Life's Complications

I hesitated wether or not to go see Jake. I don't want Cameron to see us together. But chances are he won't go to the roof. I still felt guilty and sick at the pit of my stomach. I sat the metal bench viewing the school grounds. There are rarely people here, most of them have detention or are tutoring. I was lost in thoughts where Jake approached me.
"I'm glad you came." He said.
"What did you want to talk about?" I asked.
"I wanted to talk about that thing with your boyfriend." He said.
"Cameron."
"Yeah, Cameron." He said. "We all know what I did was stupid and wrong and in all ways selfish and I wanted to apologize."
"It's fine." I sighed. "I've worked it out with Cameron."
He stared at me then at the sun setting and then back at me, and I can hear his breathing. "You know the thing is, It kills me to see you with him. It's stabs me in the heart and you don't even care."
"Jake," I said. "You're my friend too but you have to respect my relationship with Cameron. It doesn't mean I don't care."
"Alice, I like you." He said. The three words I'm most afraid of. "A lot."
"I like Cameron." I said.
"You'll think about it?" He asked.
I got up from the bench. "I'm sorry."
I was leaving the school's gate when Nathan spotted me with his guitar. I tried my best and prayed he wouldn't come and talk to me but he did. "Alice?" He was out of breath. "What are you doing here?"
"I forgot some stuff and I just came to get them." I said, he smiled. I started to back away and step away from the school's ground. "Well, have a good practice, Yeah?"
"Uh, Yeah."

I sat at my room staring at the ceiling for countless minutes. I know I should tell Cameron or Jake himself will. But I don't want Cameron to freak. I decided to take it into consideration and what would I do if he was to deliver such news. I'd be crazy jealous.
"We need to talk." I tell him when he stopped by.
"Oh oh," He smiled. "That's never good."
"It's not that bad." I said. "Not entirely."
"Okay," He said. "You're making me nervous. Come on, tell me."
"Jake confessed that he likes me." I told him. His smile nervousness faded and it's been replaced by eyes of anger. He readjusted his position. "But I totally rejected him."
"That ass." He said. He punched the couch in complete the frustration. I hate seeing him like this. I cupped his face with my hands and kissed him. He smiled through it. I rested my head on his forehead and closed my eyes. "I won't let anything happen to us, I promise."

My phone woke me up in the morning. I forgot to put it on silent.
It was Zach.
"Hello?" I said, annoyed.
"Hey, Alice." Zach said. "Can you stop at our school's theatre today?"
"Why?" I'm too lazy to function.
"I need you to sing for us?" He said. "Remember for the competition?"
"Oh," I moaned. "I don't want to."
"Oh come on." He said. "I'm sure you don't suck ... That badly."
"Wow," I said. "Thanks."
"Sure thing, stop by at fifth period." And he hang up the phone.

I breathed in and out and tried to inhale as many air as I humanly can and the music starts. The microphone shook in my hands and I couldn't find my voice. The lights and the guys are all staring at me. They are all staring at me and I couldn't handle it.
"Stop the music." Zach said. "Are you okay?"
"I'm not sure." I said. "I can't do it."
Zach sighed. "Alright, clear the room. Just the band and Lisa are allowed in here."
Everyone's mumbled echoed in my ears. Most of them were complaints of my extreme shyness. I stood in the middle of the stage waiting for the room to empty. It did.
"Can you sing now?" Zach asked.
"I'll try to."
Michael moved towards Zach's microphone. "This band's future depends on you, no pressure."
"I did not need to know that." I repeated the steps of running the oxygen through my lungs safely and correctly. I chose the song So Soon by Marianas Trench. The boys love the song and I know it. I start to freak out as soon as I sang the first verse.