All of Me

Today was our anniversary. That’s right, one whole year of D and I “officially” dating.

I have a surprise for you. Be ready by 7:00. I love you.

I smiled at the text I had just sent her and began preparing for the night. The day seemed like it dragged on forever, I just wanted to be with her already.

I wanted to make this special.

Instead of texting her like I normally would to let her know I was at her house, I went up and rang the doorbell.

“Good evening Baby.” I said as I gave her the dozen of roses I had picked out for her and I placed a kiss on her lips, “Happy anniversary.”

She gave me a small smile.

“Happy anniversary Nick.”

I could tell she was still hurt about what happened at the barbecue. All I could do for her was show her that I wanted her, only her.

“You look gorgeous.”

“Thank you.”

She was still very upset about Kelsey. She wasn’t acting like herself.

“Aren’t you going to eat anything?” I asked, I noticed she hadn’t touched her food.

“I’m not very hungry.”

“Baby, you really should-”

“Nick can we just go home? I don’t feel very well.”

I sighed.

“Are you sure?”

She nodded.

“Will you at least come home with me? We can watch movies and cuddle in my room.” I gave her my best puppy dog eyes

“Sure.” She said with a slight smile.

--

"Wow.” She said.

I made my room look as romantic as possible,you know candles, rose petals, the whole nine yards. After all I was trying to show her Kelsey meant nothing. I was also trying to convince myself that Kelsey meant nothing. I threw my jacket on the computer chair.

“Do you want some clothes?” I asked

She didn’t say anything, but I could see it in her eyes. She was broken. She grabbed my hands and pulled me close.

“Nick. I can’t do this.”

I sat down on the bed with her.

“D, that kiss meant nothing. I want to be with you. No one else.”

She began to cry. I wiped tears from her face and pulled her into a kiss.

She grabbed me by my shirt and unbuttoned the first 5 buttons, I looked at her with soft eyes and she undid the rest and pulled my shirt off.

I kissed her while trying to find the zipper on her dress.

Found it.

Once her dress was off, She pulled my jeans off.

“I can't say it enough baby. I'm sorry."

"I know, it's okay.” She whispered, “I love you and I don’t want to lose you.”

So many things went through my head. I felt guilty.

I got off of D and laid on my bed.

"Nick?"

"I'm sorry, I just have a lot on my mind." I reached in my drawer and handed D a shirt. She put it on and laid next to me.

"You want to tell me what's going through your mind?" She asked me.

“It’s nothing really. I just want to lie here with you.”

I loved D. I loved her so much. But, unfortunately someone else was running through my mind and I just couldn’t control it. I pulled her close to my chest.

"I love you, D." I told her.

I was unbelievably scared, something or somebody was going to ruin our relationship and I felt like it was going to happen.

"I love you too."

I kissed her. I wanted her, but it would be wrong to have sex with D while I'm thinking about some other chick. What was wrong with me?

She broke down in my arms.

"D what's wrong?"

She didn't answer me.

"Baby, talk to me."

"I'm going to lose you Nick."

"What are you talking about? You’re not going to lose me. Why would you think that?”

She didn’t say a word to me for the rest of the night. All I could do was comfort her.

I held onto her tighter and she fell asleep in my arms, I stroked her hair.

“I’m sorry.” I whispered.

I placed a kiss on her forehead and drifted off to sleep.