Girl, You Shoulda Been a Drummer

She's a dangerous kind, and I like it that way. On the night we met, I sent an S.O.S. Turned me upside down with the look on her face

The bright Chicago sun peeked out of the curtains of the hotel room the exact second it turned 7 o’clock. It was unusual for it to be this light outside so early in the morning, and even more so to be on the dot, but there were no rules when it came to the weather. The light stirred William from his deep slumber as it illuminated the room. He rolled from side to side in the large, two-person bed, easing his way out of his dreams. His eyes were slightly red from the way his contacts irritated them as he slept, his hair was a perfectly disheveled at the top of his head, and his body was sore from laying on his side for half of the night. William sat up slowly and took in his eerie surroundings just as slow. Maybe if he took his time observing, something would change before his tired eyes could catch it; maybe something would be different.

Empty, as usual.

It was always like this the next day, why should he expect anything different? He would wake physically sore, emotionally exhausted, and mentally praying that there would be no goodbye note waiting for him. Without even glancing towards the small coffee table, he knew that his clothes lay next to it in a bunch on the floor, and that his phone lay on top. Bill forced his weak body out from the warm, silk sheets and gathered his things. He briefly scanned his phone for messages and switched his contacts for the glasses in his jacket pocket. Just like every morning.

The nights however, they were different.

She's a perfect mess, a real one of a kind. When the curtains closed, we were gettin' close, and the clothes in the corner lay there all night.

The nights were spectacular; they were full of a lust that left him breathless, full of strong lips on his own or his chest or his neck. They were an escape from their frantic lives, a sinful break. But to Bill, the virtues far out weighed the vices. It was the chaste kisses in the darkened space, the sweet Spanish nothings being whispered into his ear, and the look in his lover’s eyes that made him crawl back for more. William smiled at the thought of Gabe feeling the same as he did, the same genuine love, but the hope vanished just as quickly. There was no point in him living in a dream.

He slowly stepped into his clothes from the night before, taking extra care to make sure they weren’t torn or wrinkled too badly. He was in no hurry after all; he had too much time if anything. After another quick scan of his phone, he sat in the armchair with his elbows on his knees, and attempted to clear his mind. There was something missing, something gnawing in the back of his mind, but he couldn’t quite put his finger on it. William scanned the room again, just to be sure, eyes flickering every which way for something out of place. The floor, the bed, the counter…

“The note.” William said in realization. He walked over to the neatly folded sheet of paper resting on the dresser and rubbed the material over his fingers. Bill opened the note with care and absorbed the words written in sloppy cursive with an inevitable grin resting on his face.

‘Gone for a quick swim if you’re awake before I get back.
Te amo, Gabe.’

Ooh, she didn’t skip a single beat, left me there while I was still asleep

Without much thinking or hesitating, William found himself speeding down the stairs towards the pool. This had never happened; Gabe had never been there when he woke up. He always went to rehearsal or to a party with Pete leaving Bill to the usual nostalgic feeling of the night before. He hated it; hated the sickly feeling of betray and hurt in his gut, the mind-blowing jealousy that pulsed through his veins, and the fact that he could never wake up feeling wanted.

But this, this was different. Gabe was still here, in the same hotel, on the same street, in the same city, and same country as Bill. There was no way he was giving this opportunity up. The hallways were surprisingly full of people, running about and making plans. ‘Late risers, I guess.’ he thought to himself as he opened the door leading to the large swimming area.

The indoor pool was humid from the heat seeping from the sauna right next door. It was hard to make things out, and the steam fogged up William’s glasses. He took them off and stuck them in his jacket pocket before taking it off as well. Gabe was mental for exercising in conditions like this, but nevertheless he swam his laps across the pool as if the humidity didn’t exist. William watched him swim for a while, until the boy finally noticed that he wasn’t alone in the foggy room. Gabe stopped his repetitive laps and smirked at the naturally sexy man watching him. He swam to the edge of the pool and gave Bill a cheeky grim.

“Alguien se ve hermosa esta manana…” He whispered as he propped himself on his elbows, causing Bill to raise an eyebrow. He loved it when William couldn’t understand his Spanish; he was cute when he was confused. He rolled his eyes sarcastically. “You should come swim with me, Bilvy.” Gabe said, reaching out for the younger. William flinched away from his wanting hands. “No Gabe, you know I can’t swim.” He mumbled, moving his feet across the concrete awkwardly, a slight blush covering his face.

Gabe sighed. He wanted him to be near him, to hold him in his arms and never let go. He wanted to tell Bill how much he loved him and wipe the awkward smile off of his face; and Gabe always got what he wanted. “Okay…” he sighed, only giving William a second of thought before pulling him into the water.

Girl, you shoulda been a drummer, you break me down like no other. You beat my heart black and bruised; no one does it like you do.

William flailed his arms and legs wildly, desperate to stay afloat. He tried reaching for the wall, a lane line, anything besides Gabe to hold on to. “It’s okay Bilvy, I’ve got you.” Gabe said, trying to grab William and calm him down. He wanted to scream, wanted to push Gabe away and never look back, but he couldn’t. He just couldn’t. The fear was too great, his heart raced and he filled his lungs with fresh oxygen every time Gabe managed to get him to the surface. William needed Gabe; there was no other explanation. He needed him, in more ways than staying afloat in the pool. He latched himself on to the older man, holding on tight. William wrapped his arms around his neck, his legs around his waist, and buried his face in Gabe’s shoulder.

He shook in the freezing water and wondered how it could possibly this cold when the air was so hot. Gabe swam them over to the edge of the pool and ran a hand through William’s now soaking wet hair. “I’m sorry babe, I really am.” he said, panic lingering in his voice. William simply nodded. “Are you cold Guillermo?” Another nod. “Let’s go inside. M’kay?” he whispered, gently kissing Bill on the cheek before carrying him out of the icy water.

No doubt, you've got perfect rhythm, crash and burn and then it ended. You played me so hard so fast, just like heavy metal thunder. Girl, you shoulda been a drummer

In a matter of minutes, Gabe had Bill wrapped up in his towel and in his arms, heading up towards their hotel room. The younger had his eyes glued shut as they moved, down the hall, up the elevator, passing people’s deadly glares. He didn’t care, they could laugh and whisper all they wanted, and he just wanted to stay in Gabe’s arms forever.

He didn’t even notice they were back in the room until he heard the door slamming behind him. Gabe lay him down in the warm sheets and tugged on his clothes. No response. He knew he really screwed up when William wouldn’t to talk to him. “Por favor Bilvy, hablar conmigo.” He begged. Bill looked up from where his head was buried in the mattress. His brown eyes met William’s and Gabe poked him playfully, managing to get a smile from the younger. His smile; the one that could light up a room, the one that gave even Gabe Saporta butterflies, the one that made everything okay.

Ooh, she didn't skip a single beat, left me there while I was still asleep.
Gabe helped Bill out of his clothes and wrapped them both in a cocoon of blankets and towels. William sighed contently as he ran his fingers mindlessly across Gabe’s chest. This is where he wanted to be, this felt right. Just letting Gabe hold him in his arms, run his fingers mindlessly through his hair, and sing as soft as his breath in his ear. Bill’s breaths were icy and full of breaks, even with the warmth surrounding them. Gabe let his own hot breath tickle William’s face. “What’s running through that pretty head of yours?” he asked as he placed butterfly kisses on his face and neck. Bill sighed and intertwined their fingers. “W-why are you still here?”

Gabe could practically hear his heart breaking.

He hated what they had, what he had made of this entire thing. It was his entire fault, he was the selfish one; he would leave Bill to wake up on his own. He couldn’t stand it if William regretted the nights they shared; it was easier to never know. It was easier on his part, and a lot less painful. William however, the boy was a mess. He had heard the lecture more times than he could count, but he never thought much of it, not until he heard the shaky words spill from the one who he thought didn’t care in the first place.

He would always make up for it though, he would always kiss him goodbye, always. “Oh Guillermo,” he whispered. “I always stay this long, you just sleep through it.” William let out a shaky breath and placed his head right over his best friend’s heart. The gentle thumping in his chest was steady, like his fingers tapping against a desk, or the bass line of a song, or possibly a metronome. “You’re heart’s like a metronome Gabanti.” He mumbled almost to himself. “You should have been a drummer.” Gabe laughed slightly and ran his fingers through his William’s short brown hair. He shifted on the mattress and Bill tightened his grip on him.

“You’re not leaving, are you?” he asked. He felt like an idiot as soon as the words slipped out. It was a needy, selfish thing to even think of. He shouldn’t make Gabe feel guilty like that; there were so many better things he could be out doing than sitting in a hotel with him. “Why would I want to leave Guillermo?” he replied, nuzzling into his lovers neck. “There are so many better things to do.” He replied; trying not to focus on the way Gabe was rubbing against that one spot that drove him completely insane.

“No hay lugar prefiero ser que en tus brazos mi amor.” He whispered heavily in his ear. William shuttered at the sensation of his breath. “W-what does-s that mean?” he asked as a blush creped onto his cheeks. “It means,” Gabe said before adjusting himself so he could look directly into William’s eyes. “There’s no place I’d rather be than wrapped up in your arms, love. I love you Bilvy.” Gabe wrapped his hand around his neck and brought their lips together in a soft, sweet kiss. Bill sighed in relief at the contact and wrapped his arms around Gabe, never wanting to let go. He found the strength to pull away, however, to whisper a message, “Te amo, Gabe.” before removing the space and silently thanking the sun for waking him up earlier.

/Girl, you shoulda been a drummer./