Do I Turn Out Alright?

[Sapphire]

As the days winded down and it grew closer and closer to tour, I tried to ignore how nervous I was. There was so much that I had to get done before we left and Alex was no help at all.

"Why am I doing your laundry?" I question him as he lounges on his back on his bed while I stand at the end, folding a basket of laundry that I had just washed.

"Because you love me and you don't want me to smell during tour because you know I will not wash my own clothes." He explains, grinning at me as he rests his arms behind his head.

"Sadly, you are correct. Though you smell bad all the time anyway, I think it's just you." I joke, giggling as his mouth drops open in shock.

"I do not smell!" He argues, making me giggle again.

"You kind of do, babe." He then jumps up, lunging at me. I squeal and laugh as he spins me around, slamming me down onto the mattress, causing me to giggle more.

"Take that back!" He yells, straddling me as he pins my hand down above my head.

"Never! You smell, Alex!" I yell right back. He pouts and shakes his head. He then leans down, pressing his long hair into your face. "Alex!" You yell, giggling. "Get your smelly hair our of my face!"

"Not until you tell me that it smells good!" He yells back.

"What is going on here?" We jump and turn towards the door where none other than Matt is standing, his eyebrows furrowed together as he looks at us. For a second I feel as if I have been caught and should feel guilty, but then I remember that Matt is my ex, not my current boyfriend, Alex is.

"She said I smell." Alex tells him, pouting as he releases my hands finally but continues to sit on me.

"Alex," I whine, trying to buck him off. "Get off of me."

"Not until you say I don't smell." He tells me, making me continue to pout.

"Fine, you don't smell." I say, finally giving in. He grins and jumps off of me. I sit up, shaking my head at him.

"I know I don't." Alex says, leaning over to peck my lips before the both of us stand up, remembering Matt who still stood in the doorway. "So, what's up, Matt?" He asks. His arm wraps around my waist, pulling me against him, as if staking some kind of claim. I just stand there awkwardly.

"We're having a meeting about tour. I guess you forgot." Matt says awkwardly.

"Oh yeah. We'll be down in a second." Alex says. Matt nods and walks away. I turn and look up at Alex who is trying not to laugh. "Was that awkward or was that just me?" I laugh and shake my head.

"I told you being around him would be awkward. Come on." I take his hand and pull him from the bedroom, down to the living room where it is packed with the other band and crew members. I walk over to the couch and turn, pushing Alex down into the only free space before sitting down in his lap.

We spend the next half hour or so listening to Matt go over things about the tour. He gives the same speech before every tour. It used to be cute but now after hearing it so much, it's gotten annoying. You tune it out as Alex begins to nuzzle your neck, making you smile. You try to push him away but he continues.

"As always, there will be no sex on the bus, out of respect to the others there who do not get to bring their girlfriends with them." Matt says this directly at us. Alex finally lifts his face from my neck and narrows his eyes at Matt.

"Oh, so it was okay for you to have sex on the bus but now that I'm the one having sex with your girl, it's not allowed?" Alex spits at him. Matt glares at him. I shift uncomfortably, as does everyone else in the room, unsure of what to do or say.

"This has nothing to do with who is having sex with who, it's not allowed." Matt growls, his teeth clenched.

"But it was when you were with Sapphire. I can't even begin to count the number of times I've heard the two of you having sex over the last 3 years."

"Alex, stop." I tell him, wanting this to end.

"Yeah, well it turns out that you were having sex with her at the same time!" Matt yells back. I stand up finally.

"Will the both of you just stop! We will not have sex on the bus, Matt. There, end of story. End of meeting." I turn and stomp off, going upstairs. I hear everyone break into nervous chatter as I go up the stairs and into my bedroom.

Over the last few days I have taken to decorating it, I painted the walls a dark purple and got some cute lamps that hung from the ceiling. I also have a shelf above the bed that has one picture of Alex and I, a picture of Jack and I, and then a picture of the entire All Time Low band and crew. My bedding and curtains matched the wall. I loved this room. I was glad that Alex let me have free reign in here, it made it easier to leave the house I had made my own when I had a marvelous room like this.

I slammed the door shut after me and went to sit on the edge of my bed, my face in my hands. If this is what tour was going to be like then I was seriously considering not going. I couldn't handle two months of this.

"Babe?" Alex's voice came from the other side of the door. "Can I come in?"

"Yeah." I respond softly. The door opens slowly and in walks Alex. I look up at him, glaring slightly. He sighs as he steps in shutting the door after him.

"I'm sorry." He whispers, leaning against the door as he slides his hands into his jeans pockets.

"Is that how all of tour is going to be?" I ask him.

"No, I just.. it set me off that he was allowed to have sex but all of a sudden it's not allowed on the bus." He explains, making me shake my head.

"If you two are going to act like that during the entire tour, then I'm not going." I tell him honestly. He sighs and comes to sit beside me.

"It won't be like that during the entire tour, I promise." He vows, looking over at me to smile.

"I'm serious, Alex. Five minutes of the three of us being in the same room and crap starts." I say, shaking my head. "Maybe it would be better if I stayed home. At least for this tour." Alex shakes his head, sliding closer to me and putting his arm around my waist.

"It will be fine, I promise." He says but I shake my head.

"How do you know that? How do you know that every day isn't going to be like that? You don't." I tell him. I just couldn't handle it if things were always like that. Tense, awkward, stressful. Tour was bad enough, no one needed that as well.

"Come on, everything will be fine. If it get's too much we can just go take a walk and relax." Alex insists.

"Fine." I say, giving in. I really did miss tour and couldn't wait to be back out. It would be easy enough to stay away from Matt for the most part.

"Good. I need you on tour with me." Alex says before leaning over to press his lips to mine. I smile and kiss him back, turning so we weren't twisting so much. I bring my hand up to rest on his cheek, deepening the kiss as my tongue sweeps into his mouth to meet with his. Kissing Alex, even after being able to do it everyday and as much as I want, every kiss was still like it was our first. "Is it time to christen this bed yet?" He mumbles against my lips, making you giggle. Even though I had been with Alex for a week and a half or so now, he and I still hadn't had sex, though he pushed for it. I wanted to wait and have things be special, do things right this time around.

"No, Alex." I tell him. He pouts but kisses me again anyway before we stand up.

"Come on, let's go see if there is anyone left in my house and if they are, kick them out or make them buy me food." I laugh and allow him to take my hand and pull me from the room. When we step back into the living room we see that Jack, Rian, Danny, and Matt are still here. Matt was on the phone standing off to the side, mumbling so I couldn't hear what he was saying. "Someone feed me." Alex says. Before anyone can respond, Matt hangs up the phone and turns towards us all.

"So, I should inform you all that Angela is joining us on tour." He says, his eyes trained on me. I feel my blood run cold.

"Why?" Alex asks, glancing over at me.

"I want her to, we have space, and she could help out with merch." Matt gives me a smile.

"Yeah, you are right, she could help with merch, because I'm not going." I rip my hand from Alex's and turn, grabbing my keys and walk out of the house. I hear Alex begin yelling at Matt but don't stay to hear what he's saying. I get in my car but don't start it, I instead put my face in my hands. Why was Matt doing this to me? I mean, I get it, I cheated on him, I left him for Alex, but technically he left me for her too.

I was just so sick of this game with Matt. I just couldn't do it anymore.