Our Writer Couldn't Think of a Title So We Got Stuck With a Fall Out Boy Pun
Chapter 7
“Thank you for coming over, Mikey I’m freaking out.” Pete said as he opened the door and let Mikey in.
“…why?”
“Because I have a date with Patrick in an hour and I don’t know what to do or say or wear or anything and what if he gets freaked out and then never wants to go out again and he’s my boss kinda so then it’d be awkward and-”
“Pete”
“Yea?”
“Stop freaking out, if he were going to get freaked out by you he would’ve already and it doesn’t matter what you do or wear because he sees you every day so you’ve already made your first impression. And I doubt that Patrick’s one to care about that stuff anyways, from what you’ve told me.”
“B-but what if-” it’s a pity date and he doesn’t actually like me
“Everything’ll be fine, just open his door and pull out his chair and tell him he looks nice and all that stuff and you’ll be fine.”
“Yea, you’re right, I just need to like buy him flowers and be nice and gentlemanly and stuff and he’ll love me and then we can get married and adopt little African babies together and life happily ever after.”
“Yes I know your future life plans, but maybe you should find out if Patrick wants kids, like next time you guys go out, or the time after that because I feel like you might cry if you can’t get your little African babies.”
“They don’t have to be African, as long as Patrick and I can raise kids together. Oh! maybe we could get a surrogate mother and then we could have little Patricks running around! Oh my god Mikey I need this to happen!”
“Dude don’t you even try to get me involved in your weird little Patrick cloning, I want no part of that. Hey what time do you have to pick up Patrick?”
“Seven why?”
“Well it’s six fifty-five right now and I figure that it’ll take you longer than five minutes to get to his house so…”
“Shit shit shit shit, sorry can you lock up? I really need to leave like five minutes ago shit.”
“Yea just go woo Patrick or whatever, I’ll just grab some food from your fridge and then be on my way.”
“If I didn’t have to leave right the fuck now I’d so kill you but I can’t so bye.”
“Bye Pete.”
^^^^^^
Great, Pete was late, if he was even planning on coming in the first place, and now Patrick was stuck looking like an idiot just sitting and looking out the window at the sound of any passing car. Because yes Gabe was right (not that Patrick would ever admit it to his face) Patrick was very excited for his date but with each passing minute making it less and less likely for Pete to show up his excitement went down. Until he heard a knocking on the door, then it shot up again, along with his nerves because it’s been forever since he last went on a date and he’s never been on one with another boy so he has no idea of how he’s supposted to act or say or do.
“Hey um Patrick? you there? I know I’m late and stuff but could you let me in?” Pete said through the door.
“Oh! um yea, sorry.” said Patrick opening the door to reveal a very nice looking Pete, wearing a black polo shirt and shinny jeans that it looks like he stole from his younger sister or something. But either way they showed off his ass and god Pete’s his employee, Patrick shouldn’t be thinking about him in this way, but then again Pete did ask him out and Patrick won’t be his boss forever… what is he talking about, it’s just one date, he doesn’t even know if Pete’ll still like him afterwards.
“Yea sorry my friend came over and I just lost track of time and yea so you ready to go?”
“Yea lemme just get my wallet.”
“No, that won’t be needed tonight, I asked you out so I shall treat you.”
“Oh um if you’re sure…”
“I am I am c’mon lets go.” Pete said, grabbing Patrick’s hand and leading him to his car
“Wow you seem to be excited.” Patrick noted
“Well yea, this really awesome guy that I’ve liked for kinda a while decided to go on a date with me and he looks really nice, by the way, and I just want him to have a nice time, so yea.”
“Oh um thank you, you look quite handsome yourself, so where are we going?”
“Just this little Mexican place, it’s right up here, it’s kinda crap looking inside but it has the best tacos ever.” Pete said pulling up to a little hole in the wall place that had to be the place he was talking about. “here we are.” he said getting out and rushing over to open Patrick’s door for him, Patrick let him because it was nice to be taken care of for once.
“Thank you, kind sir.”
“You’re welcome.”
They went up and Patrick had Pete order for him because he really didn’t know what to get and after Pete paid they sat down and started to eat.
“So Patrick, do you ever want to have kids?”
“Um…I guess, like eventually and stuff but not anytime soon, why?”
“Well I was talking to my friend Mikey about it and he was saying that I should make sure that you want kids too because it’d suck if I did and you didn’t.”
“You talk to your friends about me?”
“Um yea, I mean Mikey’s like my best friend and I tell him about most things in my life and I was kinda freaking out a little about tonight so I called him over and yea I’m going to shut up now before you get creeped out and leave.”
“Pete, I’m not going to leave and I’ve heard creepier things, so don’t worry. I was kinda freaked out about this date too but now that I’m here with you I see that there’s nothing to worry about so stop worrying.”
“Why were you worrying?”
“Because I was afraid that you weren’t coming because you were a little bit late and yea.”
“C’mon Patrick, I’m not that much of a douche.”
“No you’re being a perfect gentleman.”
“Patrick can I um ask you something?”
“Sure anything.”
“Is this a pity date?” Pete said with a look in his eye than meant that he genuinely thought that it might be a pity date.
“No Pete, this isn’t a pity date, I really did want to go out with you, why did you think such a thing?”
“Because the way you mentioned it to Gabe made it seem like he pushed you to ask me and like you only did it so that he’d shut up…”
“No Pete, I had just told him about our conversation that we had a few weeks back and him, being Gabe, decided that that meant that we were meant to be together and it’d be a crime to humanity if I didn’t ask you about it.” Patrick tried to say offhandedly, though he didn’t know if he quite pulled it off.
“Really?” Pete said, getting happier by the second.
“Yea, he had some other reasons but I won’t bore you with them.”
“No I want to hear them.” Shit
“Just um something about you being in love with me or something and um sexual tension between um you and I, ‘s no big deal. ‘s not like I think he’s telling the truth or anything.”
“You don’t?”
“Well, I mean, I don’t really think there’s sexual tension between us, I think he was just annoyed because he hasn’t gotten laid in a while and I don’t really believe in love at first sight and we haven’t known each other that long, not long enough to love me so.” No Patrick he doesn’t love you don’t even start to think about that.
“I’ve known you for ten years remember.”
“Yea, but we never talked and I was eleven so either way there’s no way for you to love me, why are we talking about this again?”
“Because you were reassuring me that this wasn’t a pity date and then we started to talk about Gabe which is weird and then you decided that there was no way that I could love your adorable self and now we’re here.”
“‘m not adorable.” Patrick mumbled
“You’re totally adorable, like a little kitten and there’s no point in arguing with me because I have completely convinced myself of this and there’s no way to make me think differently, but feel free to try.” Pete said kinda like he was suggesting something
“Yea no I’m not going to even try, you done?”
“Yup ready to go to our next destination?”
“Next destination? I thought we were just going to get dinner.”
“Well yea, but while their tacos are good they don’t the best dessert so we’re going to go somewhere else, if-if that’s okay with you.” Patrick could tell that he really wanted to and he didn’t really like the idea of making Pete sad.
“Oh um yea, totally, I’m down with that.” down with that? really? could you be a little bit lamer?
“Sweet lets go.” Pete said, taking Patrick’s hand and leading him into the car and then backing out of the shopping center that the restaurant.
“So, where are you taking me now?”
“Eh just Coldstone, nothing too special, it’s just around the corner from here.”
“Wow you really had this all planned out huh?”
“Nah, most of it I just thought of when I was waiting for you to answer the door.” Pete said with a grin
“You shut up.” Patrick said as they pulled into a parking spot and Pete got out and raced to the other side to open Patrick’s door for him (and Patrick let him).
“Right this way.” Pete said, taking Patrick’s wrist and leading him inside. Luckily there wasn’t any line so they were able to just walk right up and order. “Hey Patrick, are we gonna do the super cute couple-y thing where we just get a bigger one and feed each other or are you going to be boring and just get your own?”
“We can share, but nothing fruity okay?”
“That’s perfectly okay with me, I’m not a big fruit person either.” Pete ordered a large sundae with so many toppings it made Patrick kinda sick just looking at it, but Pete looked satisfied with himself so it was probably very nice tasting. “Here you go kind sir.” Pete said handing Patrick his spoon and sitting down at one of the little tables that they have set up outside.
“Thank you mister.” Patrick said grabbing a spoon and cautiously taking a small bite.
“You loke ut?” Pete said through a huge bite of ice cream, boy did Patrick know how to pick ‘em.
“It’s very sweet but it’s nice, you come here often?”
“I dunno, every monthish? I would go more but it’s kinda expensive and it’s not like I have that much extra money to spend on stuff so”
“Oh that’s right, now I wish you would’ve let me at least help buy dinner.”
“No it’s okay I insist, I asked you out so I’ll treat you.”
“Okay fine, but next time I’m paying.”
“Next time?”
“Well um, yea if you wanna, I mean I’m having a great time and I assumed that you we-”
“Patrick?”
“Yea?”
“I’d love to go out with you again.”
“Oh, that’s good, so you ready to go?”
“Yup”
^^^^^^
“I had an amazing time tonight, thank you” Patrick said as they stood too close to be considered normal on his front porch.
“You’re welcome, I had a great time too, thank you for going out with me.”
“Any time…so you gonna kiss me?”
“Well if you insist.” Pete said with this big grin on his face as he leaned in and met Patrick’s lips with his own.
“…why?”
“Because I have a date with Patrick in an hour and I don’t know what to do or say or wear or anything and what if he gets freaked out and then never wants to go out again and he’s my boss kinda so then it’d be awkward and-”
“Pete”
“Yea?”
“Stop freaking out, if he were going to get freaked out by you he would’ve already and it doesn’t matter what you do or wear because he sees you every day so you’ve already made your first impression. And I doubt that Patrick’s one to care about that stuff anyways, from what you’ve told me.”
“B-but what if-” it’s a pity date and he doesn’t actually like me
“Everything’ll be fine, just open his door and pull out his chair and tell him he looks nice and all that stuff and you’ll be fine.”
“Yea, you’re right, I just need to like buy him flowers and be nice and gentlemanly and stuff and he’ll love me and then we can get married and adopt little African babies together and life happily ever after.”
“Yes I know your future life plans, but maybe you should find out if Patrick wants kids, like next time you guys go out, or the time after that because I feel like you might cry if you can’t get your little African babies.”
“They don’t have to be African, as long as Patrick and I can raise kids together. Oh! maybe we could get a surrogate mother and then we could have little Patricks running around! Oh my god Mikey I need this to happen!”
“Dude don’t you even try to get me involved in your weird little Patrick cloning, I want no part of that. Hey what time do you have to pick up Patrick?”
“Seven why?”
“Well it’s six fifty-five right now and I figure that it’ll take you longer than five minutes to get to his house so…”
“Shit shit shit shit, sorry can you lock up? I really need to leave like five minutes ago shit.”
“Yea just go woo Patrick or whatever, I’ll just grab some food from your fridge and then be on my way.”
“If I didn’t have to leave right the fuck now I’d so kill you but I can’t so bye.”
“Bye Pete.”
^^^^^^
Great, Pete was late, if he was even planning on coming in the first place, and now Patrick was stuck looking like an idiot just sitting and looking out the window at the sound of any passing car. Because yes Gabe was right (not that Patrick would ever admit it to his face) Patrick was very excited for his date but with each passing minute making it less and less likely for Pete to show up his excitement went down. Until he heard a knocking on the door, then it shot up again, along with his nerves because it’s been forever since he last went on a date and he’s never been on one with another boy so he has no idea of how he’s supposted to act or say or do.
“Hey um Patrick? you there? I know I’m late and stuff but could you let me in?” Pete said through the door.
“Oh! um yea, sorry.” said Patrick opening the door to reveal a very nice looking Pete, wearing a black polo shirt and shinny jeans that it looks like he stole from his younger sister or something. But either way they showed off his ass and god Pete’s his employee, Patrick shouldn’t be thinking about him in this way, but then again Pete did ask him out and Patrick won’t be his boss forever… what is he talking about, it’s just one date, he doesn’t even know if Pete’ll still like him afterwards.
“Yea sorry my friend came over and I just lost track of time and yea so you ready to go?”
“Yea lemme just get my wallet.”
“No, that won’t be needed tonight, I asked you out so I shall treat you.”
“Oh um if you’re sure…”
“I am I am c’mon lets go.” Pete said, grabbing Patrick’s hand and leading him to his car
“Wow you seem to be excited.” Patrick noted
“Well yea, this really awesome guy that I’ve liked for kinda a while decided to go on a date with me and he looks really nice, by the way, and I just want him to have a nice time, so yea.”
“Oh um thank you, you look quite handsome yourself, so where are we going?”
“Just this little Mexican place, it’s right up here, it’s kinda crap looking inside but it has the best tacos ever.” Pete said pulling up to a little hole in the wall place that had to be the place he was talking about. “here we are.” he said getting out and rushing over to open Patrick’s door for him, Patrick let him because it was nice to be taken care of for once.
“Thank you, kind sir.”
“You’re welcome.”
They went up and Patrick had Pete order for him because he really didn’t know what to get and after Pete paid they sat down and started to eat.
“So Patrick, do you ever want to have kids?”
“Um…I guess, like eventually and stuff but not anytime soon, why?”
“Well I was talking to my friend Mikey about it and he was saying that I should make sure that you want kids too because it’d suck if I did and you didn’t.”
“You talk to your friends about me?”
“Um yea, I mean Mikey’s like my best friend and I tell him about most things in my life and I was kinda freaking out a little about tonight so I called him over and yea I’m going to shut up now before you get creeped out and leave.”
“Pete, I’m not going to leave and I’ve heard creepier things, so don’t worry. I was kinda freaked out about this date too but now that I’m here with you I see that there’s nothing to worry about so stop worrying.”
“Why were you worrying?”
“Because I was afraid that you weren’t coming because you were a little bit late and yea.”
“C’mon Patrick, I’m not that much of a douche.”
“No you’re being a perfect gentleman.”
“Patrick can I um ask you something?”
“Sure anything.”
“Is this a pity date?” Pete said with a look in his eye than meant that he genuinely thought that it might be a pity date.
“No Pete, this isn’t a pity date, I really did want to go out with you, why did you think such a thing?”
“Because the way you mentioned it to Gabe made it seem like he pushed you to ask me and like you only did it so that he’d shut up…”
“No Pete, I had just told him about our conversation that we had a few weeks back and him, being Gabe, decided that that meant that we were meant to be together and it’d be a crime to humanity if I didn’t ask you about it.” Patrick tried to say offhandedly, though he didn’t know if he quite pulled it off.
“Really?” Pete said, getting happier by the second.
“Yea, he had some other reasons but I won’t bore you with them.”
“No I want to hear them.” Shit
“Just um something about you being in love with me or something and um sexual tension between um you and I, ‘s no big deal. ‘s not like I think he’s telling the truth or anything.”
“You don’t?”
“Well, I mean, I don’t really think there’s sexual tension between us, I think he was just annoyed because he hasn’t gotten laid in a while and I don’t really believe in love at first sight and we haven’t known each other that long, not long enough to love me so.” No Patrick he doesn’t love you don’t even start to think about that.
“I’ve known you for ten years remember.”
“Yea, but we never talked and I was eleven so either way there’s no way for you to love me, why are we talking about this again?”
“Because you were reassuring me that this wasn’t a pity date and then we started to talk about Gabe which is weird and then you decided that there was no way that I could love your adorable self and now we’re here.”
“‘m not adorable.” Patrick mumbled
“You’re totally adorable, like a little kitten and there’s no point in arguing with me because I have completely convinced myself of this and there’s no way to make me think differently, but feel free to try.” Pete said kinda like he was suggesting something
“Yea no I’m not going to even try, you done?”
“Yup ready to go to our next destination?”
“Next destination? I thought we were just going to get dinner.”
“Well yea, but while their tacos are good they don’t the best dessert so we’re going to go somewhere else, if-if that’s okay with you.” Patrick could tell that he really wanted to and he didn’t really like the idea of making Pete sad.
“Oh um yea, totally, I’m down with that.” down with that? really? could you be a little bit lamer?
“Sweet lets go.” Pete said, taking Patrick’s hand and leading him into the car and then backing out of the shopping center that the restaurant.
“So, where are you taking me now?”
“Eh just Coldstone, nothing too special, it’s just around the corner from here.”
“Wow you really had this all planned out huh?”
“Nah, most of it I just thought of when I was waiting for you to answer the door.” Pete said with a grin
“You shut up.” Patrick said as they pulled into a parking spot and Pete got out and raced to the other side to open Patrick’s door for him (and Patrick let him).
“Right this way.” Pete said, taking Patrick’s wrist and leading him inside. Luckily there wasn’t any line so they were able to just walk right up and order. “Hey Patrick, are we gonna do the super cute couple-y thing where we just get a bigger one and feed each other or are you going to be boring and just get your own?”
“We can share, but nothing fruity okay?”
“That’s perfectly okay with me, I’m not a big fruit person either.” Pete ordered a large sundae with so many toppings it made Patrick kinda sick just looking at it, but Pete looked satisfied with himself so it was probably very nice tasting. “Here you go kind sir.” Pete said handing Patrick his spoon and sitting down at one of the little tables that they have set up outside.
“Thank you mister.” Patrick said grabbing a spoon and cautiously taking a small bite.
“You loke ut?” Pete said through a huge bite of ice cream, boy did Patrick know how to pick ‘em.
“It’s very sweet but it’s nice, you come here often?”
“I dunno, every monthish? I would go more but it’s kinda expensive and it’s not like I have that much extra money to spend on stuff so”
“Oh that’s right, now I wish you would’ve let me at least help buy dinner.”
“No it’s okay I insist, I asked you out so I’ll treat you.”
“Okay fine, but next time I’m paying.”
“Next time?”
“Well um, yea if you wanna, I mean I’m having a great time and I assumed that you we-”
“Patrick?”
“Yea?”
“I’d love to go out with you again.”
“Oh, that’s good, so you ready to go?”
“Yup”
^^^^^^
“I had an amazing time tonight, thank you” Patrick said as they stood too close to be considered normal on his front porch.
“You’re welcome, I had a great time too, thank you for going out with me.”
“Any time…so you gonna kiss me?”
“Well if you insist.” Pete said with this big grin on his face as he leaned in and met Patrick’s lips with his own.