Come Alive

“Ya know, I’m having difficulties believing you’re actually as famous as this show’s making you seem.” Jack mumbled through a full mouth of Chinese food as he motioned toward the TV set across the room. “And what are they even complaining about? Do they stalk your every move or something?”

“Hm?” Alex, with his feet propped up next to Jack’s at the foot of the hospital bed, looked up from his phone, “Why are you even watching that shit?” It was nearly the end of Jack’s second day in the hospital and Alex was restlessly waiting for the nurses to announce the end of that day’s visiting hours and Jack was sitting in his bed eating the chicken and broccoli Alex had smuggled in for him while watching TMZ.

“Well I don’t actually believe you’re actually an actual rockstar…” Jack yawned and put his food down on the bedside table. Flipping his hips so he was on his side, Jack snuggled into his bed and looked up at Alex, who was still scrolling through his phone, “Whatcha doooooin’?”

Alex looked over at Jack, his black bangs covered his eyes and with the blanket pulled up as high as he could get it, the only parts of his face Alex could actually see were a part of his nose and the rough outline of his eyes. Alex smiled and put his phone down, “Not important. And they’re probably complaining because I’ve been basically holed up in a hospital room with some stranger that’s confusing them. It’s like I’ve disappeared for awhile.”

Jack yawned again and Alex suppressed the urge to push some of the hair off his face, “That’s really funny because you’re not disappeared you’re right here I can see you.”

“Jack… bro, get some sleep…”

“But I wanna talk to you, you just got here.” Jack’s third yawn brought the blankets even further up on his face as he cuddled himself into their comfort, “I miss you.”

If it hadn’t been the fourth time that day that Jack had forgotten how long Alex had actually been there then Alex would have been more worried about Jack’s forgetfulness, but instead he just laughed and nudged Jack’s leg with his foot, “Dude I’ve been sitting in this awful chair all day talking to you about proper ball-shaving techniques, don’t tell me you forgot agaaaaain.”

As Alex had predicted, Jack groaned and hit his head against his mattress, “Did we really talk all day? Goddammit I fucking hate my head.” Then after a moment of silence Jack giggled, “…Is that really all we talked about?” Alex smiled and reminded Jack of their conversations that day—everything from high school to song lyrics to favorite foods to best friends to space ships. This had been the cycle for the past two days, sometimes Jack would be able to carry on conversations for hours without missing a single thing and other times his memory would only last him a mere thirty minutes but every time it happened, he needed Alex to remind him of everything.

“The doctors said you can probably go home tomorrow though, as long as you come back for monitoring and stuff.” Alex smiled in anticipation of Jack’s contagious happiness, but instead he was met with a distressed groan. “You okay, buddy?” Alex couldn’t really figure out why, but something about Jack made him anxious and every little noise from him had Alex on high alert.

“Ye-no. No, Alex I’m not fucking okay.” Jack pulled the covers completely over his face and flipped onto his back, “I can’t remember a goddamn thing, I’m still not a hundred per cent sure of who you are, there’s a fucking bullet wound in my fucking chest, I’m being released from the hospital tomorrow to go home except I don’t even know where home even is, I’m like a lost dog and I’m helpless and I didn’t have any memory problems a few days ago I don’t even remember how long ago I was shot I don’t even remember why I was shot I don’t fucking know anything about myself and I just want everything to go back to normal how long have I even known you?”

“Someone here likes run-on sentences, I see.” Alex poked Jack with his foot again hoping to lighten the mood. Though Alex couldn’t exactly empathize with the guy, he hated seeing him upset.
Jack forced a chuckle but kept his face covered and just as Alex was going to continue, the TV announced “Alex Gaskarth’s disappearance after his near shooting was a worrisome mystery”.” Jack’s laughter now was real as he emerged from his blankets, “Dude, you’re like an episode of Criminal Minds…minus the murder.”

Alex smiled, “Well I’m glad you think it’s funny. I can’t tell you how pissed my label is that I still haven’t talked to the press about what happened the other day. And the fact that you think me ‘missing’ is laughable, real cute.” He tried to make the sarcastic tone in his voice obvious through the last sentence, but the truth was that Alex really did find it cute that Jack was laughing at the tabloids.

Jack sighed, “I’m sorry I keep forgetting so much shit. And I’m sorry you’re sitting here. You shouldn’t be sitting here. Hell, I shouldn’t be sitting here. This whole thing is really fucked up and I don’t really know what went down but you really shouldn’t be sitting here…” Alex opened his mouth to intervene, but Jack held his hand up to shush him, “No, Alex, I mean it. You have your own life to deal with, why are you wasting your energy sitting here right now. I forget who you are every other minute and it’s just dumb. Go take care of your career.”

Alex shook his head, “But I like being here.”

“Uh, Mr. Gaskarth, sir? Visiting hours are over, sorry, but you’ll have to leave now.” A nurse Alex had never seen before interrupted the privacy of Jack’s single hospital room. “You can come back tomorrow morning, if you’d like.”

Alex nodded, “Yes, right, of course.” He stood up and stretched his back out and hit his leg against Jack’s bed, “I’ll see you bright and early, sunshine.” Though Alex didn’t stick around to see it, he knew
Jack was shaking his head and smiling because as much as Jack told Alex to leave, he could tell from their conversations that there wasn’t much that made Jack happier than having someone there with him.