Survival

Tobias found us a new island. It was about half a day’s flight from where our spaceships were, but it seemed large enough to have a constant supply of animals for us to hunt every day. The plants were also very diverse, so he suspected that we should be able to sustain a living here. To the edge of the island on the south side was a selection of caves. They had their backs to the sea so weren’t as windy, and because they faced north they obtained the sun all day long. According to the few elders that were still alive, this was how Kasiens lived before they were forced to leave in spaceships. In the summer they would live wherever they wanted, usually sleeping under trees on small, secluded islands and enjoying the warmth. And once the weather became a lot colder, they’d locate suitable caves and rest in there, keeping their wings dry until it stopped raining so they could quickly hunt and feed. It was nice to know we were going back to how we were supposed to be living, because sometimes the spaceship felt so strange to me, even though it was where I had lived for as long as I could remember.

Once everyone was settled in and was starting to make new objects from resources on the new island, Tobias sent small groups back to the spaceship. For the sake of keeping my sanity, Toby didn’t let me go. He didn’t want me to see Brienne again, so ordered me to stay with the group and protect them in case the humans had somehow tracked us again. The warriors that did travel to our old home always brought back lots of items. Firstly it was essentials like the powder we made our protein drinks from, weapons, blankets and clothes, but it soon progressed into not so necessary items that just made life a little easier. We were told that our loved dead ones had been buried close to the ship and the families were officially told that the missing Kasien was dead. It was mainly because of that that the mood was so depressing. No one really minded living in a new spot, they just cared that some Kasiens were never being seen again.

We had always had the huge advantage of knowing our location was safe, that the humans couldn’t find us and attack. But somehow it had happened. Sylus suspected that they had started to follow us after battles, and slowly tracked our journey back. Cassius thought that they were more technologically advanced than us, so had some sort of machine that found our ship. Others believed that a warrior had given the location up, and those who didn’t like Otto considered that it was him, or one of his males. Unfortunately, the more popular opinion was that I was the warrior who had betrayed our race. I was much more recently captured, and I was the only one who was allowed to live. It was suspicious circumstances, and once again I was the talk of the group. I couldn’t really blame them, though. It wasn’t as if they had had the explanation that I had received from Tobias in regards to his feelings, or that they were there to witness everything. The conclusion they had reached was pretty logical, even though it was incorrect.

After the first week or so of visiting the spaceship, Tobias stopped going and stayed behind to look after everyone. He led the hunting group, and even helped to cook it afterwards. When he had free time, he played with the children and tried his best to keep their spirits high. Tobias was busy the whole day, and I rarely got to talk to him. That was all right during the start because I was too upset about Brienne to chat anyway, but once I had recovered and was moving past it, I wanted his company again. Toby and I had only just started to become more than friends, and I wanted to continue to explore it.

I finally thought I’d have a chance when Toby invited me to his cave for dinner. It wasn’t exactly private, considering there were quite a few other male warriors in the cave too, but at least most of them were outside keeping guard as the sun set. We were at the back of the cave, sitting on a blanket as Toby lit the fire. He was extremely skilled at it, and there was a hot fire before I knew it.

“That didn’t take long at all,” I remarked, feeling rather impressed. It took me much longer than that to get my fires started. We cooked our own meals inside the caves and kept the fires going throughout the night. It was more efficient that way, instead of having twice as many fires that each had a separate purpose. He pulled across the tray that had a hind leg of a boar on it, and I felt my stomach grumbling.

“Well enjoy it. There isn’t much dry wood anymore, so some are sharing tonight,” he mumbled while slicing into the meat. Once it was cut into small portions, he put it on top of the metal plate sitting above the fire and started to mix a sachet in water to create a protein drink. Toby had already insisted that he’d take care of the meal, so I didn’t offer to help.

“At least clean water is plentiful, right?” I asked, seeing a few males were glaring a little at me. I felt uncomfortable. Why were they looking at me like that?

“Actually, no. The stream is overflowing and muddy. We’re building rain catchers now, though, so that will be a huge help,” Tobias replied before handing me a cup. I set it down, feeling that the eyes were still on me and disapproving of all of this.

“Why is everyone looking at me like that?” I whispered, keeping my stare on the meat. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Toby briefly looking around the cave.

“Probably because supplies are low and I’m sharing mine with you, and because you’re in an unmated males’ cave,” Toby answered light-heartedly. I looked up and saw he had a big grin, and I couldn’t help but chuckle. I was just being paranoid.

“You’re right. I thought something else was wrong,” I admitted, laughing it off before I took a sip of my drink.

“Why would there be? Besides, I’m the leader, and I take care of my friends,” he shrugged.

“I don’t like how some are thinking that the attack was my fault.”

“It’s ridiculous,” Toby agreed as he started to flip the slices of meat. “Everyone needs to believe that you’re a good warrior and that you’ve done so much good for this race, because that’s the truth.”

“I feel like I’m always so isolated. The only Kasien who accepted me was Brienne, but now…” I trailed off, remembering all of the times that Brienne supported me. She was such a great friend… Toby put his hand on my knee and gave it a comforting squeeze. I met his eyes and saw his sorrow.

“Don’t start thinking about her memory again. She wouldn’t want you to be so upset about it, would she?” He had a point.

“No, you’re right…” I mumbled.

“Besides, I accept you. You’re not isolated from me,” Toby said in a much more cheerful tone, turning his attention back to the sizzling chunks of boar.

“But you’re always so busy. This is the first time we’ve sat down together since we arrived here. We don’t even get to take shifts together when it comes to guarding the island,” I explained before sighing. I lowered my voice and leaned in to him a bit. “I thought we were supposed to be… you know…” Having a new relationship together. But instead of becoming more than just friends, we were barely speaking.

“And we will, in due time,” he agreed. “Things have changed. We need to adapt to this new world and then focus on the smaller positive things.”

“I need this to keep me going, though. I’m not happy, at all…”

“I know how you feel…” Toby admitted as he served up the meat. He grabbed a handful of fruit from another tray and chucked it on my plate. Silently, he did the same for his own plate and I started on my food. I hadn’t realised he wasn’t happy either. Tobias was always so busy that I thought he was distracted enough to not even think about us. That was how it had come across to me. After we had had a few mouthfuls, he finally spoke again. “We could try and be subtle and have a date now, if you’d like.”

“Is that even possible?” I asked, glancing up at the rest of the cave. Most males were finishing up their own meals and starting to get comfortable under blankets for sleep. We already had a wall behind us, so all we had to do was hide behind the cooking contraption and keep our voices low. It would look like we were just being good friends, as we always had been. Toby’s hand slipped across to mine and gave it a squeeze, and I knew it was out of sight from the others. I smiled, suddenly feeling a lot better about life.

We chatted and finished our meals before Toby put his blanket across me to keep me warm. Once others had dimmed their fires and were sleeping, we talked in hushed whispers, sometimes falling into pleasant silences where we just held hands. We even kissed a few times, and each one felt better than the last. I eventually fell asleep next to Toby, and I had no shame whatsoever when I walked out of the cave in the morning. It didn’t matter that I had spent the night in the unmated males’ cave and would have rumours started by other females. I had bonded with Toby, and that’s all I cared about.