If Only Tonight

Unfamiliar Territory:
Chapter Twenty Eight: Not Good Enough

There was nothing else he could do but stare in to those green depths, they were pulling him in to them.

Not taking any notice that he was leaning in, his mind was pleasently blank, his head inching closer to hers. Their faces were only centimetres apart, lips almost touching. He inhaled her sweet scent, running a hand through her silky hair, pulling her closer.

Their lips just about to touch-

With a jolt, Matthew woke up. Sitting up, and breathing hard, he turned to see if his roommates had woken up. Neither of them had stirred.

Moonlight streamed in to the room from the window. Oliver must have forgotten to pull the curtains, Matthew thought, amused at the older boy's forgetfulness.

His mind wandered back to the vivid dream, his mind always seemed to wander to her, catching him off gaurd each time. Turning to look at the bed that was between him and Oliver, Matthew saw her. The moonlight highlighting her delicate features. Her hair feathered across the pillow, one arm under her pillow, the other clutching her pink elephant. She was still wearing the gold heart locket he had given her. Matthew smiled as he saw this.

Unable to stop himself, Matthew got off his bed quietly, careful not to make any loud noises. Sitting on the ground beside Mia, Matthew watched as she slept peacefully. He could watch her forver, he thought. He saw as she turned, hair tumbling down her face, facing him but still in a deep sleep.

He couldn't resist the urge to push her hair back. Slowly and carefully his fingers gently pushed the hair off her face. Brushing his fingers across her cheek, he felt her cool soft skin. She was something so different and pure, he had never felt this way before.

I'm not good enough for her, Matthew realized. I can hurt her, he remembered the first half of the season. She could never be mine, he knew at once. Girls like Mia don't deserve to get hurt by guys like me...Matthew slowly withdrew his hand.

Suddenly Mia moved, her hand moving to hold on to his. Still she didn't wake. She seemed quite comfortable with his hand in hers.

Unwillingly, Matthew carefully pulled his hand away, but before getting up, he kissed his finger tips, brushing them along her cheek. He had to keep his feelings from getting the better of him, he admonished himself.

It's better to leave you alone, than to let myself take a chance with you...you'll only get hurt, he told her silently, knowing she would never know about the night. I'm not good for you, he thought as he caressed her cheek.

Standing over her, he knew all he wanted was right there in front of him. Too bad I can't have it, he thought, sitting back on to his bed. He watched her a little while longer, before lying back down and pulling the covers over himself.

Sweet dreams, Mia, he thought, as he looked over to her once more before turning to face the wall, hoping that sleep would find him sometime soon.

-----

"Late...yet again. I should've known it wouldn't last..." Mia muttered loudly, as she chewed on the end of her pen. Sitting at her desk, she glanced at the clock, the time grating on her nerves.

"You don't sound so happy." She heard him say from behind her.

"Yea, well you were supposed to be here ten minutes ago!" She whirled her chair around to face him, not hiding her annoyance.

Matthew stood, leaning in the doorway dressed in jeans, a black t-shirt, and a leather jacket, his face was expressionless.

"I came, didn't I?" He asked her.

"Late, might I remind you." She said, gritting her teeth. Her week had not been going well at all. It seemed her roster had gone on an injury and sickness spree right near the end of the season, with only three weeks left.

"Somebody's been having a bad day..." She heard him mutter as he closed the door behind him.

"Not a bad day...a bad week...You don't know the half of it..." She told him darkly.

"No I don't, but you're about to tell me all about it." He sounded so cocky, as though she always confided in him. Mia could see the smug grin growing on his lips.

Her heart was speeding up. Calm down! She told herself, He came late, I should be furious with him! She reminded herself.

"Nope, I won't be telling you." She said, as she got his file from her desk.

"Yes you will. I am here and instead of taking it out on me; you're going to explain why there's a thunder cloud over your head...since I know you hate thunder..." He said with a wicked grin, as he sat on the examination table, taking off the jacket and placing it beside him.

He chooses the worst times to be nice and funny! Mia fumed. He had been humorous more than usual as of late...Mia wasn't in the mood to figure out why.

"Hold on! When have I ever taken it out on you?" Mia asked, crossing her hands over her chest, giving him a look of utter disdain although he had her about the thunder.

"Right now, you were chewing me out just because I came a few minutes late." He told her with a look of innocence.

"Really? A few minutes? Would you like me to count how many times you've been late?" Mia couldn't contain her laughter.

"You really are full of yourself, Rossi." She told him as she walked to him.

"Yes I am, and since you insulted me, I deserve an explanation to what I owe this pleasure to." Matthew retorted, much to Mia's surprise.

Not wanting to argue with him any longer, Mia sighed. She was way too easy to break.

"Alright...fine...some of the reserves have sustained injuries...one broke his arm, and one guy broke his leg; and two of them came down with fevers. From my first team guys, Nate also caught a fever, Andrew broke his foot, and Ivan has two ribs broken from the last match." She told him, her irritation seeping in to her voice.

"It's like my roster decided to go on an injury spree right at the end of the season! Calvin and Kyle are laughing at me. Both of their rosters are alright this week, for the first time!" She complained, she had been meticulous in caring for her roster, it drove her crazy that so many had gotten hurt at the same time. The fevers she had been blaming on Jon...he had to have missed something, she thought with annoyance.

"That's what's gotten you in such a bad mood?" She was forced to look at Matthew. He was quietly laughing at her.

"What did you think?" Mia asked, growing more annoyed as he continued to laugh.

"I don't know...but I didn't think you would be so upset at them getting hurt."

"What do you mean? Their my roster! Of course I'm going to be upset if they get hurt!" Mia protested, but it only made Matthew laugh at her even more.

Letting her temper get the better of her, Mia smacked him with the file in her hand.

"Hey! What was that for?" He asked still laughing, bracing for the impact of her next smack.

"Quit laughing at me!" She said, smacking him once more.

Getting off the table, Matthew lunged for the file as she hit his arm again.

"Give me that!" He said, trying to grab it from her hand.

"Nope!" She said, whipping him with it again.

"Give it to me!"

"No!" She smacked him again.

Matthew grabbed her wrist, trying to keep her from moving farther from him. He pulled her closer, as she tried to wave the file out of his reach. Mia could feel her heart racing. He had to hear the pounding noise coming from her rib cage.

They wrestled, Mia trying to get out of his grip, and Matthew trying to grab the folder from her while trying not to hurt her.

-----

Trying to keep Mia from wacking him with the folder again, Matthew had instinctively grabbed one of her wrists, and pulled her closer. Her lab coat whirled around the deep blue knee lenght dress she was wearing over top of black capris.

Shouldn't have done that, his brain told him albeit delayed. I was supposed to keep away from her! He ignored the warning bells ringing in his head.

This time they were completely alone. How could he deny himself this oppertunity? Something came over him.

He had come not expecting to find her in a right little mood. Trying to cheer her up Matthew had tried to make her talk, but her stubborn streak had led them to this...of course it hadn't helped that he had laughed at her when she had told him what was behind her foul mood.

Turning her to him, Matthew tried to grab the folder from her, but she waved it out of his reach.

"Come on! Hand it over!"

"No!"

"Okay, then you leave me no choice..." He told her, trying to scare her.

"Pfftt...what are you going to do?" She asked nonchalantly, giving him another well deserved smack upside the head.

His mind shut off. In a daze he did what he could to get the file.

"This!" And He put one arm underneath her legs and scooping her off the ground, all the while one arm cradled her back.

For a brief moment, Matthew realized that Mia was close enough for him to kiss. Leaning forward to do just that, Matthew saw her glittering green eyes, look at him with surprise. Catching himself before he could go any farther, Matthew swung her in an attempt to distract both of them.

"Stop!" She squealed.

"Will you hit me with the file again?" Matthew asked, as he kept held her off the ground.

"Yes!" And the file smacked him on the head.

"Stop doing that!"

"Put me down!"

"Then will you stop hitting me?" He asked her nicely.

"Nope" She told him smugly, as the folder went down on his head again.

"Suit yourself then..." And with that, Matthew surprised himself, by letting go of her back moving her legs over his shoulder, and dangling her, a few inches off the ground.

He watched as Mia gasped in shock and struggled to keep her lab coat, and dress in place, the file dropping to the ground.

"I did tell you not to keep whacking me." He told her with a smirk. Her cheeks bright red, Mia glared at him, from where she was hanging.

Satisfied, Matthew pulled her back up, and placed Mia on the examination table.

Shaking his head to clear his mind from the little day dream, Matthew found himself holding Mia as she waved the file out of his reach.

"Can't say I didn't warn you." He reminded her, reaching out and plucking the file from her hand with his quick reflexes. She tried to get the file from him, but it fell on to the floor.

Letting her go at last, he got her file, and collected the papers before offering it to her.

"You didn't!" She shot back, her face still bright red, taking the file from him.

Settling himself down on the table, Matthew couldn't help but regret not stealing a kiss. He watched as she went to retrieve a pen.

I really need to control myself, He thought rather unhappily. Had his rude reputation not preceded him, maybe they'd be closer. Matthew stopped thinking about the endless possibilities. You can't turn back time, he thought mournfully.

Mia pulled a chair close to him, as she started asking him questions, the colour from her cheeks starting to fade; Matthew realized how much time he had left with her. The season was almost over. He had spent most of it cleaning up the mess he had made...and now he could only think of how much he would be missing her as he mechanically answered her questions.

It's better this way...I'll never be good enough for you...He thought.