Love or Lust

Laying out her towel, Hazel perched herself on a deck chair while the guys raced each other along the wooden boardwalk over the water, Pat nearly falling straight it as he stumbled over his feet, and dived in.

“It’s cold!” she heard Garrett shriek immediately after resurfacing

“Harden up zombie boy!” She called out, he flipped her off.

“Like you can talk, you’re not even bothering to come in”

“On the contrary my friend, I’m waiting until the water warms up”

As the morning progressed into early afternoon, Hazel grew hot in her position under the sun and called it quits on her tanning. Slipping off her cover-up, setting it down over the chair, and flip flops, she walked along the boardwalk barefoot until she reached the end where the guys were all splashing each other and mucking around.

“The Queen-B graces us with her presence” Halvo grinned, ducking his head, an attempt to bow down to Hazel.

“Better watch out boys” Taking a few steps back, and getting into a running stance, Hazel took off and jump through the air, landing with a splash near Halvo. “And that is how it’s done”

The sweet smelling air around the lake was soon mixed with the mouth-watering scent of a barbeque, cooked by a very proud looking Jared. ‘The King of the Barbeque’ he had dubbed himself, trying to impress anyone that would watch with his skills as he turned over the sausages that were almost done.

“Food’s done!” Jared yelled. Pat was the first one to run for the food. While the others still in the water, scrambled out racing to get the best pieces. It was like watching a pack of wolves fight over a dead carcass. They were a bunch of savages.

Taking a seat next to Garrett, Hazel listened to their conversation, reminding that she was surrounded by testosterone, while they discussed the Arizona party scene and ‘smoking hot’ chicks that it brought with it. She rolled her eyes and tuned out their talk as the topic changed to sex.

Later as the sun began to set, a cool breeze swept across the lake; as Halvo and Kennedy attempted to light a fire, insisting they could do it alone. Between the two of them, they had no idea.

Nonetheless it provided great entertainment for the rest of the group as they swore at each other and the lack of fire they were making.

“Voila!” Halvo exclaimed as a spark finally lit, and spread until the fire was raging, warming the near vicinity. “I’ll take a moment for myself”

“Dream on Halvo!” Garrett yelled throwing an empty beer can into the fire, narrowly missing Halvo.
The music was cranked up, the fire blazing, a group of four boys danced drunkenly around to 90’s pop punk. Getting a drink from the cooler, Hazel sat down on one of the logs placed around the fire, and watched as the flames flickered, making a crackle noise, from the wind.

She looked out at the lake, the moon reflecting on the still water. It was then did she see the outline of someone, sitting at the end of the wooden jetty. Glancing around at the drunken group, she noticed John wasn't among them, she didn’t even notice that he had walked off.

Hazel set her drink down and wandered away from the warmth and noise. Her bare feet sunk into the softness of the grass while she walked towards the jetty. John didn’t even move as she sat down beside him, he continued to look out at the lake exhaling the smoke from his cigarette. Looking up, the sky above was clear of any light pollution and decked with thousands of bright stars, shining as though waiting to be discovered and explored.

“Do you believe in love John?” Hazel asked, breaking the comfortable silence that had fallen between the two.

“Why do you ask?”

“I don’t know” She paused, thinking. “You’re no stranger to admitting your ways, parties every weekend and the endless woman you have surrounding you, so it makes sense to ask you of all people”

Hazel turn her head and looked over at John, his eyebrows were furrowed as though he was deep in thought of Hazel’s question.

“Yes, I do” He replied simply, Hazel scoffed at his response. “It may be hard to believe DeLancey, but everybody believes in love, including me”

“I don’t”

When Hazel was younger she believed in love, just like everybody else, but things always change. Her parents always seemed to have the most loving relationship, showing their daughter what it was truly like to be in love. But all good things must come to an end. Watching them fight constantly and then eventually get a divorce confused her 12 year old self and from then on, Hazel told herself she would never fall in love in a relationship.

“Not all things end it heart break” John told her

“No” she agreed “But it’s better to hold back in case it does. My mother taught me this trick when I was little: If you repeat something over and over again, it loses its meaning. Our lives, she said, are the same way. You watch the sunset too often, and it just becomes 6pm. You make the same mistakes over and over; you’ll stop calling it a mistake. If you just wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up, one day you’ll forget why. Nothing is forever she said. That O’Callaghan is why I don’t believe in love, because one day you’ll just say it for the sake of saying it, there will be no meaning behind it. It will just become a part of your daily routine.”

“You can’t die being unloved for your whole life”

John shifted his body, moving closer to hazel, so that now they were both staring at each other. For a moment, neither of the two said anything. It was the most serious conversation spoken between them. Hazel DeLancey was a girl who sought out attention, putting up a wall that shielded her emotions from others, but right now, John could see right through her.

“If you put it that way” She spoke “I’d rather be in love than dead”.

Her blue eyes found his green ones and John looked as though he wanted to say something but remained silent. “I want to try something” she whispered close to his ear before hovering over his face, her hair falling around her face. “Don’t move”

Hazel pressed her lips to John’s slowly, as if waiting for him to suddenly object. He didn't, and placed a hand on her cheek, kissing her back. John deepened the kiss, pulling her on top of him, entwining their fingers as their lips molded together perfectly. When they broke off, they were breathing heavily and Hazel moved away from John, saying nothing.

Dusting the dirt off of her, she returned to the fire where already Pat was passed out from excessive drinking, with Halvo and Kennedy close behind him. John arrived shortly after her, but continued to walk straight past the mostly drunk group to the lake house, purposely avoiding Hazel’s glance.