And I Am Failing

You were just waiting for some others to come along weren't you? I know you were now, that's why you wanted me to stay out of your head, right? So I couldn't tell too early and kick you out of the only home that you could be yourself in? So you could be around someone like you? I loved your blue form, I just didn't want us to get caught. You know what the government would do to us if they got the chance right? All I wanted to do was save you from that fate, but you just assumed like always, thought I was like all of the others, repulsed by your natural form, but you know what they say about assuming.

On top of it all you left when I was lying on the sandy ground of an island after he pulled a bullet out of my back, with no way for me to get to a hospital. Yes, you walked up to me and pretended to need my permission to leave, but you and I both know that was for show, and really, I don't think you would have minded if I died that day, not really anyway. Sure you would have made a show to keep up appearances, but it would all be an act. We both know it, it's everyone else who has this image of us being the almost perfect siblings. HA! How they could have ever gotten that idea I'll never know, especially now, when you left us, left me.

I've known for a while that it was all an act, why do you think I got so irritated when you showed that girl your eye? Sure I knew it was all an act with you, but did you know I wasn't acting? The only acting I ever did with you was acting like it was all ok when I knew you were going to leave me as soon as you found others. I knew how deceitful you were being, but I didn't want it to be true, I wanted to have someone that cared about me, actually cared about me, and you know why. You lived with me, and you know how my family was towards me, but I guess it wasn't enough.

I'm never enough for anybody am I? I wasn't enough for my mother, Kurt, or Cain. I'll never know if I was enough for my father, though I doubt I was. I wasn't enough for you or him either, was I? (I feel so pathetic, I can't even write your names, let alone say them.) Sure, Alex, Sean, and Hank are still here, but it's only a matter of time. I'm sure they're only here because they felt obligated, they'll leave soon enough, and I'll be just as alone as I was before I met you at the age of twelve.

No, I'll never be enough for anyone, but I can still try.