Life, When You've Got Nothing Left to Lose

After we had raided Hot Topic, we headed to the car. We didn't usually like Hot Topic, but they sold good merch, so I decided, why not?

It's very hard not to grab your lover's hand because you don't want anyone to know about you two. So I didn't hold Alec's hand like I knew he wanted me to; like I knew I wanted to.

"So... I guess we'll see you later?" Jenna said. I could see the hurt in her eyes.
We were all connected; we knew what everyone was thinking, feeling, and everything. And we felt it too.

"Aww, babe," I walked up to her and let her hug me and cry into my shoulder. Sometimes when my mother was a bitch like this, Alec and Mac would cry. But this time it was just Jenna. I assumed that Alec had already cried; my evidence being the fact that I stayed up later than I should've, listening to Alec cry in his sleep.
I can't cry. I tend to bottle up my feelings. Then at random moments, I'll burst out in tears. I hate myself for that, but it wasn't anything worth fixing.

"It'll be okay. I'll live." I comforted her.
"Really? Because my best friend living on the streets doesn't sound too peachy," Jenna said, not taking her head off of my shoulder.
Mac took Jenna's head and let her on his chest.

"We should go. SERIOUSLY, take care. I'll see you guys later."
Mac took off toward his car, holding Jenna in his arms while kissing her forehead.
Alec and I watched them drive away. Mac was an odd fucker. He wouldn't express his feelings unless he was drunk. He could be a cold hard bitch sometimes, but I loved him to death.

Alec looked at me. I didn't look at him, but I could feel his stare on my face. I turned to the right to face Alec and put a hand in his cheek, looking into his eyes.

"Were you drunk last night?" I asked. He chuckled, and denied it. I accepted this, because he said those three wonds. I LOVE YOU.
The only thing that I've been waiting to come out of his mouth. I-fucking-love-you.
That was all I needed. It took a day and a sleepover with him for it to sink in.

I think he realised that. And I felt a hand on the small of my back and lead me to the car. He pulled me in close to a hug.
I thought: Closer, closer.
He answered my wishes. My breasts pressed up against his chest, leaving no available space between us. He wasn't crushing me, and was being very careful, but he was hugging me tightly and close. He jumped into the backseat, and I came.
We got into the same position. I felt his mouth at my ear, and he kissed my jaw, trailing downward until he found my lips. And he kissed them lightly. I wanted more.
And he knew, like the friend that he was. He parted my mouth with his lips and sucked at my lips, both of us attempting to make the kiss beautiful. It turned out that Alec was a great kisser, and I wasn't so bad either. Hmm, Alec was (a) smart, (b) funny, (c) tall, (d) cute, (e) sweet, (f) and a good kisser. I didn't think that it all could come in such a nicely wrapped package. We made out quietly in the backseat. He would kiss me and suck on my tounge, and then letting me return the favor.
His hands came down to my hips. Alec pulled me closer. I pulled up and out of the kiss to wrap my legs around his body. I sat on him, slightly feeling his erection forming. How embarrassing! I thought. Did us girls have any give away? I didn't think so.
But all we did was kiss, for that matter.
After it got kind of gray outside, we laid in the backseat, with my head on Alec's chest; I laid on him.

This was how beautiful it could get. And I would lay there, feeling him breath beneath me.
Alec suddenly took in a deep breath, "We've got to get home. It's... HOLY SHIT."
I looked at the clock on Alec's dashboard.
7:57 PM

I hopped into the passenger's seat and Alec followed. He owned a large, old, bulky, but quite adorable red truck that smelled just like him. I was having doubts on whether it would turn on or not, but it did.

We sped toward his house, and when we got there, as usual, he got me to his window and opened it.

"Hey, beautiful," He smiled at me innoscently. I smiled back and climbed in.
"Are your parents asleep?" I asked. I didn't want to make much noise so that they could wake up and find his son harboring some hobo. Not to mention the friend of his that they hated.

"Nope." I sighed with relief and went to change. Alec was already in bed, only in boxers. I wore a pair of shorts, pretty short, and a tank top. His house was cold, even if he held me.
Well, Alec wasn't in bed, but he was laying on top of it, fully exposing his gorgeous body. His eyes were closed, but I knew that he sensed me when I sat on the bed.
I pulled his hand out and started to rub little circles with my thumb onto his hand. He smirked, not opening his eyes. Then I stopped.
"Wa-wait, that felt good."

So I rubbed some more circles, this time pulling him into bed. We pulled the sheets over on us. It reminded me of the good times when sleeping with your best friend wasn't a crime.

We would hide under the covers, in fear of getting caught because we were up too late. We would giggle when Alec's father walked past the door. And Alec would tickle me. Not for pleasure, but I soon found out that he liked to touch me, so we stopped hiding. It was awkward for me. I had fallen in love with him after he had. A long time after.

So we lay there with my thumb working on his hand while his left arm found its way around me. I was rubbing his right hand with my left hand, and I was laying to the left of him. We were reaching across each other to get Alec's hand and my body in Alec's grasp.

He succeded in his quest, and pulled me closer again, stopping the massage routine. We turned to face each other, and got lost in the eyes of the other sex.
I kissed him.

"Goodnight, I love you."

"I love you too. Sweet dreams."

We chuckled. My face buried in Alec's chest and our legs entwined. Alec had a strong grip on my body. He kissed my hair, and we fell asleep.