Butterfly Kisses

"You miss daddy, don't you?" Zara paid no attention to me. She was too fascinated with her hand.

It's been three weeks since he left and I've been doing okay. And by doing okay, I meant with taking care of Zara. Emotionally, not so good. I missed him like hell. We video chatted and he called and stuff but it wasn't the same. I honestly just wanted to go over to America and see him.

That was a god damn good idea. It was! Really. I could go there because he told me that they would be in Philadelphia tomorrow and I could go there and be at the hotel after he got back from his show and surprise him! I'm so fucking smart. I picked up Zara and carried her upstairs and began packing for us.

Literally, it was a perfect idea. I'm so proud of myself.

"Guess what, Zara?" She laid on the floor again and she wasn't paying attention still. "We're going to surprise daddy."

I folded onesies for her and placed them in the suitcase along with my clothes. I grabbed a small bag and stuffed in a sweatshirt and a few of her toys and just things that I needed. I sat by Zara for a few minutes to buy plane tickets and when I finished, I picked her up and carried her downstairs and got her all ready before I brought the suitcase down and called a cab. I looked around at the house and made sure I had everything I needed.

»

I was sitting in the waiting area by the gate for our plane and I fed Zara while I waited. She finished her bottle and I put it back into my bag and burped her.

I got to go on the plane first since I had a baby with me and I sat down in the first row. I shoved my bag under my chair and watched people start coming on to the plane. I shook Zara a little so she'd fall asleep and I put her blanket over her when she closed her eyes.

I got out my phone and texted Dan.

Have a good show! I love you xxx

I put it on airplane more and got my headphones out and put one in my ear. I tapped my foot and soon the flight attendant was closing the plane door. The plane started up and I stared out the window. I closed my eyes when the plane started moving down the pathway and went faster and faster. I breathed out when we were finally up in the sky and I watched the airport get smaller and smaller.

»

It was now dark but it was slowly becoming a little light from the sun. We were almost to America and Zara was still sleeping. I smiled down at her when her lip was out and it looked like she was chewing on something.

I played around on my phone and got some pretzels and a soda when the girl came to me with the cart.

"She's adorable." She smiled down at Zara.

"Thank you."

I took my soda and pretzels from her and set it down on the tray. I munched away on my snack while the music still payed in my ear.

I just wanted to get there already.