It Just Might Be Me

"Allison O'Rourke get out of bed. Now." Lily scolded at her best friend.

"What's the point."

"What's the point? It's been a month and you haven't done anything. This isnt the end of the world." lily yelled.

She immediately felt sympathetic when she saw tears roll down Allies face.

"Shh, sweetie." Lily apologized.

"We have studio today. You need to be into it." Lily started "Have you written anything new?"

Allie nodded. "I actually wrote something for the new album.'

"Good!" Lily smiled.

The two got dressed and headed over to the studio. It was the first time she had left her apartment since the breakup. She hadn't even left for Christmas.

"Hey Al, How are you?" Kyle asked sympathetically, pulling Allie to his chest.

Andy followed suit and did the same.

"Allie has a new song" lily piped up, as the band breathed a sigh of relief.



I bet this time of night you're still up
I bet you're tired from a long hard week
I bet you're sitting in your chair by the window
Looking out at the city
And I bet sometimes you wonder about me

And I just want to tell you
It takes everything in me not to call you
And I wish I could run to you
And I hope you know that every time I don't
I almost do

"That was beautiful." Kyle admitted as Allie wiped tears from her face.

"Please don't cry." Andy said sadly.

She sniffled. "It's so hard."

"I know it is, but you're better than him. You don't need him."

"Yes... I do." She replied sullenly.

"You lived twenty two years without him."

"And i was miserable that entire time. You know how happy he made me."

Andy sighed. "yeah, but look how sad he made you."

She shrugged and cleared her throat.

"We have an album to record."

-

"I miss my girlfriend." Phil whined, and Austin scoffed.

"Yeah, me too."

"Sorry." Phil muttered.

"Its whatever." Austin replied sulkily.

"I still can't believe you fucked it all up." Phil said, glaring at his best friend.

"I fucking hate Crissy, and that fucking dumb bitch Anika." He groaned.

"Yeah, we all do, but what's done is done." Phil said as they exited their plane.

"Being in New York is weird as fuck right now."

Phil shrugged, but immediately smiled when he saw Lily at the gate. He ran to hug her and Austin stood awkwardly with Alan, Aaron and Tino.

Lily hugged each member, but scowled at Austin.

"Lily-" he started.

"Fuck off." She growled.

He muttered an apology as Phil butted in. "Be nice, Lil."

Lily spat an apology at Austin and walked with Phil, leaving him alone.

"Austin, i'm sorry." Lily said, minutes later, walking away from Phil to join Austin.

"I should be the one apologizing."

"Yeah but i'm not the one you should be apologizing to." She sighed sadly.

"You don't think i've tried?" Austin whimpered.

"I know you have. She's sticking to her guns." Lily said, Austins face falling.

"I'm gonna drag her to your show tonight."

Austin scoffed. "She won't come."

"There are a lot of things people refuse to do that I make them do anyway." Lily winked, tossing a look at Phil.

"Ew?" Austin said confusedly.

-

"Hi Phil." Allie said quietly as he and Lily entered Allie's apartment.

"I missed you!!" He smiled, hugging Allie.

She missed Phil too, but she had secretly wished that Austin would've came with him.

"You're coming to the show tonight, right?" Phil asked with a cheesy grin on his face.

"If you want me to have a mental breakdown, sure why not."

"Okay, so it's settled!"

"No!" Allie half shouted, half laughed.

-

Hours later, Allie and Lily were standing at Irving Plaza waiting for the boys to come on.

Allie had said hello to Tino, Alan, and Aaron, but Austin was nowhere to be found.

She internally scolded herself for being hopeful. She knew he always liked to be alone and listen to music before he went onstage.

The opening bands were pretty good, but Allie was both dreading, yet anticipating seeing Austin.

Finally the lights went down and the band walked on, Allie bit her lip, knowing Austin would walk on last. As usual.

When he came on, her heart dropped.

She missed standing sidestage at their shows, lovingly greeted by her boyfriend after every show. Not this time.

They opened with O.G Loko and played The Storm next.

"This next song is brand new, probably the most honest song i've ever written. This one's called Repeating Apologies, and i'm just so fucking sorry."

Allie's stomach churned, and her eyes watered as she listen to the lyrics. As she heard the pain in his voice.

"Allie, please just take him back." Lily pleaded.

Allie was stern.

"Not a fucking chance."

As the show ended, Austin walked over to the two girls.

"Hi Allie."

"Hey."

"I didn't know you were coming."

"Neither did I."

"I'm glad you did."

"I guess."

"I'm sorry."

Allie wished he hadn't fucking said that. her chest tightened up, and her eyes classed over with tears.

"I know." She choked.

"I miss you."

"Stop Austin."

"Please, Allie." He pleaded as he grabbed her hand.

She looked at him with helpless eyes.

"I gave you your chance, and you blew it." She whispered honestly.

"Allie, i'm fucking sorry. I fucking need you. I can't live without you."

"Austin, don't." Allie sighed, desperately trying to avoid this confrontation.

"Oh no, you are not walking away right now."

"Or what?" She spat, fighting back more tears.

"Please, I love you."

"Bye Austin." She said sadly, before turning and walking to Lily.

Lily hugged her and mouthed "give it time." To Austin who was nearly in tears.

"I wan't him but I can't" She cried into Lily's shoulder.

"Cheer up, Al. He isn't worth it." Tino smiled, pulling her away from Lily and into his own arms.

She held Tino for a few moments, before looking back at Austin who was sulkily fiddling with his phone.

She let go of Tino and walked out of the venue in a sad haze.

She didn't even bother taking a cab. She just walked the sixteen blocks.

She escaped from Lily and disappeared into her own apartment.

She flung herself facedown onto her bed, screaming into a pillow.

Minutes later, there was a knock at her door.

"Lily, go away!" She screamed.

The knocking continued, and she threw her phone at the wall, cracking the entire screen.

She fumingly answered the door, and was greeted by Austin who had obviously been crying.

"Please let me explain."

"Get the FUCK out of my apartment." She screamed, loud enough for other people to hear.

He pushed her into the room and closed the door behind him, not wanting to attract unnecessary attention.

"Austin, you fucking asshole. You don't fucking understand what you did to me."

"I know. I'm so fucking sorry." He replied, his voice cracking.

She looked at him spitefully, as he bit his lip, before grabbing her and pressing his lips to hers.

She was slightly taken aback, but went with hear instincts and kissed him back.

He snaked his arms around her waist and opened his mouth. His hot breath on her face fueled the underlying lust rising up in her body.

"bedroom?" He whispered.

She just shook her head ash she climbed on top of him and kissed his neck.

"I'm so fucking sorry." he breathed as she sucked on his sweet spot.

"I'm still mad at you." She moaned as his hand massaged her lower back.

He flipped her over and climbed on top of her, pulling her top off, and her bra right after.

She gasped as he cupped her breasts with his cold hands.

Her back arched off of the couch as he continued his hand motions.

He smiled slyly, before pressing kisses to her chest, down her breasts, taking her nipple into his mouth.

She nearly screamed as he softly bit down.

He did the same to the opposite one, before pulling back up to kiss her lips.

"I owe you." He breathed into her mouth.

She nodded as he pressed kisses from her neck all the way down to her thighs.

He looked up at her, before kissing her inner thighs.

Her body raked with chills as he gently slid his tongue against her folds.

"Fuck, Austin." She whined lustfully.

He sucked on her sensitive clit, and she screamed loudly.

She was nearly shaking, and her mind was reeling.

He eventually got bored, and snaked his body up hers.

The feeling of his stomach pressed against hers turned her on even more.

"Fuck, I need you."

"It's been too fucking long." he sighed, as he thrust his hips into hers.

She moaned as she rocked her hips into his, matching his motions.

Minutes later, she reached her climax, followed by his.

She sighed at the sensation of him coming inside her, letting himself coat her walls.

"I love you. Don't ever fucking leave me again." She said softly, cupping his face.

"I could never."