Because You're the Only Hope For Me

POV: Gerard
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This is really irritating. Frank and I haven't had any 'romantic encounters' since Jamia has moved in. The closest Frank and I have gotten is just a hug. Jamia has started working in 'Hot Topic' and is earning a basic wage. She has paid barely any of her rent and Frank and I have offered her money but she simply won't take it. She's getting quite flirty with Frank and he isn't resisting. It's quite upsetting actually. My plan is to keep as far away from Frank as I can because I can't bear to see any of us getting hurt. I love Frank and I think he loves me back. I keep getting these urges towards Frank every time he giggles, which means I have to run to the bathroom more-or-less every time he starts laughing. In a way he is replacing the drink and drugs and becoming my addiction.

"Hey Gee can we talk a sec?" asked a concerned looking Frank.
"Uh, sure." replied Gerard bluntly.

Frank then led me into his back yard and then into his garage. I was getting a bit suspicious but just went along with it.

"So uh, y'know what happened before Jamia moved in," asked Frank awkwardly.
"Yeah." replied Gerard.
"Well uh, I feel like uh, I don't know how to say this" said a nervous Frank.
"C'mon just spit it out!" shouted Gerard.
"Keep it down would you! Okay what I am trying to say is that I want to do it again. I loved it. I had never felt a pleasure like that. I mean when Jamia and I would have sex it would never be a pleasurable as that." said Frank grinning.
"Oh. I loved it too. But how are we supposed to y'know do it with Jamia constantly around?" asked a confused Gerard.
"Well I've thought of that and I've came up with a plan." replied Frank.
"And that is?" asked Gerard.
"Okay, so Jamia is out everyday between the hours 2 and 6 to go to work, which would give us 4 hours to ourselves. In those four hours we could have plenty of you know what and she wouldn't have to find out." replied a devious Frank.
"That actually sounds like a pretty good idea. I'm up for it anyway." replied a happy Gerard.
"Great so it's set. Now it's half twelve and sooner or later Jamia will be off to work. We should probably get back in to avoid any suspicion." said Frank pleased with Gerard's reply.

Once we were back inside we returned to our normal selves and acted naturally, trying our best to hold in our excitement. I couldn't believe what was going to happen in a matter of hours. I would have a sexual encounter for the first time in 2 weeks again with the man of my dreams. This is starting to feel some what normal. We both enjoy it, so no harm done.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jamia has left for work
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Yes we are finally alone!" said an excited Frank.
"I know, I have literally been counting down the hours and minutes until we can finally do this again!" replied Gerard grinning.

We then made our way into Frank's room and started to remove our clothing. I had butterflies in my stomach and my heart was racing even faster than the first time we had done this. We started to make out and touch each other. The hairs on my spine stood up and my body was filled with sexual pleasure.

"I can't believe that this is actually happening. It feels like it was so long ago since we had sex" said Frank.
"I know. Lets just hope this all goes to plan and we can do this regularly without anybody getting hurt." replied a cautious Gerard.
"Ah don't worry about it. It's none of Jamia's business what we do in our spare time anyway." replied a calm Frank.
"Wait. Before this goes any further can I ask you a question?" asked Gerard.
"What is it with you and the questions during sex? Go on what is it?" replied Frank.
"Well I don't know if I'm being paranoid when I'm saying this but do you think that Jamia might still have feelings for you?" asked a sad looking Gerard.
"What? Well she is kinda being a bit flirty but I don't think she necessarily still loves me." asked Frank trying to verge off of the subject.
"Yeah, you're probably right. Anyway where were we?" Gerard replied.

Frank grinned and then almost instantly started giving me a handjob. Frank's handjobs are indescribable. His hands are so soft and he knows where my pleasure spot is. I wonder if he is into the more erotic side of things. I don't know if that would be too awkward though. I mean this is only the second time we have done this. I'll keep my mouth closed anyway and see where it goes from here. The main thing is that he stays mines.

"So Mr.Way. It appears that I am doing all of the work here. A switch of roles might be nice?" asked Frank in an ever so sexy voice.
"That is true Mr. Iero. I'll go grab some protection and I will pleasure you." said Gerard while getting out of bed to go grab some condoms.
As I approached the bathroom I found that the box of condoms was empty. I turned around the box and on the back written was:

I have saved you the effort of disposing of these yourself.
I am pretty sure that you will not be needing these anytime soon.
If you ever do need them however just ask me, I have a let’s say ‘secret stash’.
Gerard he needn’t know about this eh?
-XO Jamia
PS: I am trying to hint at something

I fucking knew it! She does still love him. I am planking this. No way am I going to let her steal Frank away from me. 'Gerard he needn't know about this eh?' who does she think she is?! She needs to get it into her head that Frank does N-O-T L-O-V-E her. Well at least I hope that he doesn't.

"Gee you alright in there?" shouted a concerned Frank.
"Uh yeah. Slight problem though, no protection left" replied a hesitant Gerard.
"What the fuck? There was a fucking box load this morning. I fucking made sure of it. Wait a sec I'll come in and-" replied a pissed off Frank.
"No! D...d...don't come in, I'm uh peeing!" shouted back Gerard
"Gee. We were just about to have sex, do you really think that seeing you pee is gonna put me off coming in there?" replied Frank.

Shit. What am I gonna say now? Where the fuck will I put this. I'll just shove it in the linen basket.

"Haha, yeah what was I thinking." replied a flustered Gerard.
"Ahh now let me see. Did you check the bathroom cabinet?" asked Frank.
"Yup. Nothing in there, not even the box." replied Gerard, keeping his eye on the basket.
"That's really fucked up. I can't see Jamia taking them. Well that's our plans ruined I guess." replied an annoyed Frank.

I then remembered about my love-box condom packet.

"Wait! I think I might have one!" Gerard replied, while running into Frank's bedroom.
"Great!" replied a hopefull Frank.

By luck, there was indeed a condom in my jean pocket. Don't ask I always keep a spare.

"Got it! Get back in here Frankie!" replied a happy Gerard.
"Awesome!" replied Frank running into his bedroom.

Once we were in position and everything was in order we started to get into it again. I slowly started to insert my dick into Frank's ass making sure I could do it as pain-free as I could. His moans were thrilling and got me into it even more. The only downfall was that I wouldn't be getting fucked as
there was only one condom. I put that to the back of my mind along with the whole Jamia crap.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
1 hour after Frank & Gerard have 'done-it'
POV: Gerard
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Once we were all dressed and back in the living room I then remembered that the condom packet was still in the linen basket. I casually sped-walked into the bathroom and ripped up the packet as quietly as I could. I could here Frank strumming on his guitar in the living room and a small smile appeared on my face. All of a sudden I felt as if I was going to vomit. I leaped over to the toilet just in time and was infact sick.

"Gerard are you alright in there?" asked a concerned Frank.
"Uh, not really I've just puked into your toilet." replied an embarrassed Gerard.

I was mortified. Literally around 30 minutes ago I was the happiest man on earth and now I am on Frank's bathroom floor, puking into his toilet.

"I'm coming in man." replied a worried Frank.

-Gerard is sick again this time with blood and Frank enters the bathroom-

"I...I'm so sorry man, I'll clean this up." replied a teary, bloody and clearly still embarrassed Gerard.
"Don't worry about that! That's the last thing on my mind, we need to get you to hospital ASAP. Gee there is blood in your vomit, that isn't a good sign." replied an uneasy Frank.

I knew that Frank hated the smell and sight of vomit. I was really fucking scared. Blood in my vomit? I've heard that that's a sign of kidney disease, and lets be honest here my kidneys aren't exactly the best.

"Come on Gee, take my hand and I'll get you into the car. We are going to the hospital." replied Frank, trying to reassure Gerard.

-In Frank's car-

"Frank. Can I ask you something?" asked a worried looking Gerard.
"Sure man." asked a frantic Frank.
"D...do you think, this might be related to my whole drink and drugs shit?" replied very pale Gerard.
"Uh I don't know man. Just don't think like that, only the doctors can tell us. Don't worry Gee, we're almost at the hospital." replied Frank, trying to hold back tears.

I knew that Frank was as worried as I was. I was almost certain that this was related to the drink and drugs. I hadn't gone cold turkey I did the whole 'in moderation' way of things. The rehab nurses told me that within a few weeks I would be 'as good as new'. They didn't say anything else. Nothing about my long-term health, side effects e.t.c. This was some scary shit.

-Frank & Gerard are in the waiting room at the hospital-

*******************
POV: Frank
*******************

I'm used to hospitals, seeing I was in them so much as a child. Everyone could see that Gerard was very uncomfortable. We explained the situation to the receptionist and she let us go into a private room, just in case any fans were to enter. Gerard was constantly holding my hand and I never once let go. He kept asking me if he would have to get needles anywhere in his body. I couldn't give him an exact answer to any of the questions he asked me apart from one. The question with a straight forward answering question was 'Do you love me?'. I could spontaneously answer that one, in fact so quick I think that I deserve a medal.

"Hello Gerard my name is Lesley, I am a nurse here at St. Bridget's hospital now could you explain what has happened to me?" asked Lesley the nurse.
"Well uh, I had just had y'know it, with my partner and around thirty minutes after doing it I felt the need to vomit, which I did." replied an uneasy Gerard.
"Right. Did you have any substances before, after or during intercourse?" asked the nurse.
"No. But I am not long out of rehab, only a matter of weeks actually." replied Gerard.
"Ah. Okay, I take it you were in there for substance abuse?" replied the nurse, writing down on her clipboard everything Gerard was saying.
"Mhmm." replied an awkward Gerard.
"Well you just sit in here. And might I ask the name of your acquaintance here?" replied the nurse.
"My name is Frank." replied Frank.
"Okay Frank can I have a little chat with you outside? Gerard you stay here please." said the nurse looking directly at Frank.
"Sure." replied both Frank and Gerard.

The nurse then led me outside of the room and closed over the door leaving Gerard alone in the room.

"Listen, Frank. I don't mean to come across as being nosy or anything but are you Gerard's partner?" asked the nurse.
"We aren't a couple, but I am the man that he had sex with. Don't say it so loud though, this is only the second time we have done it and we don't want anybody to know okay?" replied Frank.
"Okay then. Well does Gerard lead a promiscuous lifestyle?" asked the nurse still writing away on her clipboard.
"No he certainly does not. This was only the second time he has done it this whole year." replied Frank looking slightly offended.
"Sorry if I cause any offense there. One last thing does kidney problems run in the family and how much substance was Gerard taking?" asked the nurse lifting her pen away from the clipboard.
"Not that I know of, but Gerard was a heavy drinker, light drugger and he smokes too." replied Frank.
"Okay thanks. You can go in and sit with Gerard. Also tell him to wash his hands I'm going to take a sample of blood." replied the nurse.

I headed back into the room to find Gerard lying unconscious on the chair. I ran out and grabbed the nurse. She then called for help and Gerard was lifted onto a stretcher and taken into the elevator along with me and the other nurses.

"Okay Gerard can you hear me?" asked the nurse shining a light into Gerard's eyes.

Gerard just mumbled and then frothed at the mouth. He went into a fit and just as he did the elevator doors opened. The nurses rushed him down a long corridor and straight into the first empty room there was. I ran after them making sure I was constantly by Gerard's side. I was absolutely shitting myself. They then attached Gerard to a support machine and got him back to a normal state. He was still unconscious but out of his seizure.

"Okay Frank it appears that Gerard has had a seizure of some sort, most likely shock as his right kidney appears to not be functioning fully. We have him under control at the moment. Is there anybody you would like to contact?" asked the nurse.
"Uh, um, M...Mi, Mikey. Mikey Way Gerard's brother Mikey." replied Frank crying.
"Okay there is a phone down the corridor and to the left." replied the nurse patting Frank on the shoulder.

I headed down to the phone where I punched in Mikey's mobile number. I tried to hold myself together on the phone but just as he answered I burst into tears.

"Hello? Who is this and why is it coming up caller ID unknown?" said Mikey casually over the phone.
"I...it's me Frrrank. It's Gerard, he...hhh...he's in hospital. I don't have time to explain just get here. St.Brrrridget's, West Nile Street. Y'know whhere it is." replied a blubbering Frank.
"Oh right man, I'll be there." replied Mikey quickly hanging up.

To be honest I couldn't give a damn if Mikey found out about me and Gerard. I cared more about Gerard's wellbeing at the moment and I'm pretty sure Mikey would be the same. I didn't bother letting Jamia know.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
15 minutes later & Mikey has arrived along with Ray and Bob.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Frank! Frank! What room is he in man?" shouted a stressed looking Mikey.
"Follow me!" I replied wiping away tears from my eyes.
"We got here as fast as we could. So what's happening?" asked Mikey looking very concerned.
"Well uh, he vomited and it contained blood so I brought him here, just to make sure he was okay and then he had a seizure, shock thing." replied a heavy looking Frank.
"What? How the fu- hell did that happen? Did he eat something funny? Did he take any drugs or alcohol?! Were you watching him?!" shouted Mikey looking Frank right in the eyes.
"I don't know! He took nothing! He didn't have any breakfast just coffee. I don't know I ain't a doctor so don't start trying to blame this on me!" shouted an aggravated Frank.
"Okay calm it down you two! This is the last thing anybody needs! We are all here now and Gerard is in the best place he can be okay?" replied Ray trying to be a peacemaker.

How dare Mikey try and blame this on me! All I did was have sex with him, and it was me that was being inserted into! Okay Frank just calm down. I hope that it isn't anything really bad.

"Frank. Frraank, Frrrank!" Gerard mumbled loudly.

I instantly grabbed his hand.

"Gee? Gerard? Can you hear me?!" shouted a faithful Frank.
"Frank, Frank!" Gerard mumbled again.
"Okay Frank if you could step away a second. Gerard may be regaining consciousness." replied the nurse while gently pushing Frank aside.

I sat on the chair beside the stretcher praying that he would come around. I looked carefully at the heart rate monitor and saw it display an average heart pace. That was a good sign. The nurse then shone her torch beam into Gerard's eyes. The light brought him around.

"Ouch! Get that out of my face!" shouted a bewildered Gerard.
"Gerard!" shouted Frank with a huge grin across his face.

Gerard then smiled and scanned the room looking at everyone's faces. He looked slightly confused.

"Who are these people Frank? Who are they and why am I in here?" asked a frightened looking Gerard.
"It's okay Gee, you were sick and I brought you in here remember?" said Frank.
"Oh yeah." replied Gerard nodding.
"Here is Mikey your brother, Ray your friend and band mate and Bob your friend and band mate too remember?" asked Frank looking into Gerard's confused eyes.
"Um no?" replied Gerard.
"What do you mean no? I'm your bro man! Remember me Mikey? You hut me with a lightsaber when we were kids? We have lived with each other for a long, long time?" asked a bemused Mikey.

Gerard just shook his head and reached out for my hand which I let him hold. The guys all looked at each other and me. We had no idea what was going on. The nurse told us that sometimes when somebody has just went through shock it can take them a couple of hours to regain full memory. We felt assured but still concerned. We all found it strange, including the nurses, that it was only me whom Gerard remembered. We came to a conclusion that it was because I was the last person that he was with. Mikey, Ray, Bob and the nurses all left the room to give Gerard and I some privacy.

"Hehe" replied a mischievous looking Gerard.
"What are you giggling about?" replied Frank putting on a fake smile.
"I know who they are, I'm just pretending." said Gerard giggling to himself.
"What! Gerard! That isn't funny this is serious! I need to go tell the nurse, they are probably away filing this into your medical records!" replied a serious looking Frank.

Gerard continued to giggle to himself as I went outside to get the nurse. When the nurse entered the room she gave Gerard quite a lecture. I don't blame her, I would have. The guys looked at him with no amusement. Gerard sighed and went into a huff. We all left Gerard alone and headed down out to the car park to get some fresh air, while the nurses stayed with him.

"Guys, what the fuck was that all about?" asked Bob.
"I don't know, that was not one bit funny though. I seriously did think that he forgot me!" replied an upset looking Mikey.

We all nodded in agreement.

"So now that we are all here tell us what actually happened?" asked Ray.
"I'm telling you nothing happened! He just went into the bathroom and puked, simple as that!" shouted Frank trying to sound as convincing as possible.
"Sure. Well you came out as being bi are you positive there is nothing that you would like to tell us Frank?" asked Mikey fishing for answers.
"I am positive." replied Frank firmly.
"Yeah, for lying." muttered Bob under his breath.
"What was that Bob? Come on share it with us all!" replied Frank while kicking a puddle.
"Calm it Iero! I was only joking, we believe you somewhat..." said Bob chuckling.

I couldn't hold it any longer. I launched for Bob kneeing him in the balls. Hard.

"What the fuck was that for you fucking idiot! Thanks a lot I probably won't be able to have kids now!" shouted an infuriated Bob.
"Who would want to have your genes?" replied Frank.
"Oh look at Frank turning all feisty, showing his true gay side!" replied Bob trying to get Frank even more angry.
"Fuck you, you fat fucking idiot! I'm sick of this bullshit! Do you really think I want to be attracted to guys? Of course not it fucking creeps me out! I can't fucking help it though! I am in love with a beautiful man, he means more to me than anybody else and he is all by himself in a hospital bed dying. That's right I fucking love Gerard. There I said it, are you all happy now?!" shouted Frank storming off.

All of the guys looked at each other in utter shock. I didn't know where I was going but I just kept walking. I had my phone on me anyway. I saw a pathway so I decided to walk down it to clear my head. At the bottom of the bath I spotted 2 guys sitting throwing stones into a river. It was getting quite dark now and I couldn't really see where I was going.

"You know with Mandy being in there and all there is something I really want to tell you." said one of the guys.
"What is it?" replied the second guy.
"Marvin, I love you. I have done for a long time." said the first guy.
"What? Well I'll admit I- Hey wait! Who is that guy Grant?" replied Marvin.
"Yeah who is he? Hey dude who the fuck are you?" replied the first man who appeared to be called Grant.
"Wait it's that guy, uh Frank from my chemical romance! Haha that band sucks!" replied Marvin laughing.
"Oh yeah! Haha!" said Marvin.
"Um. Our band isn't everybody's cup of tea but you don't have to be so offensive. And I can come down here all I like okay?" replied Frank getting his point across.
"Oooh, look he's getting all offensive like a big boy!" said Grant recovering from laughter.
"Yeah why don't you come down here and we can all get to know each other?" replied Marvin.
"I'd much rather not." replied Frank who was now pissed off.
"Hey listen, it wasn't an offer get down here now." demanded Grant.
"I said no." replied Frank firmly.

Just as I replied Grant grabbed me pushed me into the bushes followed by Marvin and they both began to rip off my clothes.

"What the fuck are you doing?!" shouted a fearful Frank.
"Just shut your big boy mouth and be good okay?" replied Grant smacking his lips against Frank's.

As much as I tried to move them off of me I was powerless. Before I knew it they were both using me for sex. I was being raped. The word circulated around in my head while tears ran down my face. Once they were done using me they threw my clothes into the river and ran away. I felt disgusting. My genitals were in absolute agony and my ass was killing me. I was naked and my phone was now in my jean pocket floating down the river. How was I going to get back to the guys and explain this all? I grabbed a plastic bag caught in one of the bushes and created into some underwear. I headed back up to the car park and spotted the guys. I walked over to them ashamed and disgusted about what had just happened. I was down there for about 20 minutes. I was surprised that the guys were still there.

"Ugh answer service. Bob you really shouldn't have spoke back to him like that, he's got enough on his plate at the moment. That was the last thing he needed." said Mikey looking concerned.

Bob then wolf-whistled as I approached the guys.

"Um Frank why are you naked and scratched?" asked Mikey looking disturbed.

I was speechless. My eyes were red and my body appeared to be red and covered in scratches.

"Guys this looks serious, something isn't right here. Frank are you alright?" asked Ray with a concerned expression.
"C...can wwe go intto the ccar? Jjust you and Mmikey?" replied Frank jittering.
"Sure man." replied Ray signaling to Mikey to open the car.

Once we were in the car I explained everything while non-stop crying. The guys were stunned with my revelation. They comforted me to the best of their ability but to be honest nothing could. Between the whole Gerard shit, Jamia moving in and now this my brain quite literally ached. Mikey fetched me some clothes and I got changed in the back seat. We all went back into the hospital and said our goodbyes to Gerard and headed home. Bob did not speak to me for the full journey, he didn't know about what happened. Mikey and Ray offered to stay with me but I politely reclined and explained that Jamia had moved in. Shit I forgot about Jamia. I headed out of the car and into my house to find Jamia watching my T.V.

"Hey Frank!" shouted Jamia gleefully.
"Hey Jamia." replied Frank bluntly.
"Are you okay? Why were you gone and where is Gerard?" asked Jamia.

Oh yeah. I forgot I hadn't explained the situation to her. SHIT WHAT IF SHE HAD BEEN INTO THE BATHROOM.

"Uh Gerard took unwell and that is why the bathroom is a mess. Listen I'm quite tired and today has been lets say eventful. So I'm gonna go straight to bed. Night." replied Frank sniffling.
"Oh, g'night then." replied Jamia dismally.

As I limped into my bedroom and began to take off my clothes I burst into silent tears. I could see the cuts on my body and bruises starting to appear. I got a pair of Gerard's pyjamas and lay them out onto my bed. I peeked through the gap in my bedroom door to find Jamia conked out on the couch. I tip-toed over to the bathroom picking up Gerard's pyjamas and decided to get changed in there. I ran a bath and lay in it letting the warm water sting my cuts and soothe my bruises. I saw the blood and vomit was still in the toilet and I again began to cry. At that moment in time I really wanted to go sink under the water and drown myself. I had to stay strong for myself and Gerard's sake. Once the pain had reached a minimum level I crawled out of the water and drained my bath. I looked at myself in the mirror and noticed that my dick was cut and swollen. I went over to my linen basket to reach for a towel when I noticed a ripped up packet of condoms. I dried myself and got dressed then started to fix the pieces of the scraps to read the message. It read:

I have saved you the effort of disposing of these yourself.
I am pretty sure that you will not be needing these anytime soon.
If you ever do need them however just ask me, I have a let’s say ‘secret stash’.
Gerard he needn’t know about this eh?
-XO Jamia
PS: I am trying to hint at something

What the fuck?