Take Your Hand And Walk Away

I rolled around a few times in bed trying to get comfortable, but I just couldn’t. I sighed looking over at the empty space next to me. It just wasn’t the same. It didn’t feel right without him next to me. I groaned sitting up out of bed.

I walked down the quit house feeling a certain sadness. I sat at the top of the stairs looking at the door, as if expecting him to come walking through drunk like always.

But nothing happened, it remained quite. I thought back to when I first found out about his secret……………………

**1 year earlier**

I sat on the couch with a huge bowl of ice cream in my hands sobbing hysterically.

“It’s ok,” my friend Bobby said soothing, but I shook my head.

“It’s not ok, we have been together for a year and he never told me,” I cried.

“Well he’s a jerk then,” Bobby mumbled.

“Yeah, but a jerk that I fell in love with,” I added sadly. He nodded not really knowing what to say. I slowly stopped crying but didn’t bother to wipe away the tears that were still on my face. Everything seemed to go quite.

“I cant believe he never told me, he has been lying to me this whole time,” I whispered, but bobby heard.

“I cant believe it either,” he muttered angrily. “I thought he loved you.”

I grabbed the necklace I had been wearing, which was a silver guitar that he had bought me.

“I thought so too,” I answered. Deep down something told me that he did.

“Well what are you going to do?” Bobby asked. I shook my head letting out one final sob.

“I have no idea.”

I crawled in bed quietly awaiting Zacky. I wasn’t sure what I was going to say though. Hell I wasn’t sure if there was even anything to say. He made me so happy I wasn’t sure if I was willing to let that slip away.

Truth be told I loved him, like crazy. Like I had never loved anyone before. I didn’t want to give him up.

I heard the front door open, and I stiffened knowing it was him and that he would come walking up the stairs any moment.

I laid back in bed deciding to pretend to be asleep, to by me more time to figure out what to do. The door opened a moment later and he walked over to me.

“Baby are you awake?” he asked sweetly. I tried to stay still and keep my breathing normal. He sighed standing up. I heard a few dressers open and assumed he had gotten changed into pajamas. I heard the door opened again.

“I love you,” he said quietly. I slowly opened my eyes.

“I love you too.”

** present time**

I should have told him right then and there that I knew. Nothing was ever the same after that night. We still we in love but it killed me everyday that I knew he was lying to me.

I tried to believe that he was telling the truth when he said I love you.

I decided to go get changed and visit Bobby, even though it was the middle of the night.

I knocked on the door patiently waiting the answer and praying that bobby still lived here. I rang the doorbell five time knowing he was probably asleep. A few moments later a very tired and angry looking figured emerged.

“Bobby?” I asked unsure.

“Jas?” he asked surprised. I hadn’t seen him since the band had come on tour.

“Yeah it’s me,” I answered. He laughed opening the door more and pulling me into a hug.

“Your back.”

“Yeah I’m back………………..alone,” I muttered.

“What are you doing here it’s the middle of the night?” he pointed out.

“I know I just had to see you,” I mumbled. He laughed releasing me from the hug and pulling me into the house.

“Well welcome back.”

I laughed as Bobby continued to describe to me how hot his new girlfriend was. We sat at a cute little café by the beach eating brunch.

“I missed you,” I confessed. He laughed nodding.

“I missed you too,” he said. We had avoided talking about Zacky which I was thankful for, but I knew what was coming next.

“Did you leave Zacky?”

“Yeah,” I answered taking a sip of water, and trying to sound calm about it.

“Does he know why?” Bobby asked. I shook my head finishing the last of my water.

“He doesn’t know that I know,” I informed him. Bobby nodded motioning towards my water.

“Are you sure you don’t want a beer?” he asked. I shook my head again.

“I cant,” I answered slowly. Bobby tilted his head looking at me strangely, but just then the waitress came giving him the check. I sighed relieved and we began arguing about who was going to pay. Bobby won.

“I’m glad you left him,” Bobby said as we drove back to my house. “He wasn’t good enough for you.”

“Oh and you are?” I asked jokingly. He laughed.

“No I’m just saying, I think it’s good to get away from all the lying.”

“So do I but……………” I started.

“But what?”

“I really miss him,” I answered slowly. He was like a drug I was addicted to. I knew how bad he was for me, but I always wanted more. Bobby didn’t say anything and we drove the rest of the way in silence.

We rounded the curve to my street and I noticed someone walking up the steps to our house. At fist I thought it was Zacky but as we got closer my heart sank. My eyes widened, and my mouth dropped. Bobby looked over at me.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

I couldn’t say the words, but I pointed towards the house. The two people were walking towards the front door. I didn’t have to say anything for Bobby to understand. He came to a stop outside our house my house not knowing what to do or say.

The two people turned around and I looked at them carefully.

One was a tall blonde woman who was very pretty. She dressed preppy and I couldn’t help thinking she looked a little snobby. In her hand was the hand of the second person.

A cute little dirty blonde haired girl who looked about four. She had little pigtails on and a light blue dress on. I stared at her knowing she looked exactly like Zacky.