Yesterday.

Blue? No… whitish gray… maybe blue and whitish gray? Some green… The sky was so many colors, I couldn’t even grasp my mind around it. All I could think about was what primary colors I could mix together in paint to recreate that look. It was a beauty that human hands could never imitate, but I wanted to try, at least. The world had so many mysteries that no one would ever solve. Why couldn’t something happen to me? Why couldn’t I solve one of the world’s mysteries? I think that figuring out the colors of the dark storm clouds clinging to the dreary sky hanging above this lonely beach in Liverpool, England was a good start. Or at least good enough for someone like me. I was small, nothing. I wasn’t anything to anyone. Not anymore…

Suddenly, my eyes came back into focus as I regained all of the feeling around my body. The soft, yet coarse sand below my body, gently holding me up. The thick, cold drops of water falling on my face, and my hands and arms. My damp dress and leggings draping my small, fragile body.

I blinked a couple of times, to see the waves a few feet next to my toes. The storm was getting worse. I stood slowly, and made my way to the steep climb back up to civilization. The rain poured down on my back, and made me shiver slightly. When my feet finally felt level ground, I also felt eyes on me. People rushing into pubs and houses, covered with rain coats and news papers over their heads. They all thought I was strange, I knew. I mean, who else went to the beach in pouring rain just to think? I even thought I was strange, but I didn't care. When you have such a bad family, every one knows who you are, and no one’s mouths are virgin to my name, or my father’s name for that matter. No one mentions my mother. It’s almost a sin. She put a disgrace on my family, which basically includes, well, me.

I brushed the thought behind me. Those skeletons needed to stay, forevermore, in my closet. Everyone’s entitled to secrets that are so personal they don’t have to share. Though, these secrets were secrets that everyone knew. So I guess you wouldn’t consider them secrets.

I ignored everyone’s glares and chatters, and walked calmly back to my house. It was a fairly long walk, about 2 and a half kilometers, but I didn’t mind. Everything was too far away from 23 Forthlin road. At least I could take bus to my work. The Cavern, a pub, and at night a club, was in downtown Liverpool. It was a fun place to work, but not very expensive. At least, for supporting two people, it wasn’t. If I was living on my own, it might be easier. But the dead weight I referred to as ‘mother’ cost me a lot. Sometimes she’d show up with money, and wouldn’t explain where it was from. I didn’t ask questions. I was a happy camper if she didn’t spend a week’s hard earned wages on booze and drugs.

Finally, just as my mind was cooling down and my feet were starting to ache, I walked up the wet cobblestone stepping stones to my front door. It wasn’t the richest neighborhood, but it was my castle. I will always remember my dad telling me when I was little, “Lizzie, you’re my princess. You will always be my princess, and this is our castle. But still, I always want to be your king, okay? Just like our last name, Kingston. Just, tell me if anything bad happens, okay? And don’t blame your mom, she’s still the queen of this castle.”

Yeah, queen she was, but queen of what? Queen of gin? Maybe. Queen of me? Not a snowball’s chance in hell. My dad will always be my king, though. Always. I missed the way he called me Lizzie… now all I heard was “ANNA ELIZABETH KINGSTON. GET THE HELL DOWN HERE.” Most people just called me Anna, though.

The cold wood on the front door creaked under my fingers as I pushed it open, stepping inside and shutting it. I wiped my feet on the rug and ran upstairs, peeling off my drenched clothes and sliding on some warm ones. Then, I ran downstairs and put on a pot of tea, while I ran over to a mirror and started combing through my hair with my fingers. Small drops of water slid down my forehead and dripped onto the floor. The tea pot howled at me, and I ran on my toes over and grabbed it, pouring it into a mug and drinking it quickly, gasping afterward due to the pain radiating from the roof of my mouth. I ignored it, blew, and took another sip.

I needed the energy. I was working a night shift tonight, just to see some boys from around town that were due to record an LP. It was big news for Liverpool, not me, but I wanted to see what all the noise was about. One of the boys I had known since I was a toddler. He lived across my street, in the same kind of boring town house I did. We used to be good friends when we were younger, but the usual ‘growing up’ deal split us apart. He made friends with more boys, and I made friends with, well, not very many but still existent girls. We still talked sometimes, though, but not very much.

I bounced up and down on the balls of my feet until the entirety of the warm liquid disappeared, and then I set it in the sink and bounded up the stairs.

After applying the usual make-up (light black eye liner and mascara), I quickly changed into my waitress uniform, and twisted my long, auburn hair into a ponytail. I looked myself over really fast and scowled, grabbing my coat. Just as I walked outside, the rain suddenly stopped. I smiled to myself lightly and breathed in the cool, humid air that the rain left behind. It brightened my mood slightly, so I walked with a little rhythm down the path and onto the road.

Suddenly, a bright light caught my eye. The sun had popped out from behind a cloud. I wanted to wave at it and welcome it warmly, but I didn’t like the idea of a straight-jacket very much. Especially one that I might inflict upon myself.

“Hey, Kinggy!” A deep voice called from my left. I blinked and turned quickly to see a smiling face that I hadn’t seen in a while.

“Oh hey, Carty!” I waved and smirked, walking over to where he was loading an amplifier into the back of an old, beat up car.

Paul was a very attractive man to most people, with very defined features, and gorgeous, unique slanted, big eyes. His shaggy brown hair fell in his face in a very adorable kind of way, the kind of way that would make most girls swoon all over themselves. He had dew on the tips of his eyelashes from the rain still, and his hair was damp and dark. His slightly tight jeans and leather jacket defiantly made his impeccable body look very stunning. He was over all a very… gorgeous man. It disgusted me. I mean, not that he was ugly, or anything close, but I’d grown up with him. He was kind of like a cousin, I guess. Not quite brother like, but still close, in a way.

He set down his amp and leaned against the car, brown, shaggy hair falling into his face.

“So, how’ve you been lately? Haven’t seen you round the Cavern.”

I smiled and nodded, walking over close to him.

“Yeah, I got a day job. But I’m working tonight… some little band caught my attention.”

He grinned at my comment.

“So… congrats! I’m sooo proud.” I laughed, hugging him. He wrapped his arms around my waste and rested his head on my shoulder. A gesture I hardly would have dreamed he’d do. We hadn’t been this close since we were in 2nd year, and I tripped and fell on him in the snack line, spilling milk all over his sweater. We were both crying and it was a slight mess.

I smiled at the memory, and gently pushed him back.

“Thanks, yeah. It’s unbelievable, ey? Man, I haven’t talked to you in forever.”

I nodded, and looked at his watch.

“Damn, I have to get to work. I’ll see you at the gig, righ?”

He nodded, and I smiled and turned on my heel, walking away quickly. I didn’t want to send him the wrong message. He was… Paul, for one thing, and for another, I really didn’t need a boyfriend now. I needed to support myself and my… queen.

By the time I got to the bus stop, I was in one hell of an off mood.