I Know The Way You've Been Living

From The Outside Looking In

Orange County based rock band Avenged Sevenfold is that band that even your uptight parents would enjoy. Their insane riffs and honest lyrics are two of the things that got them to where they are right now. But that’s not what they’re all about! You know how rock bands are constantly associated with drugs, sex and alcohol abuse? Trust me when I say that Avenged Sevenfold are nothing like that, they’re even worse than you could ever imagine.

I had an amazing opportunity to spend time with the band and experience first hand what being in Avenged Sevenfold is all about. The thing is ladies and gentleman, it ain’t pretty.

When bands are on stage and they smash their instrument, we would think that it was part of the act right? But what do you think when a drummer ripped his snare drum apart during practice, just because his fellow band mate drank his whiskey? The Reverend Tholomew Plague, or you may know him as The Rev, would always show up to practice either half drunk or completely out of it. It was actually tiring to watch them practice the same thing over and over because he was too drunk to focus and get his tracks right. It would take him a full day to record one set, because he was too intoxicated to even see his drum set. I would say embarrassing, but that would be an understatement. He is pathetic.

My hands were starting to tremble from anger that’s building up inside my chest. There’s a picture of Jimmy holding his broken snare and he was laughing. This is not true! Yes Jimmy did rip his snare drum apart but not because Zacky stole his whiskey! It was an accident and Blake knew damn well it was an accident.

While we’re still on the subject of alcohol abuse among rock stars, why don’t we talk about Synyster Gates? Last week the greatest guitarist, Mr. Brian Haner Jr. was hospitalized for alcohol poisoning. He was found in his home here in Huntington Beach passed out with bottles of alcohol sprawled on his living room floor, along with a bag of cocaine. I think he may have forgot his worldwide broadcast of promise that he will get clean and sobered up huh?

My breath was caught on my throat as I saw the picture he uploaded. Brian was lying facedown on his living room floor with empty bottles next to him. The next picture was the disgusting white powder that was on his table, with all of us circling Brian in the background.

I can’t believe he took pictures while we all feared for Brian’s life.

Don’t get me started on his fellow guitar player, Zacky Vengeance…

I couldn’t continue reading. I looked up and saw Matt still standing beside my bed, with his hand forming into a fist.

“This can’t be right, you’re just making this up! Blake would never do this to me, to you guys!”

“Look at the bottom of the last page”

I flipped the paper to the last page and it feels like someone just dropped 100 pounds marshal’s speaker onto my chest.



And as if I wasn’t hurting enough



Samantha Marin? I couldn’t believe my eyes. Blake and Sam was in this together!?

“This is all your fault Mel, I can’t believe you would let him do this to your brother, to us! I thought we were family” He looked at me with a look I thought I’d never see from Matt.

Disgust and hatred.

Tears started to fill up my eyes; I still can’t believe what Blake did to me. He lied to me, he used me, he ruined my brother’s career.

“How should I know that he was going to do this?! I’m not a fucking mind reader Matt, you can’t blame this on me! It’s not fair!”

“NOT FAIR?! Let me tell you what’s not fair, Melanie Baker. What’s unfair is; we have spent our life, time, money making this band work and you let ONE STUPID RELATIONSHIP ruin our whole career. What’s unfair is now Brian has to face the world’s judgment of him being hospitalized, as if the problem he’s going through isn’t bad enough. What’s unfair is now people think Jimmy as anger issues, people are telling him to take anger management class! If you would just think Melanie, THINK before you do something maybe this whole shit wouldn’t happen! You are such a fucking idiot Melanie”

By now tears were streaming down my cheeks like a waterfall. Never in my life I had someone talk to me like this, not even for something that’s my fault.

“Do something Melanie,” Matt shouted at me and turned towards the door, “Fix it” He went out and slammed the door behind him. My crying became harder and harder, not because I was sad, but because I was so furious that I let myself be used like this.

I threw my duvet to the floor and head to the bathroom. I freshen up, put on the first clothes I saw and went down the stairs. I passed Matt, Johnny and Zacky in the TV room and ran outside the door, ignoring the fact that they were calling me. All I can think about is killing Blake.

I kept walking and walking with my tears streaming down my face, I finally stopped when I saw Blake’s house on the corner of the street. I took a deep breath, to assure myself that this is the right thing to do.

No, it’s not. But it’s what I HAVE to do.

I walked up to his driveway and straight to his door, I barged right in without thinking who might be inside. I saw Blake sitting on the couch with his feet propped to his coffee table, watching TV and eating Fritos, acting like nothing was going on.

“You! What the fuck is wrong with you!” I shouted at Blake and point my finger at him. He jumped out of his seat and looked at me surprised for a second, then his expression changed into cockiness.

He walked towards me and yanked my hand.

“Let go of me you fucking creep!” I tried yanking my arm free but he was too strong and he dragged me towards the driveway

“What are you thinking barging into someone’s home like that? Didn’t your parents raised you with manners?” He crossed his arms and smirk.

“What the fuck is this?” I shoved the papers onto his chest, completely ignoring his insult.

“This sweetie, is a blog post made by yours truly” He smiled cockily

“WHY THE FUCK DID YOU WRITE THAT?! The shit you said, none of them are true! You know that!” I was starting to cry again.

“Well, but the readers don’t” He winked

“So all this time you were just using me? All the stuff you said, was it all a lie?” I said barely above whisper

“Oh of course not sweetie, I did mean it when I say I’ll be fine with you moving to New York, like I actually give a shit about you” He laughed, “let me clear this up for you dear Melanie, I’m so not into you. I don’t even give a shit about you and what you do, hell; I didn’t even know you exist until you showed up in the newspaper room. I only started to talk to you because I found out you’re Zacky’s sister” He laughed again, now even louder.

The out of nowhere, it’s like my hand moved on its own, I punched Blake right on his nose.

“WHAT THE FUCK?!” He cupped his nose and blood started trickling down to his lips, “You insane bitch! Get out of my house!” He shoved me with his bloody hand, I spat on him and turned my heel away from him.

I walked back home, feeling a little bit better than I did before. When I got home, the guys were still sitting in the living room area, with their tense and serious look on their faces.

“Melanie, where the hell have you been?!” Zacky stood up and grabbed me by the shoulders.

“None of your fucking business! Get off!” I wiggled myself out of Zacky’s grip and walked towards the stairs.

“Melanie, we’re not done talking” He growled, I stopped and turned around. Why can’t people stop pissing me off!

“Yes we are Zacky, you know this is all your fault. If you weren’t my brother, THIS WHOLE THING wouldn’t happen! I hate you, I hate all of you! You guys basically ruined my life since the day you got signed, and all these time I have been wishing that I wasn’t your sister. You know why? HAVING YOU AS A BROTHER IS A FUCKING PAIN IN THE ASS! I wish you were dead!” I screamed with all my heart and ran up to my room, slamming the door behind me.

I’m so glad I’m moving out, I can’t wait till I’m out of here.