Travis
I'm being accepted by everyone but myself.
I didn't want to have to do this.
Not again.
I pulled hatefully at my hair and fingered my plugs, sighing a large sigh. This wasn't how I intended things to turn out.
Looking down to what I was writing, I scribbled everything out and started over again. I leaned my head back and drooped in the uncomfortable chair. The pen rolled out of my hand and hit the floor. Closing my eyes, I remembered a simpler time. A time still so full of holes and problems.
"I'm getting pretty big now. My tour manager is talking about a nationwide tour," I said as I rubbed my girlfriend's back. She'd just gotten home from her last class of the evening, worn out from how often she'd had to be on her feet. She was in a nursing program.
She hummed in response, not really saying anything. I figured she was almost asleep. "India," I said again, nudging her. "Sit up and talk to me."
Huffing, she obliged and rolled over to sit up. She supported herself on her elbows, getting some of her long, honey colored hair caught between her elbow and the bed. "What, Travis? I heard you about the tour, I know you're excited, but frankly, I'm not. If you haven't noticed, most of your 'fans' are girls."
"So? India, are you implying that I'll leave you?"
"No, but I'm saying you'll... smoke or drink a little too much and your judgement won't be the best."
"I won't do anything I'll regret. I won't fuck up."
That discussion is what led me to where I was now. Sitting at the kitchen table with my plate full of problems. Sitting at the kitchen table like a fucking coward. I was taking the easy way out.
Quickly, I scribbled down a note and threw the pen down before I could change my mind.
Like a fucking pussy, I was leaving before she came home. I was going to be on tour for a year. I was leaving my plate full of problems at the table, refusing to eat them and deal with them.
India came home that night to an empty feeling apartment. After searching for Travis and failing to find him, she saw the note on the kitchen table.
"Remember the night we met? When I said 'I'm not looking for my one, I'm looking for my right now.'? I wasn't lying, India. It's been a great year, but I think this is where we have to part.
My career has gotten closer to the sun, I'm where I want to be musically. I've done some things in small doses that you didn't know about. Now, don't think that I'm pushing you away, even though I sort of am. You're the person that I've kept closest. And I'll always keep you close in my heart.
I hate that it has to end this way and I wasn't man enough to face you.
I have to do me now.
T. Mills."
She ripped the note apart. She didn't want him anymore anyway. He wasn't Travis anymore. He was T. Mills and that was a person she wanted nothing to do with.
Not again.
I pulled hatefully at my hair and fingered my plugs, sighing a large sigh. This wasn't how I intended things to turn out.
Looking down to what I was writing, I scribbled everything out and started over again. I leaned my head back and drooped in the uncomfortable chair. The pen rolled out of my hand and hit the floor. Closing my eyes, I remembered a simpler time. A time still so full of holes and problems.
"I'm getting pretty big now. My tour manager is talking about a nationwide tour," I said as I rubbed my girlfriend's back. She'd just gotten home from her last class of the evening, worn out from how often she'd had to be on her feet. She was in a nursing program.
She hummed in response, not really saying anything. I figured she was almost asleep. "India," I said again, nudging her. "Sit up and talk to me."
Huffing, she obliged and rolled over to sit up. She supported herself on her elbows, getting some of her long, honey colored hair caught between her elbow and the bed. "What, Travis? I heard you about the tour, I know you're excited, but frankly, I'm not. If you haven't noticed, most of your 'fans' are girls."
"So? India, are you implying that I'll leave you?"
"No, but I'm saying you'll... smoke or drink a little too much and your judgement won't be the best."
"I won't do anything I'll regret. I won't fuck up."
That discussion is what led me to where I was now. Sitting at the kitchen table with my plate full of problems. Sitting at the kitchen table like a fucking coward. I was taking the easy way out.
Quickly, I scribbled down a note and threw the pen down before I could change my mind.
Like a fucking pussy, I was leaving before she came home. I was going to be on tour for a year. I was leaving my plate full of problems at the table, refusing to eat them and deal with them.
India came home that night to an empty feeling apartment. After searching for Travis and failing to find him, she saw the note on the kitchen table.
"Remember the night we met? When I said 'I'm not looking for my one, I'm looking for my right now.'? I wasn't lying, India. It's been a great year, but I think this is where we have to part.
My career has gotten closer to the sun, I'm where I want to be musically. I've done some things in small doses that you didn't know about. Now, don't think that I'm pushing you away, even though I sort of am. You're the person that I've kept closest. And I'll always keep you close in my heart.
I hate that it has to end this way and I wasn't man enough to face you.
I have to do me now.
T. Mills."
She ripped the note apart. She didn't want him anymore anyway. He wasn't Travis anymore. He was T. Mills and that was a person she wanted nothing to do with.
♠ ♠ ♠
Whahey, I could maybe turn this into a full story, but for now it's just a one shot. Depends on the feedback I get. ;)commenting, recommending, and the likes would be fucking fabulous.