Everything About You

They say it's not okay to be different They say it's not right to think outside of the box. They say I'm not normal. They say I should change. The thing is, I don't want to. I love who I am, and it's who I was meant to be.

This is how my life began to change. It was all because of him. Even though our skin colors were different, we were meant for each other. He was my soulmate. I felt it. I was once a girl that couldn't take much of what people kept telling me. My family never could understand me. I knew who I was. I knew what I wanted to be. I was born a rocker. I knew this was the lifestyle for me. I just never knew he would be my soulmate. He wasn't really on the same level of rocker I was at. He was in a boy band. I never would have thought this could actually come to be.

Let me begin with the story in how it all came to be. I was only an eighteen year old high school graduate. I was fullfilling my dream of becoming a rock star. All I ever needed was my guitar and a stage. I started playing the guitar when I was only eight years old. My dad had purchased one for me ten christmases ago. From that day on, I knew what I was going to do with my life. It was then when my image changed. I was darker in a way no other eight year old would be. I started listening to bands like Metallica, Slayer, and Iron Maiden. My dad and I had a bonding moment when he got me that guitar.

I've been practicing for the last ten years. As the years went by I couldn't stop looking up other bands to listen to. It was about seven years ago when I started listening to Avenged Sevenfold, Bullet For My Valentine, and Five Finger Death Punch. Band after band, I became more intrigued with this genre of music.

...And seven years ago is when my father passed away. It was difficult to cope with at such a young age. I was merely an eleven year old girl that needed him. Of course I loved my mother, but my dad was my savior. He was the one who made me who I am to this day. Even if I knew he was always with me spiritually, it would have been nice to have him by my side today.

I was an eighteen year old who was in a band. The band was my only hope for making money. That was until I got cut from the band I initially started. Apparently the group had a different view on how things should go. We only have about a handful of gigs and they were getting restless. They all assumed fame would be handed to us. I, on the other hand, knew we had to work. We had to work hard and long. I didn't mind, because I was dedicated to this band. They were my friends from high school, but I knew I should have never trusted them to stay together.

First it was Molly, our drummer, who had to throw in the white flag first. She said she had too many things on her plate, with college and all. Then Thomas, our lead vocalist, cut his time short because he had knocked up his girlfriend and had to find a steady job to support them. Finally Peter, the bass player, left on account that it was pointless with just the two of us. Which left me standing in the practice room like an idiot. I knew then it was our last rehearsel. To be completely honest, I knew this day would come, just not so soon. I knew their reasons were all lies. They just wanted to get rid of me without it being awkward or something.

There was one thing I was certain of. I had to find another way to make money, and fast. I could smell my aprtment bills from a mile away. Not to mention I hadn't eaten much today other than a banana for breaskfast and half a buttered roll Molly had left behind. It wasn't a surprise I had gained five pounds. My body thinks I'm neglecting it and keeping in the fat.

As soon as I got home, via walking, I jumped on the computer before my electricty would be cut off to fill out applications at music stores or adds of any sort that was relating to music. There was one ad in particular that said a guitarist was needed for a band that was touring near by. They had no specific time in how long this was needed, but hell, I signed up as soon as my eye caught it. I typed so fast I barely remember most of the questions they asked. Finally, I added a comment for them to respond via cell phone. My phone was the only bill that got paid whenever I had spare cash on me. My entire life was on it, even though it was still a flip phone. I didn't care honestly. It worked and that was all I needed, not that I could even afford anything fancier.

I thought back to the ad. Boy band? I knew it would suck to play for them, but I needed a job. I was desperate at this point. I would play guitar for Bareny and friends if they needed me to. Now, it was waiting time.