Expectations
Six | What's Wrong with this Picture?
Tom’s POV
I was in the very best of moods upon returning to my hotel room; so good, in fact, that I didn’t even mind when Laura didn’t greet me as I walked in.
“Have you had anything to eat?” I asked her, and she shook her head in response. I went off to order something for us to eat then, feeling like it was getting to that time of day. Upon returning to the small living area, Laura had turned the TV on and was curled up in the corner of the couch. I wanted to wrap my arms around her. She’d never looked so adorable.
“So did you order strawberries and cream for dessert?” she asked, which kind of ruined the moment. I mean, I wasn’t expecting it, is all.
“I can if you want?” I knew I was blushing, which was terribly embarrassing because she wasn’t. I wasn’t really in the mood for what she had in mind, though, so I was hoping she’d get stroppy and tell me not to bother. After last night and earlier today, I wasn’t sure I wanted to touch her so intimately until I saw her with my own eyes washing that grime from her beautiful skin.
“Don’t worry about it,” she finally replied, returning her lips to a thin, tight line that told me she wanted to have it out with me. I wasn’t sure if I was happy with that outcome or not. I wanted to tell her that I had other ideas, but I wasn’t sure how to explain it. I had no idea, really, what it was that she wanted from me, and I didn’t want to embarrass myself by assuming.
I couldn’t keep my mind from wandering to Annette as I lay in bed finishing off Henry IV. Laura was reading something called “Dolly” which judging by the cover was aimed at teenage girls. She seemed to be enjoying it though, so I didn’t say anything. I just wondered if she knew.
“We should do something together tomorrow, my love. We should go sightseeing!” I was so excited by my sudden idea that I dropped my book and lost the page. Laura turned a page in her magazine. I thought I’d repeat my idea to her in the morning when she wasn’t so engrossed in something else. I cleared the lump in my throat then, because there were things that needed to be said regardless of whether she wished to listen or not.
“I know we’re a bit conflicted at the moment, Laura, but I am trying.” She put her magazine down then and turned to face me, but didn’t look at me. I could feel we weren’t as close as we once were. I felt I was bothering her just by bringing it up, but it would bother me if I didn’t. “I understand how you must feel about me… you know…”
“What, Tom?”
“Uh, well, not wanting to hit you and all that.” My hand found the back of my neck as I spoke, where I secretly pulled at my hair. I didn’t want to talk about this. At all. If there was something I couldn’t talk about for hours on end, it was sex.
“It’s not as if it’s abuse, Tom.”
“Uh well, it kinda is,” I replied, and she narrowed her eyes in that way that said she knew she was right. “What if we tried it the other way around?” She was quiet for a moment then as she thought about it, before a tiny smirk found the corner of her mouth.
“You can obey?”
“I can obey.” Her smirk grew as she watched me for a moment, and I was glad to finally have made her smile – or smirk – surely, it was the same thing.
“Take off your shirt,” she asked after a while, and I was reluctant at first. She went to pick up her magazine then, and so I began to unbutton it. Her eyes were on me the entire time and I was blushing, I knew, because she was laughing at me.
“Please don’t laugh, sweetie.”
“Then don’t blush. Now take off your belt.”
I wanted to roll onto my back, but I knew the pain would be unbearable. I shuddered as I saw my belt lying on the floor beside my book. I most definitely couldn’t do that sort of thing to Laura. I wasn’t sure who she thought I was if she expected me to hurt her like that. She seemed to enjoy our night a great deal though, and I’d do just about anything to make her happy. I wanted to get up and make sure she’d only bruised me as she promised, because I could deal with that and bruises faded over time, but I didn’t want her knowing I wasn’t happy about it. I didn’t want her to think I wasn’t enjoying myself, too. And so I lay there all night in agony, wanting nothing more than to be cuddled but knowing that wouldn’t happen.
I was in the very best of moods upon returning to my hotel room; so good, in fact, that I didn’t even mind when Laura didn’t greet me as I walked in.
“Have you had anything to eat?” I asked her, and she shook her head in response. I went off to order something for us to eat then, feeling like it was getting to that time of day. Upon returning to the small living area, Laura had turned the TV on and was curled up in the corner of the couch. I wanted to wrap my arms around her. She’d never looked so adorable.
“So did you order strawberries and cream for dessert?” she asked, which kind of ruined the moment. I mean, I wasn’t expecting it, is all.
“I can if you want?” I knew I was blushing, which was terribly embarrassing because she wasn’t. I wasn’t really in the mood for what she had in mind, though, so I was hoping she’d get stroppy and tell me not to bother. After last night and earlier today, I wasn’t sure I wanted to touch her so intimately until I saw her with my own eyes washing that grime from her beautiful skin.
“Don’t worry about it,” she finally replied, returning her lips to a thin, tight line that told me she wanted to have it out with me. I wasn’t sure if I was happy with that outcome or not. I wanted to tell her that I had other ideas, but I wasn’t sure how to explain it. I had no idea, really, what it was that she wanted from me, and I didn’t want to embarrass myself by assuming.
I couldn’t keep my mind from wandering to Annette as I lay in bed finishing off Henry IV. Laura was reading something called “Dolly” which judging by the cover was aimed at teenage girls. She seemed to be enjoying it though, so I didn’t say anything. I just wondered if she knew.
“We should do something together tomorrow, my love. We should go sightseeing!” I was so excited by my sudden idea that I dropped my book and lost the page. Laura turned a page in her magazine. I thought I’d repeat my idea to her in the morning when she wasn’t so engrossed in something else. I cleared the lump in my throat then, because there were things that needed to be said regardless of whether she wished to listen or not.
“I know we’re a bit conflicted at the moment, Laura, but I am trying.” She put her magazine down then and turned to face me, but didn’t look at me. I could feel we weren’t as close as we once were. I felt I was bothering her just by bringing it up, but it would bother me if I didn’t. “I understand how you must feel about me… you know…”
“What, Tom?”
“Uh, well, not wanting to hit you and all that.” My hand found the back of my neck as I spoke, where I secretly pulled at my hair. I didn’t want to talk about this. At all. If there was something I couldn’t talk about for hours on end, it was sex.
“It’s not as if it’s abuse, Tom.”
“Uh well, it kinda is,” I replied, and she narrowed her eyes in that way that said she knew she was right. “What if we tried it the other way around?” She was quiet for a moment then as she thought about it, before a tiny smirk found the corner of her mouth.
“You can obey?”
“I can obey.” Her smirk grew as she watched me for a moment, and I was glad to finally have made her smile – or smirk – surely, it was the same thing.
“Take off your shirt,” she asked after a while, and I was reluctant at first. She went to pick up her magazine then, and so I began to unbutton it. Her eyes were on me the entire time and I was blushing, I knew, because she was laughing at me.
“Please don’t laugh, sweetie.”
“Then don’t blush. Now take off your belt.”
I wanted to roll onto my back, but I knew the pain would be unbearable. I shuddered as I saw my belt lying on the floor beside my book. I most definitely couldn’t do that sort of thing to Laura. I wasn’t sure who she thought I was if she expected me to hurt her like that. She seemed to enjoy our night a great deal though, and I’d do just about anything to make her happy. I wanted to get up and make sure she’d only bruised me as she promised, because I could deal with that and bruises faded over time, but I didn’t want her knowing I wasn’t happy about it. I didn’t want her to think I wasn’t enjoying myself, too. And so I lay there all night in agony, wanting nothing more than to be cuddled but knowing that wouldn’t happen.
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I feel horrible for making Laura out to be a bitch, but I dunno... I think she works better like this. I'm sure lovely guys fall for bitches all the time. Sadly.Chapter title credited to This Picture by Placebo.