Status: Complete. Thank you for reading. c:

Take One Last Breath

It Only Takes Three Words To Break A Heart

..::Austin’s P.O.V::..

“Austine, darling,” I heard Ville whisper into my ear as I slowly started to stir. I could see the faint sunlight behind my eyelids, suggesting it was about nine or ten in the morning. I groaned before I turned over, letting my arm fall over Ville.

“Can’t we just lay here all day?” I begged. My voice was hoarse, and I immediately felt hungry and thirsty.

“But, it’s a beautiful day, where my beautiful girl should be enjoying it. The beach is practically empty,” he countered.

“Because the water’s always cold, Ville,” I moaned, turning over again so I was flat on my belly.

“We could still walk around in the sand. I mean, we’re up here, we should enjoy it. We can start to look for Kori and Bam tomorrow, and then we can sleep in again,” he said, giving me butterfly kisses on my cheek. I moaned again out of frustration, because I was so tired, “Please Austine,” he begged, dragging out the ‘e’ sound in ‘please’. I moaned once again, overdramatically. I rolled to the edge of the bed and let myself drop to the floor. I landed with a big ‘oomf’, and Ville immediately came to my aid.

“I’m out of bed,” I groaned, and Ville turned me onto my back.

“Are you alright?” he asked, lifting my head up. I didn’t open my eyes, but cuddled into his chest.

“Yeah, just hand me that pillow and blanket,” I ordered, wanted to drift off to sleep. Ville chuckled before he stood up, carrying me out of the room bridal style, and down the stairs. I still didn’t open my eyes, but I still talked, “Are you gonna make me eat breakfast?” I asked.

“I am,” he said, and I could hear the smile in his voice.

“Are you going to make me take a shower and get dressed?” I asked.

“I am,” he replied, the smile still on his face.

“Are you going to force me to go down to the beach?” I asked.

“You betcha,” I loved the way his voice sounded when there was a smile present. It made me smile, even though I looked like an idiot because I was tired and my eyes haven’t opened yet, “And you’re going to enjoy it.” He said matter of factly. I didn’t deny it, because I always enjoyed being around Ville. He’s the first person that I’ve felt loved by, and the first person I willingly allowed myself to love. He laid me down on the couch, and kissed my forehead.

“What are you making for breakfast?” I asked as I snuggled against the back of the couch.

“Food, love. What else?” he said, and sat me up, “And you’ve got to wake the hell up,” he added. I smirked as I opened my eyes and into his own. Neither of us said anything, but instead, I leaned up and tenderly kissed him on the lips. I rested my arms on his shoulders, and held my hands in the back of his neck, pulling him closer to me. He had bad morning breath, and I laughed at the though. Ville pulled away, knitting his eyebrows together, “What?” he asked defensively, but I could see he was holding back a smile.

“Let’s go make that food,” I suggested, and I used him to help me up. I yawned, which turned into a full stretch. Once I was done, I grabbed Ville’s hand, and held it as we walked into the kitchen.

“So what do you want me to make?” He asked, going through the cabinets looking for breakfast foods.

“How about I make the food, babe?” I asked, and he opened his mouth to protest, but I pecked him again and walked to the pantry, finding the Bisquick.

“I like chocolate chips in my pancakes,” he said in defeat, and pushed himself onto one of the counters, where he watched me search the cabinets until I found a small back of milk chocolate morsels.

“So did my dad,” I said absent-mindedly as I set the ingredients on the island in the middle of the kitchen, and continued to grab the rest of the ingredients and a frying pan. Ville talked about how amazing I was as I cooked our food, and the only thing I could think of was that he was being super nice and mushy this morning for some reason, and that I didn’t really mind it. It was nice, it made me feel good. He continued to steal a kiss here and there, and I started getting butterflies in my stomach. He took two plates out as I finished making a small stack of pancakes, and he carried them into the dining area. He sat close to me as we ate, and our arms kept making contact. I suddenly felt conscious about myself as I continued feeling his eyes on me. When we were done, we got showered, and I pulled on a pair of shorts and an old Bauhaus shirt. It was slightly ripped in places, but I was only going down the road to the beach.

I walked to the bathroom to get Ville since he’d been in there for fifteen minutes. I was about to open the door when I heard hush whispering coming from Ville. It sounded like he was talking to somebody, since he was asking questions, and I didn’t hear anybody answering. Eavesdropping was the last thing I wanted to do, so I walked away until I heard three words that I thought were only supposed to be said to me.

“I love you,” he whispered. He said it again, took a deep breath, and then again. He wasn’t talking to family, I know, because when he talks to them, it’s in Finnish. My heart fell through my ass, and I immediately blamed myself. This is what happens when I let somebody love me, or when I let myself love somebody. Then it all made sense. That’s why he was super happy. I wasn’t the one causing it. My blame turned into self pity. I didn’t have the ability to make anybody happy. I heard Ville walking towards the door, and I stumbled back into my childhood room. How would I bring this up? What would I say? I felt like my words were stuck in my throat, “Ready to go?” he asked as he walked in. I wanted to cry as I saw the smile on his face, knowing I wasn’t the one who put it there. I bit my tongue, and I knew what I was going to do. When he went back to Finland, I’d tell him he was going alone. I couldn’t leave Kori. No, I’d tell him I was gay. That always ended up well. I nodded my head for the time being, and he grabbed my hand, and led me towards the beach.

“So. Tomorrow we can spend the day looking for Kori and Bam, right?” I asked with not much happiness in my voice. I didn’t much want to talk to Ville, but I couldn’t tip off what I heard. Not yet at least.

“Of course, darling,” I cringed inside when he called me darling. In fact, it made me sick. I didn’t respond as we walked around Percy’s store and onto the sand of the beach. He reached down for my hand, and I let him take it. But it killed me. I won’t lie, I felt like I was dying on the inside. Neither of us talked, but listened to the waves of the ocean. He had been right, it was brilliant out, and if I wasn’t in a different world right now, I would be enjoying it. I would enjoy Ville. But I couldn’t. There was only one thing I could think about. The beach seemed endless as we walked, and I let myself forget about being mad just for now. Just until we left the beach, “Austine,” Ville said, sounding almost nervous. I had the mind to snap at him for using my full name, and that he needs to call me by my nickname, but again, I held my tongue. I turned to face him, and he turned us so we were parallel to the line of the shore.

“Yep?” I asked, rocking back and forth between the balls of my toes and my heels.

“There was a reason I took so long in the bathroom,” he started, and I let out a breath. So now I didn’t have to fake gay, he would tell me about the other girl. How she was so much better than me.

“I know,” I said simply. He looked surprised. He should be. Then a smile crawled onto his face.

“So you know how much I love you?” He asked, and his hands slid down my arms from my shoulders to holding my hands. Well, this took an unexpected turn, “I’d been practicing in the bathroom, but I still think I might look like an idiot.”

“What do you mean?” I was a little confused, I admit. Practicing? He nodded his head before he slowly lowered to one knee, and it took me a second before my brain was able to process just exactly what was going on.

“I know that technically, we’re already married,” he started, “but we were drunk, and I didn’t know you. But now I love you more than I could imagine, and really, I’d like to spend the rest of my life with you. Would you marry me again, but this time, traditionally?” My knees felt weak, and the words were stuck in my throat. Instead, I tackled him, and threw my arms around him. I kissed him on the lips over and over again.

“Yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes,” I finally managed to say, and couldn’t stop saying it. The smile never left my mouth as I held him. Now it made more sense why he was talking to himself in the mirror. I calmed down and rested on top of him, staring out in the abyss of the ocean as he stroked my hair.

“I feel happy all throughout,” he said, and he kissed the side of my head.

“It doesn’t even feel like happiness. More like…warmth. Fullness, you know?” I confessed, not letting my eyes linger from the moving water. Neither of us said anything after that. We just lie down on the sand and listen to the birds and the water until the sun was at its highest.

“You think we should go back?” He asked, and I nodded as I got up off of him, and helped him up. We didn’t say anything as we walked back, but we held each other’s hands, “I need to show you something,” he whispered into my ear, “upstairs,” he didn’t let go of my hand as he led me up the stairs. He closed the door behind him, and led me over to the bed. He turned around, and his lips were on mine. “I need to show you what love feels like, Austine,” he said gently, and he lowered me back onto my bed. He gently crawled on top of me, continuing the butterfly kisses he left off with earlier. We’d had sex before, but it never felt like this. It was less about me, and more about him. I felt less conscious about each of my flaws, but instead let Ville explore them. He told me he loved me many times throughout the experience, and I said them back. It felt right in every way. It was getting dark by the time we were done, and we pulled the blanket over ourselves as he held me.

He sung When Love and Death Embrace to me as I slowly fell asleep. The last thing I saw before I was pulled into unconsciousness was his face, and I’m sure I fell asleep with a smile on my face.

©Shannon.
♠ ♠ ♠
Thanks to all of the readers and subscribers. A special thanks to the comments;
MoMo_92
kaylakelly49
Miss Preciado

No, actually, I'm alive. I just can't update on weekends ; _;

xoxo, Shannon.