These Things I've Done

Kellin's P.O.V

I ran my fingers through my hair as she walked out. My heart was pounding, my hands were sweating, my body was cold. I was so close. It almost happened. I almost kissed her. And.. she.. she seemed like she wanted to kiss me back. Could it be maybe she does like me?

I looked back at the piano, biting down on my lip. I gently placed my fingers over the keys. What if I wrote her a song? Would that be too cheesy? Would I be too obvious? I sighed, pushing myself away. It was no use. I was stupid to think she'd ever feel the same way about me. The same as I felt about her. My heart raced at the mere sight of her. Her eyes, so big, so beautiful, just like her smile. Her smile, which warmed my heart and filled me with the happiness my life had been missing all these years. She was what was missing. She was what I wanted. She was what I needed.

I got up from the bench. My heart pounding just as fast as ever. Should I tell her? I should tell her. I should tell her how I felt, or else how would she know? What if she did feel something? Maybe? After all she made me this bracelet, right?

I looked down, gently spinning the bracelet. I traced the heart bead with my fingers. I sighed, smiling down to myself.

I had to tell her. I took a deep breath, shoving my hands into my pockets, and made my way down the hall where she went. I rehearsed what I was to say to her, over and over.

"Taylor, I.. I know.. I'm just your patient.. but.. being with you.. I.. I feel" I sighed, leaning back against the wall, hiding my face in my hands. I was going to make a complete idiot out of myself. What was I doing? Maybe now wasn't the right time. I continued down the hallway, my heart beating faster with every step. What if she laughed at me? I didn't want anything to be weird between us. I finally had someone here I could talk to. I finally had someone who understood me, what if I was just going to throw it all away.

I kept talking to myself as I slowly made my way down the hall.

"Taylor.. I just.. I want you to know how much I.. I just.."

Finally, I heard her voice again. I couldn't help but smile. But, then I heard Dr. Roberts. She was with him. There was no way I could tell her with him there. I bit my lip, getting to the doorway. With ever fiber of my being, I forced myself to knock on the door.

"T-Taylor?" I said, biting my lip. I felt my cheeks get red. I started biting my sleeve again as my heart pound out of my chest. She looked over at me, with her big beautiful eyes. I sighed, holding my gaze towards her. She smiled at me.
"Hey, Kellin.." She said. I felt my heart melt, just at the sound of her saying my name.
"Taylor, I.. I um.. C-Can I.." Dr. Roberts cut me off. He laughed.
"Seems like he needs a little more work in those group discussions, Taylor. He can't seem to make a full sentence."

My cheeks burned. I looked down at my feet. He was making fun of me.

"Taylor I.. I just.."
"Listen." he said "She's busy right now. Why don't you just.. run along." I felt my hands start to sweat again. I looked over at Taylor. So badly, I just wanted to hold her, kiss her, show her how she deserved to be treated. I could treat her like the princess she was. I sighed.

"What is it?" She asked.
"I.. I just.. I just wanted to tell you.. I.. I'm I'll.. I'll see you tomorrow." I quickly turned the corner, and bolted towards my bedroom.