I'm Looking for Something More Than This

I pulled my knees up to my chest, trying to hold in my laughs that so often fell out of my mouth. I knew I couldn’t be making noise on the set but it was just so funny! Soon the scene was done and I saw a guy’s frame coming over that was a little bit more petite than some and his dark hair spiked up and his familiar smirk on my brothers face.

“That was so hilarious! I can’t wait to see that episode on TV,” I beamed, hugging my big brother tightly.

“I saw you trying to hold in your laughs,” Logan chuckled.

“It’s so hard though,” I overdramatically said as he led me down the hall to the dressing rooms that looked more like dorm rooms.

As always, we went to Carlos’ dressing considering he was the neatest of everyone and so his dressing room was always clean. Sometimes it’s weird to think that my big brother is in the band and TV show Big Time Rush. Yeah, Logan, the flirty one who kind of thinks he is a gangster, yeah he’s my big brother. It always cracks me up that on the TV show his character is kind of nerdy because that definitely isn’t him. I love my brother to death and although it is weird to see him onstage or on TV sometimes, I’m not totally surprised because he is so incredibly talented.

Logan and I have always been super close, he’s like my best friend and maybe it’s because at the age of 22, he is only two years older than me. When Logan moved out to Cali from our home in Texas when he was 18 and I was 16, I decided to come with him and Logan and I are very different but very similar in the fact that we’re kind of crazy and both artsy but in a different way. He definitely is great at acting and singing but I like writing and art which is what I do. I’m a photographer/graphic designer/fine artist/ anything people will hire me to do. I design a lot of logos and designs for tee shirts and business cards or photograph people, all of that stuff so that’s kind of where I am now.

Because a lot of my designing is online or I do it on the computer, I bring my laptop to the set of Big Time Rush a lot and just work there so I can be with all of them. I’m really close with all of the other guys of Big Time Rush too, James, Carlos and Kendall since we all hang out all the time and I love being around all of them

“Hey Kirstie, shouldn’t you be working?” The tall brown haired boy named James teased as Logan and I pushed the door open to Carlos’ dressing room.

“Slacker!” Carlos teased as I plopped on the couch next to him.

“You guys are leaving on your tour tomorrow and I’m going to go like five months without seeing you, I’m not going to waste the day working,” I replied. “I’m really going to miss you guys.”

“We’re going to miss you too Kirstie,” Logan said, pouting at me.

“Where is Kendall?” I spoke up.

“I’m here!” He shouted, walking into the room.

His tall, lanky frame came trotting into the room. His green eyes that were framed by thick eyebrows looked into my brown ones and his gorgeous smile pushed through, revealing his dimples. I’ve always had a crush on Kendall, ever since I met him. Logan is close with everyone but he’s extremely close with Kendall. They were friends before the Big Time Rush days and Logan suggested him for the role so I’ve known Kendall a while. Kendall is constantly over at Logan and my house for movie nights or dinner and it’s so much fun. He’s just a really special guy and is so sweet and caring but super funny and kind of dorky, but I love that. I couldn’t ever say anything though, he doesn’t like me anyway but I don’t think Logan would love the idea of me liking his best friend either.

“Where were you?” Carlos questioned.

“Getting permission for an awesome surprise,” He smirked.

“What awesome surprise?” Logan questioned. “Please tell me you aren’t bringing your dog, we already have James and Carlos’.”

“No, it’s not that,” Kendall laughed.

“What is it then?” I questioned.

“Well it’s for you,” He smiled at me.

“For me?” I asked and Kendall smiled brightly as he nodded his head.

”You’re coming on tour with us!” Kendall shouted.

I let out a big scream before jumping into Kendall’s arms, hugging him tightly. He let out a laugh as he spun me around before putting me on the ground.

“How did you get permission for me to come? Logan asked them and they said no,” I said to him.

“Yeah, they’re so strict about who can come and wouldn’t let me bring my own sister,” Logan added in.

“Well I heard our manager saying the band that is coming from England to tour with us were supposed to bring their photographer for the tour but he quit or something and so I said you could do it and it’s perfect because you know us and have done our pictures before so he said yes,” Kendall buzzed.

“That’s awesome!” James smiled.

“You are my hero Kendall!” I squealed, hugging him again.

“I know, I try,” He chuckled.

“Yeah, thanks bud,” Logan grinned, pulling him in for a bro hug.

“You better go pack for tomorrow,” Carlos smiled.

I let out another squeal making them all laugh before we shared a group hug. I can’t believe I finally get to go on tour with them! I’m so excited to spend so much more time with them and I know there is a girl singer and another band going on tour too, I don’t know who it is but at this point, I don’t care because I get to tour with Big Time Rush! Whoo!