To Be Alone With You

The house was empty, just me and her in my mess of blankets. Shane had a concert or something at school that everyone else had gone to, leaving me and Josselyn to use the time alone to our advantage. I’d waited for so long to just be alone with her, and the time had finally come.

“What do you want to do?” I asked her as we came through the garage door, the house coming to life at the flick of the light switch. As soon as the words left my mouth, I was hit with a light pop squarely between my shoulders. Upon snapping around, I discovered the source was Josselyn, wielding two Nerf guns in her small hands. The sweetest smirk you ever saw appeared on her lips before she shot another bullet straight into my stomach.

“Where the hell did you find those?” I questioned through a laugh, trying to dodge another bullet she shot at my chest and failing miserably.

“The garage,” she replied coolly. “Think fast.”

And with that, she tossed me one of the guns before darting into the depths of the house, turning on lights as she went. I shook my head in wonder as I watched her figure disappear behind a couch. Only Josselyn. It wasn’t until she hit me right between the eyes that I snapped back to reality, lunging into the house and towards the spot she staked out behind the couch.

We chased each other around the house for what felt like hours, ducking behind various objects and taunting with poked-out tongues and wriggling eyebrows. Josselyn tumbled like an expert spy behind walls, spinning out at just the right moment to target me right in the heart, the way she always did. She always had her gun aimed right at my heart, and she never really realized it.

“Some James Bond you’ve turned out to be,” she teased, running up the stairs and shooting at me from the top step, never missing once.

I covered my head with my arms, attempting to take it like a man. “Where did you learn to shoot like that? Jesus Christ!”

“Casey and I have a membership to the shooting range,” she explained. Just as I looked up to her, she shot me one final time, barely skimming the top of my shoulder. Then she proceeded to raise her gun to her lips and blow, clearly pleased with herself.

“Oh, you’re asking for it,” I growled through a grin, tossing my gun aside before sprinting up the stairs at full speed. Wrapping my arms around her, I brought her to the ground, pinning her beneath me. Her blue eyes were wide and dancing, the vein in her neck showed her quickened pulse. Slowly, I moved to press my lips to hers so lightly, they hardly brushed.

When I pulled back, she smiled the slightest smile I’d ever seen and whispered, “Kiss me again.”
So I did. I kissed her and I kissed her, my hands tangled in her endless dark waves. The feeling of deep and uncontrollable want rose in my chest as her fingertips edged beneath my shirt along my spine. Something inside me needed her. Josselyn Stevens was irresistible, from her laugh, to her hips, to the way her teeth nipped at my lips when I kissed her deeply.

“Let’s take this somewhere more comfortable,” I suggested hopefully. When she nodded beneath me, I could have ran to my room right then. But I attempted to keep my composure, stalking to my room casually, glancing at her over my shoulder.

It was dark, the only light in my room coming from a candle Josselyn brought up from the kitchen. It bobbed with each breath from our expectant mouths, casting a beautiful, ghostly light on the wall. Our mouths crashed against each other over and over, creating a rhythm like a wave cresting and then gliding to meet the shore.

I wanted Josselyn like I’d never wanted anything or anyone before. I’d been so careful with her, so patient, always waiting like a gentleman for her to touch me, for her to kiss me, for her to show me the signs that she loved me. I could hardly stand to wait to have her entirely anymore, the shadow of her body straddling me on the wall almost sending me over the edge.

Slowly, I snuck my hand beneath her shirt to the button of her jeans, popping it open in one swift move. Her eyes widened a little before that playful smirk developed and she returned to kissing me. Next came her shirt, the fabric floating from my hands to the floor next to us. It was moments later until I lost control of my hands, letting them explore her entire body freely, taking in the moans and shivers she released.

Her hands were all over me, tugging on my shirt, pulling it over my head, discarding it to the ground with a playful smirk. The kisses she trailed up and down my chest felt like wildfire on my skin, hot and entirely sensational. It took hardly any time at all for us both to be completely exposed to each other, every inch of our skin reflected on the others.

“John,” she murmured as my hand skimmed over her delicate curves. “I’ve never done this before.”
This came as a surprise to me, and I struggled not to show it. I had thought for sure someone had fallen victim to Josselyn’s sex appeal before me, but perhaps she hadn’t wanted anyone else. Suddenly her hands were still, rested firmly on my chest.

“It’s okay,” I murmured back. “We’ll take it slow.”

I couldn’t turn back now – we were so close. After a moment, Josselyn nodded, her lips curled into a coy smile. I kissed her roughly before rolling on top of her, everything finally coming together. Us, finally fitting together.

Her fingers dug just slightly into my back muscles, our breath changing paces entirely – now shallow and fast. She nipped at my ear as I pressed my chest against her, her skin ablaze. I had to remind myself repeatedly to keep it together, to take it slowly, for both of our sakes. She was so hard to resist, her lips parted in ecstasy as she reached her peak. I followed, collapsing onto her, laughing a little at just how amazing it all felt.

We curled together, her body fitting into mine like a piece of me that I had once lost and somehow managed to find again. My heart raced, thumping against my chest. It finally happened. We were awkward; we hadn’t known all the right moves or the right touches, but I told myself that would come with time. We finally culminated everything we’d been working towards in the silence of my room, just us coming together.

“I love you, John,” she hummed, reaching for my hand and lacing my fingers in hers.

“I know,” I breathed in response. “I love you too.”



“John-O,” a light voice beckoned from the darkness. “Time to get up, silly.”

I opened my sleep-heavy lids to see her in the doorway; ringlet curls up in a ponytail high on her head. I resisted the urge to groan and roll over at the sight of her, instead sitting up and giving her a weak smile.

“Hey, good morning Macy,” I mumbled, rubbing the dreams from my eyes. “Sorry I wasn’t up already. Who let you in?”

“I let myself in,” she chirped, skipping over to the bed and landing on it lightly. “The door was unlocked.”

I nodded slowly, realizing the implications of what she had said. No one was home at my house on a Saturday morning, the family out running errands and at my brothers’ various sports games. I was surprised by her level of comfort in simply strolling into my parent’s home, relatively uninvited. I told her the night before that I would call her when I got up the next morning. Clearly she got impatient.

“So, what do you want to do today?” she asked with a giggle, kissing my lips lightly. I shrugged, getting out of bed to grab a shirt from the closet. I’d hardly been home a heartbeat. Mostly, I wanted to lay in bed and watch TV with my friends from home.

“We could catch a movie?” she suggested, rolling onto her stomach. “I think that new movie with Ryan Gosling is finally out, we could go to that?” I glanced over at her before pulling a plain white v neck over my head, catching a glimpse of her full chest spilling out just slightly over the lacy edge of her top.

It wasn’t that I didn’t like Macy – that wasn’t the problem at all. She was extremely cute, adventurous, and extremely loyal. It had been months since we first met at a party at my friend Eric Halvorsen’s house, and she’d been chasing my tail ever since. She was persistent; she practically wouldn’t leave me alone for a while with her texts and calls. But finally I had broken down and gone on a date with her, and I decided that being with Macy was better than being completely alone.

Our relationship had never really been defined, and that was a definite problem. We spent most of the time dancing around each other, her wanting desperately to call me hers and hers alone, me wanting to be able to see other people. She was the security net that I could come home to at night. I hadn’t had anyone steady in so long, so, so long. Macy was certainly steady, albeit a little pushy.

Before I left, we were seeing each other every day, which more or less consisted of her showing up at my house and me not caring much about talking to her or doing anything with her, mostly just not being alone. But once I was gone, I began to lose interest, the road more of a companion than she could ever hope to be. Touring was like a mistress I couldn’t abandon, and gradually I stopped responding to her texts and by the time we reached New York, I’d essentially forgotten about her entirely. It came as a great surprise to me that she was still so bent on being with me, even though it probably shouldn’t have. Determination was Macy’s middle name.

It was wrong to be using her, and I knew it. She was a sweet girl with a good heart, and despite being a little insane; she would be good for someone somewhere. I was only keeping her around to keep me warm at night and to fight away the loneliness I’d been feeling for so long. Seeing her lying on my bed so expectantly, her shiny lips spread into a wide smile as I attempted to fix my hair, I knew she felt more for me than I ever would feel for her. Ever since I returned from New York, I would rather be alone than spend time with her. She was driving me crazy.

I went to my drawer to grab my old watch, the one I had left behind when I went on tour so I wouldn’t manage to leave it behind, the way I always managed to leave something behind. But as I reached in for it, I caught sight of a downturned picture frame at the back. My heart dropped, immediately reminded of the pain I’d endured just days prior. Suddenly, I had a complete change of heart.

“Alright, Mace. Let’s go.”

She was a beautiful distraction, and at the moment, that was all I needed.