Not Like the Movies

"When you break up, your whole identity is shattered. It's like death."
--Dennis Quaid.

"Alright, Louis. I'll see you next week then, yeah?" I simply nodded, not bothering to say anything. After all, I had said enough during the past hour.

Tonight was a particularly colder night in London. It had been raining nonstop all day, and now that it had finally died down, the whole town seemed to be under a dreary spell.

I walked out of the brick building, pulling my black jacket up around my neck as the chilly November wind sent chills down my spine. It's almost humorous how the weather can show exactly how you feel. Almost.

I found my car easily in the nearly empty parking lot. As I got into the expensive automobile, I could only feel more loneliness, if that was even possible.

I drove in silence during the car ride on the highway, and through the neighborhoods. They say silence is when you think the most, but right now I felt like I couldn't think at all. My mind was clouded with meaningless thoughts, but maybe that was just the depression kicking in.

The clock on the dashboard read 8:06, and I couldn't help but sigh. I was stalling. I knew it, they knew it, the whole world probably knew it. But could you blame me for trying to kill time?

Despite the constant explanations from my friends on why a party was needed, I still felt like it wasn't. All it was going to do was give people a reason to give me sympathy. I knew they'd give me one look, and think 'Poor, Louis. Such a shame. They were so good for each other.' or my personal favorite, 'I never liked her anyway. She wasn't right for you.'

If that was true, then why didn't anyone stop me from marrying her? Why hadn't anyone told me that this wasn't going to be from death do us part? Why hadn't someone just spoken up if they had known all along, instead of watching me break.

I pulled up to the red light, banging my fists onto the steering wheel, angrily. No matter the amount of therapy I went to, I still couldn't understand why this had to happen.

Why did I have to fall for her of all people? More importantly, why couldn't she have fallen for me also? Why did she have to go and fall for my best mate?

I was crying now, and even though I was still wiping the wet, liquid from my eyes, I knew it was no use. The tears would never stop coming as long as I was still breaking, and from the looks of it, that was going to be for awhile.

I had finally pulled up to the driveway, where cars were lining the street. I wiped the tears away once more with a sigh, and got out of my car. I could already hear the booming bass of whatever song was playing, and I could practically smell all the alcohol in the house. I went in, nevertheless, hoping no one would realize I arrived.

"Louis! It's about time! What took you so long, mate?" Zayn questioned over the loud music. I never understood why at the age of twenty seven he was still throwing house parties.

I nodded my head at his obvious statement, and made my way towards the kitchen, but stopped once I saw who was there.

"Shh, Harry. Don't! Stop! Oh my god, you are ridiculous."

"But you love me don't y- Shit. Louis. Yo-You're here. H-hey."

I think that's what I hated the most about this whole situation- he kept seeing her, and she kept seeing him. It never mattered that they broke up a marriage, no neither of them ever gave two shits.

"Lou, how are you doing?" Just fucking fantastic since you declared you were cheating on me.

I figured they were a waste of my time, and headed out of the kitchen, ignoring them both. I was done here already, and I hadn't been here more than five minutes.

"Louis? Don't tell me your already leaving!" Liam exclaimed, coming to my side just as I had been about to make it out.

"'Fraid so, Li. See ya around, mate." I managed to get out, as I swung the front door open, and made my way to my car, careful to avoid the drunks surrounded the outside area.

Once I was back in the safety of the my empty car, I chocked back a sob. When had things gone wrong? How did it get to the point that my once bandmates turned best friends, were now practically strangers? More importantly, why was this all happening to me?