A Lifeless Dream

I blinked a couple of times before my eyes completely opened and I faced the almost familiar room. Where was I? Why am I here and not home? Maybe I’m still to Matt’s and Lucy’s? No…I remember leaving and Jimmy taking me home after everything that happened with Brian.

I looked around the room and slowly it was more and more familiar until realization hit me. What the hell am I doing here? What am I doing in Brian’s bedroom? How did I get here? Oh God…what the hell happened…I’m mad at him why did I come here? We didn’t do anything, did we? No we couldn’t…

I looked down at myself and saw that I was still in my clothes but I frowned when I saw that they weren’t the clothes I was wearing to the barbeque. I slowly got up from the bed and got in the bathroom. I stood in front of the mirror and examined myself…I didn’t look any different my hair was down but I remember pulling them into a ponytail sometime during the day.

I thought that it was better if I left before Brian finds out that I’m here. Although I’m sure that he already knows…maybe if I leave before he sees me he’ll forgot that I was here. If he hasn’t already…he chose her…Emma…! The pain in my chest started getting stronger by the minute and my eyes watered…how could he do this to me?

I wiped the tear that fall from my left eye before I got out of the bathroom. I couldn’t find any of my things so I decided that I would leave as I am. When I was close to the bedroom door I saw the knob turning and the door open reveling Brian with a smile on his face. Why in hell is he smiling?

“Hey you’re awake…how are you feeling?” he asked getting closer to me making me take a step back

“How do you think I’m feeling?” I snapped making him frown “And why am I here?”

“You live here?” he said a little hesitant

“What do you mean I live here? I have my own house…and after everything you did to me you really think I would come and stay with you?” I was seriously getting angry with him

“Wha-…we were…”we trailed off

“We were nothing you make sure of it…you chose her” I said my voice breaking

“That was weeks ago” he said and if I wasn’t confused before I was now for sure

“No it was a hours ago…Emma and I had a fight she made you chose and you chose her and I clearly remember Jimmy driving me to my place…So how did I end up here?” his eyes widened

“You…you remember” he said shocked

“Remember what?” I asked confused

“Fuck…” he said and shook his head

“Tell me Brian” I demanded

“You…” he sighed “You had an accident a few days after everything happened. You were going to the airport to go and live with your sister and the accident caused you a swelling on the head which lead to amnesia” he said and I was sure that tears were running down my face

“This can’t be true” Can it?

“I’m so sorry Alicia but it is” he said and came closer to me and touched my hand but I jerked it away from him

“Don’t touch me” I said hugging myself

“Alicia” he said with a pained expression on his face

“I want to get out of here…Where are my things?” I asked my head facing the floor

“Please stay…we should talk about this”

“I wanna go home Brian…where is my things?” I said looking into his eyes for a moment

“You sold your house”

“Stop lying to me” I yelled at him and I was even surprised with myself

“I’m not fucking lying to you Alicia” he yelled “You have to believe me” his voice softened

“Where are my things Brian?” I asked him once again getting impatient with him

“In the living room” he sighed before he followed out of the room and down in his living room

I spotted my bag and things although that’s not the things I had with me I knew they belonged to me. Maybe Brian was right? Did I really have that accident? No I couldn’t! I took my things and got ready to leave his house. I turned to look at him and his eyes were shining like he was ready to cry but I shook that thought away.

“Goodbye” I said and moved towards the door before his hand stopped me from doing so. I turned to look at him waiting to say something.

“Just promise me that you will come back here when you find out the truth…I’ll wait for you”

“Yeah just like you promised me that no one was going to hurt me while you were with me” With a last look on his pain filled face I opened the door and got out.

I started walking towards my house…I wanted to make sure that I had in fact sold it and everything Brian told me was true. I wanted to believe him I really did I just couldn’t and I didn’t want it to be true. It was a fifteen minute walk to my house from his and I needed the fresh air.

I checked my phone the one that I found in my bag and saw that it was five o’clock in the afternoon. The sun was still up in the sky and I felt my skin getting hotter by the second but I ignored the feeling and kept walking.

When I reached my house I noticed an unfamiliar car parked on the driveway. Before I had a chance to take a step the door to my house opened and a young couple came out and I stood frozen looking at them as realization hit me. Everything that he told me was true... the accident me having amnesia.

“Can I help you?” the girl asked me and I had now realize that I was standing in front of my use to be house starring at it

“Oh, sorry” I smiled softly at her “A friend of mine lived here did she sold the house?” I asked her

“Yes, I heard something about her moving to Paris…” she said a few feet away from the car her boyfriend already in waiting for her

“Thank you” I said and she nodded before getting into the car and me turning around and walking…I don’t know where I was going really. One think was sure I wasn’t going back to Brian; I couldn’t face him right now!

I was aware of the tears that were running down my face but I didn’t bother to wipe them off because they would be soon replaced with fresh tears. I didn’t know where to go…Going to Jimmy’s house were an option but he lived a little bit far from where I was and I think that I gave him enough drama with my life he doesn’t need more of it.

So I decided to go to the one person I knew that would never lie to me…Lucy. I trust her to tell me the truth and explain everything that happened to me. I was already close enough to hers and Matts house so I started walking faster in order to get here as fast as possible.

Five minutes later I was standing outside their door and I took a minute to compose myself before I knocked. My tears had stopped but you could hear a sniff escape from me every now and then. I knocked on the door and waited patiently for someone to open it. Matt opened the door and minute later and the time I took to compose myself seemed useless as I started crying again the minute I saw him.

“What’s wrong?” he asked as he pulled me into the house and in his embrace letting me cry because I couldn’t speak. I just shook my head at him as an answer before I heard Lucy’s voice

“Matt…Brian just called…” she trailed of and I felt her hand on my back moving it up and down trying to soothe me. I guess Brian did called to explained what happened to them.

“What happened?” I heard Matt ask with me still in his arms and Lucy right next to me

“She remembers” Was all she said to him before he gently pushed me towards the living room where I sat down with them on either side of me.

They both looked at me with concern and once again I tried to stop crying so I could talk to them. They waited patiently until I was ready to talk and Lucy had gone to the kitchen and came back with a glass of water. I took a few zips before I left it on the coffee table and took a deep breath before I talked.

“Don’t ask me what happened I don’t even know myself. I just woke up and I was in Brian’s house. I don’t even remember getting there…The last thing I remember is leaving from here with Jimmy and him dropping off at home, nothing else” My voice was low and suddenly the floor became very interesting.

“You don’t remember anything else?” Matt asked and I shook my head at him.

“Alicia a lot of things happen but I think you should talk to Brian first “Lucy said

“I want to know what happened to me…how did I had the accident in the first place” I asked looking at both of them waiting for an answer

“You were going to the airport” Lucy started “a truck run over your car the driver died on impact and you had severe brain damage and a few cuts. You were lucky you didn’t go into a coma… you had a swelling in the head and once it went away you woke up…but there is something that you really need to talk with Brian about”

“Why can’t you tell me?” I asked confused…what is it that she can’t tell me and only Brian can.

“I- I can’t” she shuttered “You have to talk with him”

I felt curious as to why I would have to talk with Brian about one thing that happened and I didn’t know if it was important or not. I decided to wait for a little while before I went to talk to him and give me and him some time to cool off because I think that I was too harsh on him but I was confused.

Imagine waking up in a room and you have no idea how you end up there and then someone telling you that you had an accident causing you amnesia…yeah you get the feeling.

“Do you mind if I go upstairs to the guest room? I wanna lay down for a little while my head hearts” I asked and they both nodded

“Of course sweetie.” Lucy said and Matt agreed too.

“Make yourself at home” he patted my back and smiled before he got up and disappearing probably going to play Call of Duty…I swear this guy is in love with the game.

“Are you going to be ok?” Lucy asked concerned and I turned my head to look at her giving a small smile

“Yeah I just want to lay down for a little while…this whole story took a toll on me” I replied and she looked at me for a minute before she nodded.

I then got up and made my way to the guest room with Lucy following behind me. She gave me a change of clothes that I would be comfortable with seeing I was wearing a swimsuit along with a pair of shorts and a t-shirt. Did I go to the beach earlier today?

I shrugged at my thoughts before I went to the bathroom and changed. I washed my face and re-entered the guest room. I lay down to the comfortable bed and closed my eyes. Thoughts started filling my head and I tried to shake them away. I started thinking about Brian…What was I doing on his house? And most important what happened to me on the accident that only Brian can tell me?

These thoughts kept roaming in my mind and I started slowly falling asleep…but I wasn’t ready of what happened next…