To Me You Are My Life, My Soul Companion
What's Been Done Can't Be Taken Back
*Normal POV*
Finally, that sign that said 'Welcome to Michigan' came into view, indicating that my endless journey has in fact reached its end. It was bad enough that the trip was literally long in distance, but it didn't help that Synyster, or I guess I should say Brian was always on my mind!
But after all the good times that he and I have had together, the bad ones just seemed to totally engulf them and erase them from my mind. My thoughts with myself were interrupted when my cell phone rang 'Trashed and Scattered,' note to self: change ring tone.
"Hello?" I asked into the receiver.
"Heyyyy Sammie! Where are you at?!"
I pulled the phone away from my ear for a minute with slight laughter and replied, "Hey Janet, umm I'm almost at St. Clair Shores, so I should be at your apartment in like 5 minutes ok?"
"That's great! Oh, before I forget, we just finished decorating your new room!" My new room? I suddenly felt guilty for some reason.
"Oh, Janet, you didn't have to get me my own room...I could have just slept on the couch - I mean this is kinda last minute..."
"Oh, c'mon, Sam, you had a rough time and needed a place to stay - it makes perfect sense! Now stop trying to make me feel bad and just hurry up and get here, ok? Love ya, bye!" Click.
I sighed as I put the phone back down and turned onto Jefferson Avenue. As I parked my car and grabbed what I could, I looked out to see their apartment was right across from the Jefferson River. Well, at least I'll still be close to the water...
I rang the bell to their room and heard someone yell, "She's here!" and then there was some shuffling and finally someone answered the door: Janet. She smiled real big and helped me carry my stuff inside. Apparently, Janet and Jeff weren't the only ones in the room...actually to be exact there were at least 10 other people in the room.
Janet and I carried my boxes to my room and I was stunned with what I saw: the room was crimson red and looked just like my old room at my parents' vacation home! I immediately smiled and wrapped my arms around Janet giving her a huge hug of appreciation.
"I love it!" I told her. She smiled and was relieved that I liked it. Maybe this won't be so bad here after all...
An hour or two later, after meeting a bunch of new people, I found myself laying on my bed staring at the ceiling...just thinking. Is it normal for someone's life to be this messed up and altered?! What are the chances that I would ever fall in love with the one guy that ruined my life?!
And even when I think about what he did to me a couple of days ago and what he's done to me when I was 16, I just can't seem to forget the past couple of months. It didn't really help that half the things I brought with me from there were all of my birthday gifts...
I sighed as I tried to think of anything but him, but them, but those memories. As I closed my eyes attempting to relax, my phone went off...ringing Saying goodbye, this time the same old story. Seeing you cry makes me feel like saying sorry. Saying goodbye-.
"Hello?" I asked, stupidly not looking at the caller id.
"Hey, Sam, I...I didn't think that you would pick up..." Shit - it's Brian! Damn it why did I have to answer?
"Well, ya know I probably wouldn' have if I would have looked at the caller id..."
"Listen Sam, I need to talk to you. I had no idea what I was doing that night - do you know how many drinks I had?! The doctors told me that I was lucky that I didn't die from it all! You have to understand, I'm so sorry not only for that night but for before....you know I was going to tell you, just not like that. I-."
"Look, Brian, I'm sorry that you can't control your drinking, but you will never have any idea how much therapy and nightmares I had to endure because of that night. And I think I made it pretty clear when I told you to just fuck off!"
Then I slammed my cell phone shut and felt the tears pour down my face. At that moment a very small part of me considered calling him back and pretending like none of this ever happened, but I knew all too well that I can never go back there. I ended up crying myself to sleep, if you could even call it sleep...
*Synyster's POV*
We've spent an entire week looking for Sam and she's nowhere to be found. Adam told us any place that he could think of and she wasn't at any of those places. I'm kind of surprised that Adam is still living with us, after all that happened. But at the same time, I think that we are all thinking the same thing - somehow some way, we'll get her to come back.
I decided to call her, who knows, maybe she'll answer? Well, she answered, and even when I tried to tell her everything, she still wouldn't listen and hung up on me. I sighed as I put the phone down and looked at the place where her bed used to be. How could I have been so careless?
Finally, that sign that said 'Welcome to Michigan' came into view, indicating that my endless journey has in fact reached its end. It was bad enough that the trip was literally long in distance, but it didn't help that Synyster, or I guess I should say Brian was always on my mind!
But after all the good times that he and I have had together, the bad ones just seemed to totally engulf them and erase them from my mind. My thoughts with myself were interrupted when my cell phone rang 'Trashed and Scattered,' note to self: change ring tone.
"Hello?" I asked into the receiver.
"Heyyyy Sammie! Where are you at?!"
I pulled the phone away from my ear for a minute with slight laughter and replied, "Hey Janet, umm I'm almost at St. Clair Shores, so I should be at your apartment in like 5 minutes ok?"
"That's great! Oh, before I forget, we just finished decorating your new room!" My new room? I suddenly felt guilty for some reason.
"Oh, Janet, you didn't have to get me my own room...I could have just slept on the couch - I mean this is kinda last minute..."
"Oh, c'mon, Sam, you had a rough time and needed a place to stay - it makes perfect sense! Now stop trying to make me feel bad and just hurry up and get here, ok? Love ya, bye!" Click.
I sighed as I put the phone back down and turned onto Jefferson Avenue. As I parked my car and grabbed what I could, I looked out to see their apartment was right across from the Jefferson River. Well, at least I'll still be close to the water...
I rang the bell to their room and heard someone yell, "She's here!" and then there was some shuffling and finally someone answered the door: Janet. She smiled real big and helped me carry my stuff inside. Apparently, Janet and Jeff weren't the only ones in the room...actually to be exact there were at least 10 other people in the room.
Janet and I carried my boxes to my room and I was stunned with what I saw: the room was crimson red and looked just like my old room at my parents' vacation home! I immediately smiled and wrapped my arms around Janet giving her a huge hug of appreciation.
"I love it!" I told her. She smiled and was relieved that I liked it. Maybe this won't be so bad here after all...
An hour or two later, after meeting a bunch of new people, I found myself laying on my bed staring at the ceiling...just thinking. Is it normal for someone's life to be this messed up and altered?! What are the chances that I would ever fall in love with the one guy that ruined my life?!
And even when I think about what he did to me a couple of days ago and what he's done to me when I was 16, I just can't seem to forget the past couple of months. It didn't really help that half the things I brought with me from there were all of my birthday gifts...
I sighed as I tried to think of anything but him, but them, but those memories. As I closed my eyes attempting to relax, my phone went off...ringing Saying goodbye, this time the same old story. Seeing you cry makes me feel like saying sorry. Saying goodbye-.
"Hello?" I asked, stupidly not looking at the caller id.
"Hey, Sam, I...I didn't think that you would pick up..." Shit - it's Brian! Damn it why did I have to answer?
"Well, ya know I probably wouldn' have if I would have looked at the caller id..."
"Listen Sam, I need to talk to you. I had no idea what I was doing that night - do you know how many drinks I had?! The doctors told me that I was lucky that I didn't die from it all! You have to understand, I'm so sorry not only for that night but for before....you know I was going to tell you, just not like that. I-."
"Look, Brian, I'm sorry that you can't control your drinking, but you will never have any idea how much therapy and nightmares I had to endure because of that night. And I think I made it pretty clear when I told you to just fuck off!"
Then I slammed my cell phone shut and felt the tears pour down my face. At that moment a very small part of me considered calling him back and pretending like none of this ever happened, but I knew all too well that I can never go back there. I ended up crying myself to sleep, if you could even call it sleep...
*Synyster's POV*
We've spent an entire week looking for Sam and she's nowhere to be found. Adam told us any place that he could think of and she wasn't at any of those places. I'm kind of surprised that Adam is still living with us, after all that happened. But at the same time, I think that we are all thinking the same thing - somehow some way, we'll get her to come back.
I decided to call her, who knows, maybe she'll answer? Well, she answered, and even when I tried to tell her everything, she still wouldn't listen and hung up on me. I sighed as I put the phone down and looked at the place where her bed used to be. How could I have been so careless?