Doing What He Does Best, Leaving. Again.

“So what are you doing in town Sidney? I mean the lockout is happening and training camps won’t open because of it.” I asked as I sat down next to him at the table with Kris across from me. His gaze never left mine as I began to put food Dakota and Ryan’s plates. He was obviously pissed that I chose to sit next to Sidney since when I went to sit there was a chair open next to him as well.

“I just figured I would give my support wherever needed in this situation. I’m finally back to feeling up to playing hockey and I can’t even play it. It sucks. I just want this lockout to be short and let us get back to our game.” He said between bites. Kris nodded his head in agreement.

“Considering playing overseas if this lockout is longer than we expect?” Kris asked.

“Never. With all my injuries over the past few years I really do not want to risk it. I rather just stay here and condition. Have you thought about it?”

“A bit.” Kris shrugged his shoulders and went back to attacking his plate.

“Are you being serious?” I exclaimed, setting down my fork. Never in the weeks that I have known about this lockout has Kris ever mentioned that he was thinking about going to Europe to play hockey. Dakota’s, Ryan’s, and Sidney’s eyes all went right to us, probably expecting world war three to break out at the table.

“I didn’t say yes. I just said I thought about it.” He calmly answered back. I could tell he was nervous that I was going to snap.

“Well did you ever think of telling me you were thinking of it?” I shot back.

“No I didn’t since I didn’t make a decision. It is my decision after all.” He shot back. His nervousness was gone and he was just as mad as I was.

“It may be your decision but it affects Ryan and Dakota. You should have told me.” My voice began to quiver as I tried to relax. This really was nothing to be mad over. I glanced back over at Sidney and he looked nervous for the both of us. Dakota and Ryan just sat there in silence, shuffling their food across their plates. There I go again, messing up a nice dinner over my family feud drama with Kris.
“You’re right. I’m sorry.” Everyone’s head shot up and looked at Kris. He never apologizes.

“I’m sorry too. I overreacted. You were only thinking about it, it’s not like you made a decision.” Now it was everyone’s time to look at me.

“Wow, Kris and Danielle both apologize? I never thought I’d see the day.” Crosby laughed as he began picking up the dirty dishes. I stifled a laugh as I began to help clear the plates.

“So how about desert?” he walked towards the kitchen with the dirty plates. The kids screamed yes in unison and we chuckled. They were just too cute.

“I’ll help.” I quickly got up and followed Sidney into the kitchen. Honestly, I just wanted to go home. My mini fight with Kris was too much for today. I know I am being whiny and all but if this is how we act after agreeing to trying and being friends how will Thanksgiving go? Would it be open season at the dinner table?

“You can go sit down. I can do this.” Sidney said as he began to plate the cake on the plates.
“It’s fine. I just needed to get out of there.” I handed him a plate and he put a large piece of cake on it.

“Still trouble in paradise?”

“Hah. Has there ever not been?” I laughed as I put forks on the plates.

“Maybe you both should just move on.”

“It’s harder than that. We’ve been friends for so long. And with Dakota and Ryan it just makes it tougher. I wish it was just that easy.” I began to pick up the plates and so did Sidney.

“It could be that easy. Maybe you just aren’t looking hard enough.” He said with a wink and with that he walked out of the kitchen. Maybe Sidney was right. Maybe it was just time to move on. Get a new man in my life. I mean Kris did have a girlfriend while we were co-parenting. So why couldn’t I have some fun? We cannot let Kris have all the fun, now can we?

“Thanks for inviting us over Kris. It was a really good dinner. And it was nice seeing you again Sidney.” I said while giving Sidney a hug. I stepped back and watched Dakota and Ryan engulfed Sidney. I couldn’t help but laugh. Sidney pretended to fall down under their weight which amused them very much. He was good with them and they really loved him.

“Okay okay let’s not kill Sidney. We do need him if we want to get this lockout over with.” Kris laughed. Dakota and Ryan ran over to Kris and gave him a hug.

“Time to go guys.” I began to grab their coats. They began to protest but I gave them the look and they knew I meant what I said. They sighed and slipped their coats on.

“I’ll see you later.” I said to Kris and gave him a quick hug. He tried to hold on longer but I pulled away. We waved goodbye and walked out towards the car. Dakota and Ryan quickly climbed in. They were exhausted. They could hardly keep their eyes opened as they buckled their seatbelts.

“You forgot this!” I quickly spun around, startled at the voice. There stood Sidney clutching onto my purse. His hand instantly shot out and grabbed my arm, steadying me on my feet. I let a small smile etch onto my face.

“Thanks. I always forget something.” I laughed as he handed me my bag. I gave him a small hug and went to get into my car.

“You know how I said that maybe you should try moving on?” He leaned against my car with a nervous smile on his face.

“Oh god please don’t tell me you changed your mind and think I should give Kris another shot. You saw how dessert went. We could hardly say a sentence to each other.” I exclaimed. Honestly, this was tiring. I just wanted to go home and jump into a hot bath and forget this dinner had ever happened.

“Not really what I was gonna say. I was actually hoping, you would um, like would you want to…” he started but began to stutter. His nerves were getting the best of him.

“Are you asking me out?” I quirked my eyebrow up.

“Well I guess I’m trying to. So how about lunch, just the two of us, tomorrow?” he asked, a hopeful grin on his face.

“Yeah sure. That sounds fun.” I grinned ear to ear as he instantly calmed down and a smile shot across his face.

“Okay cool, I’ll pick you up at two.”

“Sounds great, I’ll see you then!” I gave him a wave and he waved back, making his way back to the house. I couldn’t help but notice the curtain in the window by the door move.

My heart instantly sunk. Kris obviously saw everything. But there was no way he heard anything. I slipped into my car and backed it out of the driveway. Dakota and Ryan were fast asleep in the backseat. I let out a sigh. For a girl that was asked out by Sidney Crosby, which many girls would kill to be in my shoes, I wasn’t sure how I felt. Sidney was great guy. He was a best friend to me. But couldn’t this potentially cause problems with Kris? I really didn’t want things to get worse than they already were. We are trying to not fight as much. But who really knows if that will ever happen even. I pulled into the parking lot and parked in our usual spot.

“Hey guys. Gotta wake up. Sorry you are too big to carry now a days.” I whispered to Dakota and Ryan, gently shaking them to wake up. They began to stir and rub their eyes. They were exhausted. It took a few minutes of coaxing but they finally got out of the car and we walked up to our apartment. I unlocked the door and we flocked inside. The kids struggled to take their jacket and shoes off so I helped and hung them up. I tried not to laugh but they looked like miniature zombies waking around as they got ready for bed.

“Did you guys brush your teeth?” I asked, standing in the hallway between their rooms. Their rooms were right across from each other so it made it easy for me to check on both of them at the same time. They both managed to say yes as they climbed into bed.

“Sweet dreams. Love you both.” I smiled as they pulled the covers up to their chins and chorused I love you too back to me. I loved these moments with my kids. I could always tell they meant it when they said they loved me, like how I mean it when I say it to them.

I went into my room and changed out of my clothes and drew up a bath. I just needed to soak and forget about my problems. As the water heated up I slipped into the bubbles and tried to forget the evening. But I couldn’t. There was just too much to process. I did agree with Sidney that I needed to start dating again. I cannot just be single the rest of my life. I’m young. But is dating Kris’s friend the best solution? I don’t want anyone to be hurt. But Sidney really is a great guy. And he gets along well with Ryan and Dakota. He doesn’t even mind that I am a, semi, single parent. I couldn’t sit in the tub anymore without my thoughts consuming me so I dried off and threw on a pair of sweats and a hoody.

I walked down the hallway towards the living room and threw myself into the black oversized chair that was next to the gas fireplace. I fumbled my phone in my hands. I was tempted to call Sidney back and cancel our date. I really didn’t want to cause any bigger problems between Kris and I.
I dialed a few numbers and waited for an answer. Heck it’s late he probably won’t even answer, which made my heart sink.

“Hello?” a groggy voice answered on the other end.

“I’m sorry Jordan. Did I wake you?” I looked at the clock and realized it was close to midnight. It was a lot later than I thought it would be.

“It’s fine. But you better have a good reason to call me this late.” He chuckled. His voice became stronger as the sleepiness went away.

“Do you think it’s a good idea for me to start dating?” I asked, twirling the ribbon of my sweatshirt.
“If this is really the only thing you wanted to ask me I’m going to hang up.” Jordan laughed his hearty laugh into the call. Oh how I’ve missed him.

“It’s not just that. It’s complicated.” I laughed back.

“But to answer your question, yeah why not? You’re hot. You are young. Brilliant and talented. And you are hot. Oh wait I said that already. But heck if I wasn’t married we’d totally be together.”

“You know how to make me feel better.” I laughed back to him causing his laugh to come back.

“So who is the lucky guy?” I contemplated even telling him. I had to though. That’s why I called him. Jordan always had the best advice and I really needed his right now.

“Sidney…” I whispered.

“You got to speak up girl. For a second I thought you said Sidney.”

“I did…” I answered back, slightly nervous as what he was going to say.

“And you think that’s a good idea?” I sighed. Great. Now here comes a lecture.

“I don’t know what to think! That’s why I called you!” I exclaimed back, “We were just talking about how I should move on from Kris, cause we were fighting again at dinner. We always fight. Even when we say we are not going to fight we fight. It’s hard. And Sidney made me feel better. And he is right. I should date. I cannot stand here hoping Kris will change. Because he won’t change. He is still the same guy that gets going when things get tough. And Sidney is, well he’s, just so supporting. I don’t want to cause problems between the two of them, I just feel like I need this.” I began to cry a bit.

“Baby girl. It’s gonna be okay. I didn’t mean for it to come out as bad as it did. I just never thought of you dating Sidney. Well going on a date with him. He’s a great guy. And Kris did date a girl too while you guys were working out your problems. I don’t think it is going to be a big deal. Will he be mad? Oh hell yeah. But I don’t think he will ruin his relationship with you, with Sidney, or his kids over it.”

“Thank you.” I am beyond blessed to have Jordan in my life. He always knew what to say. And he was always truthful to me.

“You’re welcome baby girl. Now I’m gonna go back to bed before Heather comes looking for me with the shotgun. I’ll talk to you later, at a more decent hour.” He laughed. I said my goodbye and the phone went dead.

Maybe Jordan was right. Kris will be mad, hell he was mad I sat next to Sidney instead of him at dinner. But I don’t think Kris will ruin his relationships with everyone over it. I turned off the light and made my way to my room. It was now nearly one in the morning and fatigue was taking over my body. I crawled into bed wanting nothing more than to fall asleep and leave this day behind me.