Phoebe

After a few days of not talking to anyone, I was ambushed by four girls after school.

"Hey, when are we going to release the list?"
"Have you even started tracking down the girls?"
"Why haven't you said anything to us for a week?"

It was like I was zapped by electricity and suddenly was jolted awake. I viewed the four sophomores with wide eyes.

"Huh?" was my brilliant response to their questions. I suppose electrical forces do impair the senses sometimes.

Dava rolled her eyes. "I told you guys she hadn't even started working on it."

"No, no, I finished the list," I said a bit dazedly.

"Well, when are we going to post it?" Lisa asked.

I shrugged. "I don't know. I'll, uh, call you guys later once I clear some things up."

They let me get in my car and leave then. I didn't go home. I didn't go to the library. I didn't even go to Starbucks. In fact, it didn't register to me that I was even going anywhere special until I was there.

Getting out of the car, I wondered why in the world my vapid mind had led me there. But I didn't know why -- not even one reason -- and so my body continued to the door where my finger rang the doorbell.

"Oh, hi, Phee," he said cheerfully. And just like that I was crying in his arms.

There were two uncomfortable pats on my back and I stifled a sob.

Oh God. What have I done? I thought, pulling away quickly.

"Sorry, sorry. I don't know what I was thinking, Ted."

My fingers swiped the underside of my wet eyes and I gazed up at him.

"Phoebe -- my God -- are you okay?!" he questioned.

And I nodded because there was nothing else I could say.

I allowed Theodore to usher me forward so he could close the door. Then, after a few more steps, we were in his bedroom.

"Di -- distract me, please," I finally uttered.

He faltered a bit at those words but then jumped into his normal self. As normal as he could be with an almost sniveling girl in his room, sitting on his bed.

He clapped his hands once on his thighs and made a spin in the computer chair. "Phee, you are an absolute genius! I honest-to-God wish I had met you earlier in my life. Your advice would have saved me countless times I'm sure."

It gladdened me to see him so happy. The last time I had seen him -- the first time I met him -- he was so downcast. And now the roles had reversed. He was the one mostly content with the world and I was the one who felt like a pineapple truck had hit them.

"Get this. I went over to the school one day and blocked Clara before she could get in her car. I figured I had a better chance of talking to her in public than on the phone. For one, there was no chance of being hung up on. And for another, she couldn't kill me in front of all those people. Well, I suppose she could have run me over and called it an accident . . . but she didn't!

"She heard me out, Phoebe! She understood! Clara said my grandmother was just trying to keep my options open. She said she couldn't really fault someone for following familial orders. That, yes, she was upset at first but then was just generally heartbroken. But after I apologized and told her anything, she hugged me and we're back together."

Once that ramble concluded, Ted rolled the chair over a bit and opened a drawer. "I need your opinion, Phee. I mean, you're like brilliantly insightful so whatever you think must be true."

I had automatically raised my eyebrow at him calling me insightful (if I was so insightful then why didn't I know why I was upset?) but then I was sidetracked by the small box he laid in my hands. A black box. A jewelry box. My hands somehow figured out how to work and the box opened. There on the padding was a silver ring with a small golden heart.

"It's a promise ring," he explained. "There's no way I could ask Clara to marry me now. I mean, we're so young and everything. But I want her to know that I will always be there for her. Even if we get married, or don't stay together forever, I want it to be known that I will always be her friend, that she can't get rid of me easily."

I glanced at the ring once more and looked up at the waiting Theodore. "I think there will be no doubt in her mind that you love her."

He beamed as he replaced the box.

"You're sure she'll like it?" he asked again.

"It's true I don't personally know Clara but she has to be an idiot if she looks at this and doesn't think it's the sweetest thing in the world," I elaborated.

My statement quelled his fears, momentarily at least, and his mind, having cleared up a whole warehouse of doubts, was able to wander to more subjects.

"Phoebe, how's school?" he questioned.

"Mm . . . okay. Grades are perfect like always."

His face took on an expression of great comprehension. You could almost see the light bulb above his head. It irritated me because my own thoughts were clouded and because I had no clue what Theodore had just realized.

"What?" I asked purposely nonchalantly.

"Oh, I just remembered something. I hear your sister is dating my brother Kev. How's that affecting you?"

How is thataffecting me?

"Not very. Ivy doesn't talk much about Kevin to me," I avoided. Like she talks to me about anything anymore.

"Oh," he said and his face fell. I conceived Ted had thought I had come over to complain about his brother spending so much time with my sister. It would have been the perfect alibi but I had not reacted quickly enough to assume the lie.

"Ted, don't worry. I'm fine . . . just fine."

He shook his head fiercely, assuring me that I did in fact look as horrible and pathetic as I felt. "No, Phee, you're not."

Lies were not good, lies are not good, and lies never will be good. They cause so much confusion, chaos, and mixed feelings. As this realization fully hit me, the truth started to spill out from my lips. Theodore Royce, brother to my sworn enemy, listened without interruption as I rambled about my life.

"You cannot expect me to be happy that you're trying to destroy my brother. After all, the bastard is my brother. But I'm not concerned with all the drama concerning our siblings. Forget that for the moment and focus on the other topic that is bothering you."

My blubbering had all but seized and the only thing that even hinted at my earlier distress was my tired, red-rimmed eyes. Confessing everything had done wonders. Theodore should be a priest or clergyman or whatever they're called. But perhaps he would be better suited as a psychiatrist.

"What do you mean? Joey?"

"Yes."

"I've lost a good friend, I think, and I don't even know why. I don't think I said or did anything to offend him but I could be wrong about that."

"I don't know Joey," he stated before adding, "but I do know you. And I remember everything you've ever said to me Phoebe. Like I said, you are a great adviser. Your only problem seems to be that you don't listen to your own words."

"Care to elaborate?" I nearly snarled. "Joey hates me. It would be suicidal to talk to him ever again."

"'You have nothing you lose. Either you tell him the truth and he accepts and forgives you, or he doesn't and you know for a fact that he despises you.' Phee, that's almost a direct quote."

And, sure enough, it was. I remembered saying that days ago. Weeks ago. Theodore had merely changed the gender from female to male. Repackage and resale.

I stood and started to move toward the door. "Thanks so much, Teddy. I know this sounds crazy, but, dude, I love you."

I left then exiting his room as quickly as humanly possible.