Torn

Garry, pulled up to a sand brick building, I looked out the car window, last time I was here I was 10, Mum made me run in and leave dad’s lunch at the reception, turns out she couldn’t face him because she was going straight to the solicitors the minute she dropped me at school to file for divorce.

“Miss, are you ready.” Garry smiles at me. I nod.
As I get out the car I start to walk towards the double doors I pull out my wallet taking out my I.D,

“Hello Officer, I’m actually a Rookie at 71st in the morning.” I hand him my I.D and he walks over to reception, they sign me in.

He returns handing me a name badge, “Miss L Carter” I nod in response, “follow me to interview room 3 please.” I follow, I look at my badge it was my pass for the morning it had ‘ROOKIE’ written on it in big red letters and this was my pass before I got my badge tomorrow morning. I walked through the grey cinderblock walls, covered in bulletin boards and banners.

We walk to the third door, Garry opens it to show a room with a small coffee machine, and a set of table and chairs in the right corner, it also had a standard issue recording machine and I sit down on the chair Garry points to. I smile as I’m asked “Would you like a drink?” I nod, “Is tea okay?” I nod again.

“I would love a cup of tea thank you.” I smile “Black no sugar”

“Wow, your dad takes tea the same way.” Garry chuckled.

“What…” I look up I notice for the first time I had been looking at my badge.

“I know your little Lilly; I was your dad’s partner when you were born.” Garry smiled, “I’ve seen your pictures on your dad’s wall every year, even the ones when you had braces.” The door opened and Darren walked in smirking.

“I remember the braces too.” He laughs. I harrumph back folding my arms like a little kid again but smiling jokingly.

“Excuse me, but while I’m at the precinct I am Miss Carter and my father isn’t on the staff.” I smile at Garry and Darren. “In fact I am a witness, who would like to get home as she starts a new job in the morning.” I smile, sweetly.

“Well, Miss Carter, Why don’t we begin?” Darren smirks as he hands me my tea.

Garry presses the button to commence recording and I answer all questions, when we’re done, Garry says thanks and leaves the room. Darren takes my cup and bins it.

“Still want a lift home Officer Carter, when you’ve signed your statement.” He smiled. “Or can I call you Lily?”

“Darren, I went through law school with everyone knowing I was the stepdaughter of DA Carter, I can’t do that again the special treatment from elders, the snide comments from peers. I just want to become a Police Officer.” I sigh and scribble my statement and hand it to Darren. “I can walk home.”

I walk out the room and I pass my dad’s office. I find the notepad holder super-glued to the door; I remember making it for him it had the words ‘Out the office, leave me a note.’ Except after 15 years it now says, ‘Ot t Offie, lave me not.’ I wrote a simple ‘See you tomorrow, Lil.’ I’d have to fix the door sign.

I walked out the Precinct.

As I walked down the busy urban street getting ready for the 6pm rush traffic I smile remembering silly things such as getting my head caught in the wire fence at the park when I was six, or the first day I met Darren when I was visiting dad for my 14th birthday, Darren was a fresh faced 21 year old Rookie and my dad his training Officer, I had been at the park and called my dad crying my eyes out after having fallen and broken my arm, Darren had been on his first month of policing, my dad hadn’t had time to drop him off at the precinct, so had been brought along.

He had been the only person to stop me crying, by buying me a bag of frozen corn to hold over it until we got to the hospital near Dan’s.

I get to the front door and slide in my key, it clicks open and I sigh as I smell really strong chicken soup. I run up the stairs to find Nora’s door open.

I knock twice, “Nora?” I walk in to find her a sleep sitting in her chair; I go over to the oven and see what appears to be a well reduced chicken soup, which luckily hadn’t burnt yet. I turn it off and then check the other appliances. I then go to wake her and then I feel her hand, it is stone cold. She isn’t breathing. I check her pulse and surely it is also none existent. I’ve never been in this situation before.
I stand there lost. After about ten minutes of being rooted to the spot out of fear and double checking that I have not disturbed a crime scene.

I run to my flat shuffling through my mountain of keys, I franticly push a key in the door and turn it I then hear an earth shattering snap. Crud wrong key and now the door locks are broken. “Fuck.” I curse. I decide to break it down. I find the emergency battering ram, under the fire hose in the cabinet on the landing, I walk back and run forwards aiming the rams’ full force on to the metal lock and the door frame splits apart, the opposite side of the frame is splintered disrupting my old height chart. I sigh and wince as I realise I’ve pulled my trapezium or deltoid badly.

I run to grab my mobile off the counter and dial an ambulance and the police. I then call my Dad as head caretaker he will have her next of kin details, Darren answers “Hello Detective Kingsley’s Phone, Officer Sanderson speaking.” I am feeling sick, as my adrenaline is wearing off.

“Is my dad there?” I ask starting to hyperventilate. My Dad is handed the phone I hear him ask what is wrong and Darren saying he doesn’t know.

“Lily pad?” he says worried, “Lily what is wrong.”