Lone Survivors

Daryl insisted he stayed outside alone, getting some fresh air to clear his head while keeping watch too. I let him. Since he was distracted, I didn’t want him to be outside where he was in potential danger, but I knew there was nothing I could say to change his mind. Everything was so clear now, why Daryl had come back to the prison and why he’d wanted us to be at a new level in our unique relationship. He’d actually thought we were having a child. It broke my heart that I couldn’t give him that, something that would make him a lot happier in this crappy time. Once I was inside I took Judith off Beth, allowing her to have some time to herself. She was more than grateful, and once I had fed the upset baby, I took Judith for a walk around the cellblock. The motion rapidly calmed her down.

“You’re good with her,” a voice drawled from the shadows. I turned and saw Merle was there, watching me carefully. My smile caused by Judith disappeared instantly.

“What do you want?” I asked, getting straight to the point. Merle didn’t usually speak unless he wanted something.

“Just wanna talk. Ya got a minute?” Merle replied as he walked forwards. Clutching Judith protectively to my chest, I gave a tiny nod. “I wanted to apologise for what happened at Woodbury. I was just carryin’ out the Governor’s orders, tryin’ to keep myself alive. That’s all it was. I didn’t actually want to touch my brother’s girl.”

“Whatever…” I mumbled. Merle didn’t seem too pleased with my response, so I took in a deep breath to start explaining. “I don’t care. Ya do what ya gotta do.”

“Yeah. Ya sure do,” he smirked, perhaps reminiscing. I looked back down at the baby, noticing her eyes were getting a bit droopy. “Have you taken the test yet?”

“Pardon?” I stammered. First Daryl and now the other Dixon? Why?

“The pregnancy test,” Merle repeated in a much lower voice. I didn’t reply so he sighed. “Daryl told me. That’s why I came here with him, because he said he might have a child on the way. I couldn’t get in the way of family.”

“I’m not family with you,” I stated. I trusted family, and I didn’t trust Merle yet.

“If you’re with Daryl you are,” he shrugged casually. I didn’t move a muscle, still not believing his words. “Look, if you can get along with my brother, you can get along with me. If he’s risking his life for ya, I’ll do the same. All I ask is you watch out for me too, and give me a little bit of trust. Otherwise, it won’t work.” I narrowed my eyes as I attempted to judge what he’d said. He was Daryl’s brother; he deserved the benefit of the doubt.

“Don’t screw anything up. Doesn’t take much to lose trust,” I remarked. Merle nodded with a serious expression, and I felt obliged to open up. “I’m not pregnant.”

“Oh. That’s a shame,” he said sincerely. I didn’t know if he was disappointed for me, Daryl, or even himself. “Maybe he’s got bad sperm. Ya might need mine.” Merle laughed afterwards, and I made an attempt to not take him so seriously. He was just being nice and joking around. I found myself chuckling along with him.

“What’s so funny?” Daryl called from behind me. I looked over my shoulder and saw him walking down the steps with a much more positive appearance. It was obvious he was glad we were getting along, and I was too. Maybe Merle wasn’t too bad after all.