt like my blood suddenly turned into glass then broke and all the pieces were just tearing me apart from the inside.

"Maybe we shouldn't go out today," Cayden said wiping my tears with his large, soft hands.
"No," I sniffed shaking my head, "Paige has been looking forward to this movie. She even got better from her really bad cold. I couldn't deny her that."
"See?" He kissed my forehead, "Kind."

I smiled. Cayden was staying with me this for a while, He was a bit short on rent last month so they kicked him out till he could pay the full for this month and the last. Tonight was our last night together.

"I'll get you some water," He gave me a quick kiss and went downstairs. I ran to the window. They were already there.

"Dang girl!" Emmet said, "You're alone with your boy and he still hasn't gone at it!"
"He isn't a pig like you Emmet!" Rosalie appeared.
"Aww! You know you love me!" He pinched her cheek.
"But seriously though," Rosalie said, "Are you fine?"
"Of course not," I scoffed.
She looked on me.
"But, something like that isn't going to stop me," I said, "I'll make it through it all. I'll survive all the bad things."

The cold air felt amazing. It was invigorating.

"But you don't have to go through it all alone sweetie," Esme said.
"You have us," Carlisle reinforced what she said.
"That's true, but to me," I said without really thinking, "I feel like I'm being weak, depending on others. I know I'll crumble, if I didn't have someone to support me and that fact, just, makes me hate myself even more."
"Don't say that!" Rosalie reached in and rubbed my hair, "If someone love you truly, they'll stay with you no matter what! You shouldn't hate yourself for something so silly!"
"I know but," I felt sad all over again, "Why should I have to drag someone into my problems? Why should I be so....disgraceful, that I have to depend so heavily on others who are uninvolved?"
"Isn't that just human nature," Carlisle said gently, "To rely on others."
"I thought we've long established that I'm not I human," I smiled.

"Speaking of which," I tried to change the topic, "Jasper and Alice?"
"Having fun, unlike you and Cayden," Emmet said.
"Hunting actually," Rosalie covered his mouth.
"And Edward is completely intoxicated with his little human girl," I rolled my eyes at the mental image I just got.

"Seeing as you brought her up," Esme smiled, "Would you spend the afternoon with us? don't worry, it won't cut into your movie date, it's just until Cayden gets off work."
"How comes?" I asked.
"Well she is walking into a house of vampires," Esme replied, "I'm just trying to make her not feel as uncomfortable."
"Sorry but I'm gonna have to pass on that," I said, "I don't think Bella likes me very well."

I heard Cayden's footsteps.

"Don't worry Esme, Gwen'll be there," Rosalie said, "For my sake more than Bella's" Then they all disappeared.

*******BELLA'S P.O.V**********

"Is this fine?" I came downstairs for what felt like the millionth time.
"You look so matronly in that skirt," Edward chuckled. I ran back upstairs stumbling as I a klutz would normally do.
"Honestly," Edward said, from downstairs, loud enough for me to hear, "She's walking into a house full of vampires and all she worries about is how she dresses."
"Typical woman, right?" I said coming back downstairs.
"Perfection," Edward smiled at me.

"What if they don't like me?" I asked halfway there, too late to turn back.
"They'll love you," he reassured me.
"But what if?" I worried.
"Man you're just like Gwen!" He said sending a pan in my chest, "both of you worry unnecessarily."
"What could she have to worry about?" I asked, trying to keep the ice out of my voice.
"Oh, no one told you?"
I shook my head.

"Well her sister is here in Forks," He explained with a slightly uninterested voice, "she's really sick in her bones and immune system. She has bad asthma too and a tragic incident left her blind when she was younger."
"How?" I asked.
"It's psychosomatic. She saw her mother's death and every since then she's shut off her sight."
"Wow. What about Gwendelyn's father?"
"Well that person who died wasn't her mother. Gwen's adopted. We really don't know much of her past from before she was adopted. Her adopted father though went mad after his wife died. He drank all the time and Gwen was the one who had to take care of the house and her sister, Nandaleah, who was in the hospital. It's seemed pretty rough for her. Because of her eyes, she was bullied a lot too. She even used to cut."
"I would have never known." I said.

Her life was sad. Far more sad than mine. But still, I could never forgive her for touching my Edward like that. She's mental obviously. But she isn't as strong as she puts out. She's probably cracked on the inside. I find it my duty, after she touched Edward, to make her break completely. Then, and only then will she leave us alone. And when Edward sees how absolutely pathetic she is, he won't love her anymore. He'll love me alone. No one else. Just me.

I walked in the house. It was deep i the forest. It was beautiful and calm. The house was so white that I would of course notice the red dog collar around her neck. Again, Gwendelyn was interfering

"Oh," Edward said nonchalant, "I didn't know she'd be here."
"Shhh!" Alice hushed him..
"Bella!" Esme came up to me yet kept her distance, "We've been waiting for you!"
"Um - hi - er- good afternoon," I stuttered already making myself look like a fool.
"No need to be so formal," Carlisle looked on me gently, "We already consider you as family. Right, Rose?"
Rosalie mumbled something that made Esme roll her eyes.

I looked at her and her beauty. She was like a perfect statue carved my Michelangelo from Greek marble. I looked an Alice in her fun cuteness. She was also a perfect being that made me feel inferior. She wasn't as god-like as the rest of her family. She was more like a fairy. Between the two was Gwendelyn looked as if she fell asleep sitting up.

If I thought that she was a doll before, I could not even describe her now. Her light pink lips barely parted. Her small head slightly tilted to Alice's side. Her dark brown hair was between Rosalie's marble fingers as she styled it. Her eyes close in a deep slumber. Her eyelashes dark against her pale ivory skin. Her dress looked dainty and flowing on her and her small hands, folded gently on a book in her lap. Her face was blank, calm, expressionless, doll-like. Yes, she was by far more lovelier that I.

"We started cooking if you want something," Esme said.
"I already -" I began to say when someone's voice rang out.
"Food?" Gwendelyn said sleepily rubbing her eyes.
"Don't move!" Rosalie commanded.
"You'll mess up all our hard work!" Alice chimed, her voice like bells.
"Huh?" Gwendelyn touched the red collar on her neck as if she was confused. She rolled her eyes.
"Christ Emmet," she sighed, "Get this thing of me already!"
"Nope!" Emmet jumped from behind the couch holding a leash, almost giving me a heart attack.
"Tch! whatever," She waved him off, "Now, I thought I heard something about food."

"Well yes," Esme smiled motherly at her and much more gently than she smiled at me, "I had planned for you and Bella to eat -"
"Bella?" Her eyebrows came together, she turned to me, "Oh Bella. Afternoon."
"Good Afternoon." I whispered back to her.

"Bella actually ate already," Edward said.
"Hnnm," Rosalie lifted her eyebrows.
"So it would be fine if I had your share then?" Gwen asked me, "Emmet and Rose practically dragged me out of the house before I could eat anything." So, she calls Rosalie 'Rose' huh?
"Well it would be disrespectful if I made Esme go cook for me and didn't eat," I said quickly.
Gwendelyn looked on me and nodded in satisfaction, as if she expected me to do something like that.

"It was no trouble at all," Esme said, "There really is no need to force yourself."
"It's fine," I said looking at Gwendelyn with blatant hate. She stared back at me with a smirk.
"Heh!" Rosalie chuckled to herself as if this whole thing was quite amusing to her.

Alice ran up to the door to meet Jasper who came from somewhere. He gave her a quick kiss on the cheek.
"What's with this hateful air?" He whispered to her.
"No idea," she said back, "I'll ask later."
Suddenly, I was met by a certain calm. Everything felt at ease. How?

"Jasper can control emotions remember?" Edward said to me.
"Are you sure you can't read my mind?" I said to him smiling slightly.

*******GWENDELYN'S P.O.V*********

"It kinda went like 'I know what you are,' " I said in a falsetto voice then switched to a gruff voice, " 'Say it, out loud' " then back to the falsetto, " 'Vampire'."
"You're joking." Alice said to me, the leaves crunching under her feet.
"Nope. I'm totally serious." I nodded.

It was about time for me to get ready to go to the movies with Cayden and Paige, and Alice was walking with me back home even though it was a bit of a walk. I felt really good about it. They were pretty cool people, for humans. Jamie had ran away with his boyfriend over the Christmas and Mary had abandoned me for a group of semi-popular kids at the school who really didn't like me to that. I realize that Mary wasn't as good as a person as I thought. She was a human. Cayden and Paige were non-humans.

"So why does she dislike you?" Alice asked jumping over a stone.
"Well, Edward carried me down the tree bridal style," I said, "That was the first thing."
"He did not!" Alice face-palmed.
"I know he's an idiot," I said, "Did he not think that she'd get jealous?"
"And what else?" Alice asked.
"I think the other thing was when I slapped him across the face,"
Alice snickered.
"She looked on me like a just drowned puppies or pissed on a grave or something," I rolled my eyes.
"Is that it?"
"Nah," I shook my head, "I think the real thing that set her off was when Edward said he loved me."

"Come again?!" Alice jumped in front of me all smiles.
" 'Edward, do you love her?' " I mimicked Bella.
" 'Of course I do,' " I mimicked Edward, "That almost killed her let me tell you that. Then he said, 'She's like a sister to me.' But Bell didn't hear that. She was probably too busy creating her own thoughts "
"The fool," Alice shook he head. I was tempted to ask who she was talking about but instead I continued to tell her what Edward said.

"Oh Edward you dumbass!" Alice flew her head back, "Spend night talking to each other, visiting each other! Of course the poor girl would get jealous!"
"She shouldn't be jumping to all these conclusions though," I said.
"Yes well," Alice said, "Not everyone can think as calmly and rationally as you Gwen." We were at my house.
"See you Alice," I waved.
"Later," She winked and vanished.

*****************

"PARTY PEOPLE!" Paige said during intermission in reference to the movie. She was sporting a lime-green colour hairstyle this week.
"Should you really be pushing your body that much?" Cayden said helping her get to her seat.
"I'm fine bro!" she pulled on his cheeks, "R.S, you on the other hand, have been EXTREMELY quiet!"
"Don't mind me," I sipped my soda, "I just, have this uneasy feeling."
"It's a night out!" Paige shook my shoulders, "Go crazy! Have fun! Make out with Cayden while I pretend not to be totally grossed out!"
"Ha ha ha," I said monotonously,hoping it would hide my blush.
"You look like a tomato!" Paige dug her fingers in my cheeks.

"Was it about what happened last night?" Cayden whispered in my ear.
"Er - um- no," I stammered.
"Are you sure?" He said rubbing my hands sending electricity through my veins.
"Positive!" I said a bit too quickly. He smiled gently at me. He leaned in and our lips connected. It felt so soft and warm. He held my face between his large hands and I never felt so loved my my life. When we broke apart, he ran his fingers through my hair.

"Be happy." he said to me.
"Yeah," I said back.

Throughout the movie I was pretty happy. Cayden was beside himself in pride at the fact that a Muse song, 'Bliss' was used as the BGM when Milla Jovovich was riding her motorcycle to the bad guy in the movie. Paige and I high-fived each other when the credits rolled by and a My Chemical Romance song 'This Is How I Disappear' played.

I was just about drunk with happiness. Even as I kissed Cayden goodbye I felt overjoyed. I looked at the clock in my Jag. 1:17am. Well fuck. I thought as fatigue finally hit me. It was a strange feeling. My body was aching and yet I was so at peace.

I threw my coat on the coat hanger when beside the door. I ran upstairs and took a short cold shower. The night was unusually warm I put on a camisole and a plaid pyjama shorts. I jumped straight into bed.

***************

RING!
RING! RING!
For the love of.....
RING! RING! RING!
I looked on my nightstand. 1:53am. Jesus.
RING! RING! RING! RING! RING!
I picked up my phone, "Hello,"
"Gwen! Thank God I got you!"
"Car-lisle," I said sleepily and couldn't control my bad-words, "What the fuck? It's two in the goddamn morning! What's going on?!"
"Come quick!" He said, not paying attention to the profane language I used, "I'm at the hospital! Nandaleah's -"

"What about Nandaleah?!" I jumped up, all in serious alertness. I slid my feet in my bed-slippers.
"She had a stroke!" he said, "We need you to come immediately." He said. By this time I was already downstairs. I grabbed my car keys, my purse and I was in my night-clothes and grabbed only the trench coat I had on earlier.
"I'm already in the Jag!" I said not even taking the two seconds to fasten my seatbelt, "I'll be there in three minutes."
"Gwen don't be reckless! You can't get here within three minutes without breaking the speed limit!"
"Carlisle," I said already on the road, "Don't give me that."

"Where is she?!" I bust into the hospital and looked on the nurse who was on duty, I haven't seen her before, "Nandaleah Bright! Where is she?"

"Visiting hours are over," she said not looking up from her magazine.
"Screw that!" I tore the magazine from her hands.
"Look girl-!" She began.
"No! You look!" I grabbed her by the collar and stared her dead in the eye, "I have very short temper and I swear to God if you piss me off anymore than I already am, I'll fucking end you. Tell me where Nandaleah Bright is or tell me where Dr. Carlisle Cullen is!"

She trembled and I noticed that her finger was pressing on something. Suddenly, two pairs of large, muscley arms grabbed me.

"No!" I screeched as they ripped me from the nurse. I struggled and tried to twist myself free. I thrashed around screaming at them.

"SEDATE HER!" I heard someone yell. Then I saw Carlisle coming out of the elevator.
"CARLI-!" I started. I felt a dull pain in my thigh, then everything went black.

********************

"Guh," I groaned getting up.
"She's awake!" Emmet beamed.
"Really?" Rosalie said, "So the effect of sedatives is considerably shorter on her then,"
"Where am I?" I looked around.
"The hospital," Edward said.
"Oh it's you," I rubbed my head, "I feel so heavy."
"Sedatives will do that to you," Alice chuckled.
"Hey, it's Alice," I said somewhat stupidly.

"Jeez Gwen!" Emmet threw his hands up, "You should have seen yourself. You were like an animal. Thrashing all about the place. Screaming like that. Raising all types of hell!"
"Me?" I said trying to collect my memories.
"Duh!" Emmet said, "It could only be you."

"Nandaleah!" I said remembering why I was here. I jumped of the bed too quickly and could not stay on my feet.
"Easy there," Edward and Alice helped me back in to bed.
"I need to see her!" I tried to struggle free but my body had no energy in it whatsoever.
"She's fine." Rosalie assured me, "She's alseep now. Carlisle is monitoring her. And Esme and Jasper are there too. No need to worry."
"If you say so," I rubbed my eyes.

"More importantly," Emmet said, "I thought you were a good girl! what on earth are you doing with tattoos?"
"My coat, is gone," I looked on my exposed shoulders, "They're not tattoos."
"Liar Liar pants on fire!" Emmet said.
"They're not tattoos!" I said a bit more loudly.
"Then what are they?" Alice asked.
"These," I said, "Are the cruel, eternal branding of my past."
"Before you were adopted?" Emmet asked something close to gentle.
"Yeah," I nodded.
"Will you tell us?" Rosalie asked.

I don't know what it was. The morphine making me more compliant or the gently way in which they spoke to me. I don't know what it was, but something, made me tell them all about my past.