A Girl With a Broken Smile

I stare at him for a moment, not sure what to say. By now I could hear my heart beating in my chest and my palms started to become sweaty. I’m really tempted to run at this point, but all I can do is stare at him wide eyed. This isn’t the first time I’ve been asked a question like this, I’ve actually gotten it a lot in the past. Usually I just play it off like I fell off a bike or something, but this time I can’t bring myself to speak. This time is different; he knows something.

“I... Blair was pretty drunk the other night and ended up hitting me in the mouth, because I wouldn’t give her anymore beer.” I lied.

Now it’s his turn to stare at me, his eyes moving between my own and the cut I tried to hide. It’s like he’s studying me; he knows I’m lying. Maybe he’s waiting for me to crack or maybe he too can’t bring himself to speak.

Finally his lips part, but only a sigh comes from them. With my head hung low I slowly slide into the booth across from him, not daring to look up at him. I can feel his eyes still on me, but I don’t dare move or say a word; I just wait.

“Anna...” He breathes. Slowly I glance up at him, like some sort of sad puppy. I’m scared of what he’ll say. “Anna, there’s no need to lie to me. I won’t make you tell me anything you don’t want to tell me, but please know that I am here for you.” He stops for a moment, looking me over again, before locking eyes with mine. “I won’t judge you.”

I doubt he knows just how desperately I want to break down and tell him everything. How all I want is to be held and be told that everything is going to be okay. But I can’t and everything won’t be okay.

“I’m not lying.” Is all I can say before glancing away from him again. I knew this was a bad idea.

Matthew lets out another sigh, but this time he sounds annoyed or angry. I wait a few minutes, but he doesn’t say anything else, I can’t help, but to wonder what he’s thinking. Slowly I glance up at him again, but he’s no longer looking at me. His head is lowered, chocolate colored hair hiding his face. One elbow is propped up on the table, two fingers pinching the bridge of his nose as if he has a headache. My head tilts to the side in confusion.

This has never happened before. Usually when people ask me what happened they give me a puzzled look, but drop the subject and go on with their lives. I didn’t understand why he wanted to know the truth so badly, why he seemed to care so much. He didn’t know me, we weren’t friends or even acquaintances really. We met once, and he happened to give me a job, but that’s it, that’s where our relationship ended. So why did he want to know so badly?

“Matthew...” My words are soft and slowly I lower my head to try to meet his eyes, but his are closed. He doesn’t reply.

“Matthew, I’m sorry, but... I just... I can’t.” I say, before shifting to get out of the both, but as I’m about to get up a strong hand grabs my wrist and makes me flinch. He must of noticed this, because his grip quickly loosened. I glance back at him, he’s finally looking at me again.

“Anna, you can trust me, I swear.” He pleads.

Slowly I sit back down, my eyes never leaving his. His hand is still around my wrist as if he’s scared I might try to run off again. I just didn’t understand him or what he was trying to gain from this. Was it really so hard for me to believe that someone truly, honestly cared about me? Why couldn’t I grasp that? I let out a heavy sigh, before slowly pulling my hand back and placing it in my lap.

“Matthew, listen. I’m really grateful that you want to help and all, but you can’t. There’s nothing you can do.” I say stiffly. I now know for a fact that he knows.

“Why? Why can’t I at least try? I know we don’t know each other, but I want to help you Anna. No one deserves this. Please.” He’s begging now and it almost makes me sad.

“That’s exactly it though Matthew! We don’t know each other. You don’t know the things that I’ve done or the things that I could possibly do.” I practically screaming now and I can feel people staring at me. “I do deserve this.” I say much quieter this time.

“I don’t believe that Anna.” He pinches his nose again before letting out a frustrated sigh. I open my mouth to say something, but he cuts me off.

“If you don’t want my help then fine, but just know, whenever you do decided that you need me, I am here.” Now he’s sliding out of the booth. I want to grab his arm like he did to me, but I don’t, instead I just watch him walk away.

‘Great.’ I think to myself, ‘yet another person who is mad at me.’ Why did I always do this? Somehow I always managed to piss people off everywhere I went.

I stayed in the shop the shop for a while after he left, my mind filling with all sorts of things. I had no clue what time it was or how long I had been there, but it must have been hours, the sun was starting to set and people were making there way out of the store.

“Umm... Miss?” A deep voice pulls me from my thoughts and I jump.

“I’m sorry to startle you, but the store’s closing in a few minutes and you’ve been here all day and hadn’t ordered anything. I think it’s time for you to go.”

“Oh! Right, I’m sorry.” I apologize as I grab my purse and head out the doors.



‘Beep beep beep’

My alarm clock makes me awake with a jolt. I groan as my hand slams down on top of the button. Today was my first day of work, with Matthew. I was excited to finally have a job, but I was dreading seeing Matthew.

I shower quickly, through on a pair of black dress pants and a nice shirt, before making my way downstairs. Mark was still asleep which made it easy to slip out unnoticed. I was too nervous to even bother eating anything, besides, I really didn’t want to wake Mark.

About twenty minutes later I arrived at the pet store and made my way inside. No one else was in the store this early, which made it easy to find Matthew. He was in the back of the store, organizing some shelves. Slowly I made my way towards him.

“Matthew?”

Slowly he turns, a small, but almost sad smile spreads across his lips as he gestures me to follow him.

“Good moring Anna, I’m glad to see that you made it.” He says softly, before disappearing into a backroom for a moment.

“Today I’m just going to have you go over these.” Matthew says as he hands me a stack of papers. “It has the guidelines and everything in them, but if you have any questions, don’t be afraid to ask.”

I nodded, as I quickly take the stack from him and take a seat at the desk in the corner of the room.

“I’ll be stocking aisles three, four and seven today, so that’s where you’ll find me.” And with that he walks out, and I start reading.

Hours go by and I’m finally finished with my papers. I could have probably been done a few hours ago, but I wanted to take the time to read everything carefully and fully understand it before finding Matthew. Which is what I did shortly after.

I glance down each aisle, my eyes searching for him, but coming up short. Only one aisle remained and I had yet to find him. Maybe he left? I slowly peek around the corner and what I saw almost made me gasp.

There he was, his arms wrapped around a tall beautiful brunette.