Learning Love

Dear Ilka...
no that doesn't fit right. does it? no. it's too normal you would find it in any other letter.
yes I'm writing a letter to Ilka and what's wrong in that? okay I have to admit it. it's not a normal letter. me, CC, the guy who sweared that he would never fall in love with someone, just did. and I'm writing a love letter to the one and only Ilka. who would have guessed that.
I tried out another line
hey sweetie
no then she wasn't sure if it was her. and what if she gave it to her... sister and I met her instead? fuck. that would be really fucking bad.
I had to find another paper.
I got up of my chair and got down the city and found a store where they were selling paper.
I looked around for a good one to write a love letter. maybe black? no it wasn't lovely and then I had to find a white pen... the white one? no too normal. the red paper? no hell no. but what about the light blue with silver stars? no. that was Andy who would use that to write a letter for Ashley.
finaly my eyes couch something. it was a light pink paper with small hearts in the right corner in the buthem of it. it was so perfect and more perfect was that I got a pen and some envelopes with it. I took it all. a one pen, a few envelopes and a lot of papers. I walked up to the disk and payed.
"you are writing a love letter?" the lady asked.
"eh yes..." I looked down as I felt my cheeks get red.
"oh. who's the lucky girl?" she asked.
"ehm... just a girl I've met..." I blushed more
"well... and she knows you?"
"yes..." why couldn't we just finish this convesation now!?!
"well then I may wish you good luck and I hope you're getting together" the lady smiled and I thanked her for the good wishes and walked home as fast as I could.

as I got home I went straight to the table and sat down with my new stuff and started thinking of how to start my letter. you think it's a piece of cake to write a love letter but sure as hell it's not. espechaly not if it's for a girl you doesn't really know. and who sure as hell doesn't love you back.
dear sweet Ilka
still so normal for a letter...
my Ilka...
no then again it's wrong. what the fuck am I gonna do? THINK CHRISTIAN FUCKING COMA THINK!!!
I was so desparete. I could at least call her! no I doesn't have her phone number..
then I felt my hand write something but I didn't notice. I was thinking about who I should call for help. and then the line 'wrote itself'
Dear gorgeous Ilka
beautiful line actualy. I smiled. that was the right. I wrote the rest of the letter and it end up like this

Dear gorgeous Ilka
you should know how hard it is to write this letter for such a beautiful, swet, funny, and kind girl as you.
I've wanted to write this letter for a long time. actualy since we met each other first time. it may sound a little scarry to you. I hope you won't mind too much.
what I'm writing this for is telling you that I love you with all my heart. I'd never thought I would fall in love but now I am. I'm falling in love with you Ilka.
I don't want to be scary to you. so I want something. what if we meet somewhere? in July 23rd at 2 pm I'll be waiting for you at cafe Sunshine. it is a central place and it won't be too hard for you to get there in time. if you don't want to meet me then don't show up that's all you have to do. if you don't show up before 3pm I'm leaving the place
hope to see you
your secret lover
by the way, I've never tried writing this kind of letters before so I'm sorry if it's not what you think of a love letter

I put the letter in the envelope and wrote Ilka's adress on it. then I send the letter and felt the heat in my cheeks as I did it.
now it was done. now I only had to wait for July 23rd