Today I Am Alive
Chapter 2
After that day, I started getting weird looks everywhere I went around town. I live in a really small town, so when I say everywhere, I mean everywhere.
I went into the locker room before soccer practice the next day, and all of my team mates were whispering. I just ignored it, and got dressed, and went to practice. After practice, the lacrosse girls were in the locker room and they started teasing me. I didn’t even bother getting dressed, I just ran straight for my car. I wanted to go home, lay in my bed, and cry myself to sleep. There was a problem with that though.
When I pulled into my drive way, my friend Ryan was sitting on the swing on my front porch. I got out of my car, and went and sat next to him on the swing.
“Hey, Sassy. How was practice?”
“I told you to quit calling me that, weirdo. And practice was fine.”
I didn’t want to tell him what happened. He didn’t know about the story I wrote, and I didn’t want to mention it to him either. I knew that he’d look at me differently.
“Well Silver, I was wondering if you’d want to go get something to eat with me?”
“Uhm… I actually already had dinner plans with my mom. Sorry Rys, maybe tomorrow night?”
He knew I’m always free on Friday nights, so he agreed to that. After he left, I walked in the house, and ran up the stairs straight to my room. I sat down on my computer, and got on Facebook for a-little-while. I noticed that the people who normally talked to me when they were online, didn’t IM or message me. I thought that was a bit weird. I decided to get on my blog, because I needed to tell someone how I felt.
I wrote out everything I felt on my blog, and I went to click post, but then I started thinking to myself.
What if the people on here start to judge me too?? What if I have people from my school or my family following me?? No. No! I can not let them find out how much this is bothering me!
So I clicked cancel, and didn’t post it. But I still knew how I felt, and it sucked. I immediately went into the bathroom and got onto the scale. I looked down, and to my surprise, the scale said 135 lbs. My mom then called upstairs and said that dinner was done. I yelled back and told her that I wasn’t hungry. I looked in the mirror for a few minutes, then grabbed up the scale, and took it into my room. I couldn’t sleep that night. I kept thinking to myself how disgusting I felt. I always thought I weighed way less than that.
What if I am fat?! How did I not see it before?! I can’t believe I even have friends. Why is this happening to me?!
I went into the locker room before soccer practice the next day, and all of my team mates were whispering. I just ignored it, and got dressed, and went to practice. After practice, the lacrosse girls were in the locker room and they started teasing me. I didn’t even bother getting dressed, I just ran straight for my car. I wanted to go home, lay in my bed, and cry myself to sleep. There was a problem with that though.
When I pulled into my drive way, my friend Ryan was sitting on the swing on my front porch. I got out of my car, and went and sat next to him on the swing.
“Hey, Sassy. How was practice?”
“I told you to quit calling me that, weirdo. And practice was fine.”
I didn’t want to tell him what happened. He didn’t know about the story I wrote, and I didn’t want to mention it to him either. I knew that he’d look at me differently.
“Well Silver, I was wondering if you’d want to go get something to eat with me?”
“Uhm… I actually already had dinner plans with my mom. Sorry Rys, maybe tomorrow night?”
He knew I’m always free on Friday nights, so he agreed to that. After he left, I walked in the house, and ran up the stairs straight to my room. I sat down on my computer, and got on Facebook for a-little-while. I noticed that the people who normally talked to me when they were online, didn’t IM or message me. I thought that was a bit weird. I decided to get on my blog, because I needed to tell someone how I felt.
I wrote out everything I felt on my blog, and I went to click post, but then I started thinking to myself.
What if the people on here start to judge me too?? What if I have people from my school or my family following me?? No. No! I can not let them find out how much this is bothering me!
So I clicked cancel, and didn’t post it. But I still knew how I felt, and it sucked. I immediately went into the bathroom and got onto the scale. I looked down, and to my surprise, the scale said 135 lbs. My mom then called upstairs and said that dinner was done. I yelled back and told her that I wasn’t hungry. I looked in the mirror for a few minutes, then grabbed up the scale, and took it into my room. I couldn’t sleep that night. I kept thinking to myself how disgusting I felt. I always thought I weighed way less than that.
What if I am fat?! How did I not see it before?! I can’t believe I even have friends. Why is this happening to me?!
♠ ♠ ♠
This one was short too. Please bear with me.